Jon Hamm, The Total Package

scally33312 years ago

Sources say that during the filming of the upcoming sixth season of Mad Men, Jon Hamm was required to wear underwear while shooting his scenes.

“Jon’s impressive anatomy is so distracting that the studio politely insisted on underwear,” said an AMC insider. “This season takes place in the 1960s, where the pants are very tight and leave little to the imagination.” After Google Imaging the phrase “Jon Hamm Full Frontal,” it’s safe to say that it doesn’t really matter what he is wearing, there is always going to be “little left to the imagination.”

You could see the outline of that dude’s hog through a spacesuit.

The AMC insider also said that during the first two Mad Men seasons, the AMC marketing team had to photoshop the promotional booklets to tone down his bulge. Apparently, the studio executives were a little uneasy with the show’s marketing booklet looking like the front cover of a Latin Inches magazine.

Imagine how distracting that would be on the side of a bus or building. When the promotional pictures came back the first few seasons, we had to work with them. Everyone was concerned about too much Christina Hendricks boob, but it’s Jon that has the most to show.

You know you’re a legend when your hammer is stealing the spotlight from Joan’s heavy jugs.

There really isn’t anything else to the story except that Jon Hamm has an engorged rig. I love Mad Men, and I think Jon Hamm seems like a pretty cool dude, but this story is giving me the self esteem of a pre-pubescent emo. I just caught myself saying, “Some guys have all the luck, don’t they?” Yuck. What a doosh I am, but I just can’t help thinking how nice it must be nice going through life with a jawline that could cut granite, perfectly quaffed lettuce, a dime piece on your arm, and a hammerhead shark dangling between your legs. I literally have none of that. I’ve got a chin like Jabba the Hutt, hair as thick as Charlie Brown’s, and the only place I could get laid is in a prison shower.

[via National Post]

Image via Jezebel