I Still Can’t Believe My University Of Central Florida Knights Won The National Championship

Talk about a meteoric rise. My alma mater that’s younger than my old man and a DI FBS football program that started when I was still riding my big wheel around the mean streets of Delaware County went and did the unthinkable. A program that just went 0-12 two seasons ago and lost to noted FCS 4-8 powerhouse Furman just ran the table and became National Champions seemingly out of the nowhere. I didn’t even know it was possible, but I seen’t it. I seen’t it with my own two eyes.

Signs for the 2018 Natty were everywhere as I went to my seats in the 300 level of Mercedes-Benz Stadium this past Monday. Here I thought I was attending a meaningless exhibition game against a 3 loss SEC team but I was clearly mistaken. UCF had somehow found themselves a glitch in the matrix. The clock struck zero and confetti fell from the rafters. Quarterback McKenzie Milton called for the playoffs to be canceled, our athletic director, Danny White, proclaimed us the best team in the country, and that was that. The parade has been scheduled and the banner has been made. The University of Central Florida Knights: National Champions. Wow.

It’s almost unreal, but that Natty tee is in the mail and that championship banner will fly for years to come so it’s as legit as it gets. Can’t wait to repeat next year.

Image via Youtube

  1. Phitao

    Claiming a national title victory over an Auburn team that UGA beat in the same stadium a month earlier for a tangible championship? Enjoy your participation trophy, snowflake. The real champion, either Bama or UGA, will be hoisting the trophy Monday.

    8 years ago at 1:17 pm
  2. InternationalFratStudent

    Just because bama claims championships that didn’t happen doesn’t mean if you do it UCF will be a legitimate program.

    8 years ago at 2:47 pm
  3. jizzrag69v2

    UCF is like the fat chick that looks hot when she wears something that lets her boobs hang out. You can motorboat that shit all night and pound that big ol’ ass but you’re still banging a fat chick.

    8 years ago at 4:34 pm
  4. Had UCF not cancelled the Georgia Tech game because of the hurricane they’d have a legit argument to be the 4th seed.

    8 years ago at 5:12 pm
    1. jizzrag69v2

      Had your mom not cancelled our date last night she’d have been the fourth mom I fucked in the ass last night after fratty couples’ Mom, sigmanugs mom, and international frat’s mom. No on second thought she would have been the third since you and sigmanugs share the same mom

      8 years ago at 7:19 am
      1. jizzrag69v2

        Your mom made your little brother when I pulled my dick out of her ass and she shit all over the sheets

        8 years ago at 5:37 pm
  5. BuschLattesFTW

    I still can’t believe Jizzragv2 is the poorest/biggest virgin on this site.

    8 years ago at 5:30 pm
    1. jizzrag69v2

      I still can’t believe you are a fucking loser. No on second thought I can believe it. Pussy.

      8 years ago at 7:14 am
  6. 5OClockShadow

    You can’t beat only two Power Five schools in a season and call yourself a national champion.

    See y’all at the real national championship game next Monday.

    8 years ago at 6:28 pm
  7. 50NosAndAYesMeansYes

    James Madison was undefeated this year too. Maybe they should get a national championship trophy.

    8 years ago at 9:26 am
  8. Big Dumb Idiot

    Maybe Hilary Clinton will invite them to the White House. Fucking big tittied idiot.

    8 years ago at 3:58 pm