Kate Upton Agrees To Go To Prom With High School Nerd

Well, she agrees to go to his prom pending an opening on her schedule, which leaves her some ample wiggle room if she wants to pull the rip cord last minute and ruin this poor kid’s life.

These videos are becoming pretty common, actually. Putting the screws to a famous person in such a public manner is like fishing with dynamite — a win-win scenario. If it doesn’t catch on and no one sees it, big deal, you just ask Handjob Hannah with the lazy eye to prom. You know that one will pay off. However, if the intended famous recipient does catch wind of the video, they’re looking at some public backlash if they don’t respond in some fashion.

Jake Davidson knew what he was doing.

You’ve got to get a load of this dweeb, though, just laying it all out on the line to land a prom date with the most notorious pair of naturals in the country right now. You have to admire his spunk, really.

Davidson, of Los Angeles, CA, put together a YouTube video to ask the very famous, dangerously thick Kate Upton to his high school prom. You know young Jake’s just gotta be concealing a beach ball-sized set of plums in those trunks to pull off a stunt like this.

The kid is smart, too. Here he is trying to capitalize on the SI swimsuit cover model before she’s no longer considered to be in the upper echelon of attractive famous women due to weight gain. Just like every other girl in Jake’s graduating high school class (i.e. the reality of the freshmen 15), Kate only has about a year before she packs on an unrecoverable amount of weight and becomes about as desirable as yesterday’s newspaper.

Watch the video:

Total nerd, right? Brass balls, though.

If his plan doesn’t work, or even worse, if she doesn’t even acknowledge the video, that’s a pretty big matzo ball hanging out there (Note: the Jewish reference is purely coincidental).

Luckily for Jake, the video went viral and gained the attention of the top-heavy Upton, who tweeted the following to Jake in response:

you can call me Katie if you want! How could I turn down that video! I’ll check my schedule 😉

I’m sweating this kid so bad right now. If he’s successful in landing this prized kill and gets to nuzzle up next to those chest hammers on the dance floor, I’m going to be physically ill.

Then, in a surprising reinforcement of Kate’s soft verbal commitment to attend the prom, she called in during an interview with Jake on Today News. The little shit almost wets himself, but staying true to form, he held it together.

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Get of load of these puppies, Jake.

2013, year of the nerd.

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[via NBC Southern California]

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  1. Das Boot

    Bid. With balls like that I’m guessing the kid could get the follow-up date and take her to a college formal?

    12 years ago at 11:27 am
  2. Swagneto

    lol my little cousin told me about this since they go to the same high school, that kid’s no joke.. his parents are loaded up the ass and he drives around in a G63 AMG. Rumor has it that his parents are paying Upton $25k to “free up her schedule”

    12 years ago at 11:29 am
    1. Douglas MacArthur

      Makes sense. Since she’s getting fat, she knows her time to make a dollar is getting shorter.

      12 years ago at 11:41 am
  3. Fratlanta Brave

    Hope he doesn’t have a low budget for the meal. Kate will take his leftovers too.

    12 years ago at 11:44 am
  4. bourboncountry

    I’ve made 20 or so videos begging her to sit on my face and got no response, what the hell

    12 years ago at 2:13 pm