Iran Wants To Ban Dog Ownership Now Because They Hate Awesome Stuff
According to my Facebook “trending” column, the current news headlines are nothing more than NFL crap and some blurb about Matt Damon returning to play Jason Bourne in a movie to be released in 2016. Those are the kinds of intense struggles everyday Americans have to face in their daily lives.
Iran is a different story.
It is well known that Iran is an enemy of the great United States. Until now, though, I have never given a fuck about its Middle Eastern babbling bullshit. If it wasn’t for the country’s endless failures and inevitable international goofs, some iota of my being might encourage me to take it somewhat seriously, but I can’t. It’s not humanly possible.
Today, however, I began to give a fuck. That shithole hit me where it hurts. Iran is about to take away dogs from the people, and you don’t just fuck with a man’s dog. These backward Neanderthals fail to understand that dogs are better than people, and they’re the worst kind of people for hating dogs.
According to a new bill proposed by Iranian legislators, Iranian citizens are essentially banned from owning dogs and face stiff punishments if they are caught.
From International Business Times:
Dog owners in Iran will be sentenced to 74 lashes if they are caught keeping the pets at home or walking them in public.
…
The proposed ban follows a series of episodes in which dog owners were fined and had their pets confiscated as the animals are considered to be ‘dirty’ under Islamic law.
The new bill, if passed, would also punish those charged with dog-related offences to pay fines up to 100 million rials (£2,363).
“Anyone who walks or plays with animals such as dogs or monkeys in public places will damage Islamic culture, as well as the hygiene and peace of others, especially women and children,” the draft law states.
Here’s a twist for you: these guys are just extreme jackasses. Dogs are apparently kosher in Islam according to Islamic Concern, a website designed to straighten out Islamic misinterpretations.
“It is NOT Haram [wrong] to touch a dog or any other animal. If the saliva of a dog touches you or any part of your clothing, then it is required of you to wash the body part touched and the item of clothing touched by the dog’s mouth or snout.”
There goes all reasoning for the gigantic pricks who seek to have this imposed on the people.
Fuck those guys. Eat dogshit, Iran. .
[via International Business Times, Islamic Concern]
Image via Zazzle
I wouldn’t mind banning pit bulls.
11 years ago at 11:17 amI think we all wouldn’t mind if you were banned.
11 years ago at 11:24 amYou are learning private. bandwagon for up votes. I can say this as an ex infantryman. “Go back to the supply room and count the sheets, pogue.
11 years ago at 11:30 amIf you were even in the military (which I doubt) you were definitely the Carl of your entire battalion.
11 years ago at 12:16 pmI have no idea what a Carl is, honestly. Is it a new “hip” term.
11 years ago at 12:22 pmI may be supply, but I do the best damned job I can do for my country. Everyone has a role to play in the military and I do mine as best as I can.
11 years ago at 1:11 pmI will give you an up vote for that. I am proud of you for standing up for yourself.
11 years ago at 1:30 pmBro he’s proud of you it’s all good now, I know that’s what you were looking for
11 years ago at 2:25 pmPogue? I think you meant POG. And I doubt you were even in. If you were you wouldn’t disrespect another MOS in front of anyone. This is coming from an infantryman
11 years ago at 4:22 amSo can we invade them now or?
11 years ago at 11:25 amDibs on the Ayatollah!
11 years ago at 12:16 pmAny country that still uses “lashes” as a legitimate punishment shouldn’t have nukes. #THANKSOBAMA
11 years ago at 3:24 pm