Let’s Get Weird
It’s Friday, spring is on its way, and alcohol is readily available in the United States of America, so let’s get weird.
I feel a little bad for blasting Kramer in last week’s LGW, so for that, I’m sorry, Kramer. You got absolutely torched in the comments. I mean just slaughtered. You might be dead. I hope you’re not dead, but you might be dead. I was just trying to help a brother out, but damn. These guys went IN on you. Deserved? I don’t know, man.
Be on the lookout for our annual Spring Break Photo and Video Contest. The announcement editorial is coming soon but in meantime go ahead and follow the newly created @tfmspringbreak Instagram account and wait for the best spring break-themed videos and pictures on the planet to start rolling in. Prizes will be given out to numerous winners.
What are we doing this weekend? Golf is in my future. And drinking. That’s pretty much it.
Oh yeah, and spring break is here.
Where’s our TFM bracket?
8 years ago at 1:36 pmA man opened his front door and found a snail on his porch. He picked it up and threw it across the street. A year later the man opened his front door and found the same snail on his porch. The snail looked up and said, “What the heck was THAT all about?” Ha ha I’m going to put that on Facebook!
8 years ago at 1:36 pmIs it cause the snail was pissed but just took a long time to get bak to the dude’s house to ask about it? I don’t get the real punch line.
8 years ago at 1:56 pmA man came up onto the deck of his boat and found a shark on deck. The man gather up the shark and pitched him overboard. Fifteen minutes later, the man came up on deck again and found the same shark on deck. The shark looked up and said, “What the heck was THAT all about?” Then he bit the man’s head off and swallowed it. Because he’s a shark. Ha ha I need to stop drinking cranberry juice and vodka!
8 years ago at 2:09 pmI fell down Air Force One’s stairs twice.
8 years ago at 1:38 pmI hope you said, “PARDON me!”
8 years ago at 1:40 pmNow that should go on Facebook
8 years ago at 1:41 pmThose must have been interesting TRIPS!
8 years ago at 1:43 pmMy wife and First Lady Betty Ford is a full blown Alcoholic and drug addict too.
8 years ago at 2:52 pmWhat a coincidence! There’s a clinic for alcoholics and drug addicts called the Betty Ford Clinic! Maybe your wife could get a discount there!
8 years ago at 3:06 pmShe founded it, I told her I could just pardon her for her drug crimes but she was drunk and high when I said it.
8 years ago at 3:09 pmThe guys who made the spin off accounts of thevaginator should be balled on the principle of trying way too hard.
8 years ago at 1:43 pmI’m sitting on a couch in my underwear, poking my phone with my thumbs. If I tried any less I’d be comatose.
8 years ago at 1:47 pmHow did someone who’s got life so figured out end up with such a shitbird of a kid?
8 years ago at 8:15 pmAny other big Thor fans out there? Heard the new movie this time around is gonna have “buddy road trip” aspects with the hulk.
8 years ago at 1:55 pmI feel like you’d be more of a Poseidon fan, Sharky
8 years ago at 2:08 pmHe’s not in the marvel movies which is why I’m mainly talking about. But Yeah. in general I am a fan.
8 years ago at 4:34 pmupdate on Dorns Bachelorette application?
8 years ago at 1:58 pmThe people deserve transparency
8 years ago at 2:05 pmWho the fuck gave thevaginator a bid?
8 years ago at 2:20 pmA fraternity that you could never get into you fucking goober
8 years ago at 3:57 pmSo…..the super gay fraternity?
8 years ago at 3:48 pmThe fraternity that would never bid losers like you
8 years ago at 12:31 amBoy, don’t be any more of a shithead than you already are.
8 years ago at 2:10 pmthevaginator was conceived through a glory hole in a Knoxville truck stop, raised in a trailer park in a single-wide, and never graduated high school because he was caught trying to suck himself off. No bid.
8 years ago at 4:42 pmHe’s still a rushee. Let’s keep things that way.
8 years ago at 6:41 pmDoes anyone have any good stories about visiting chapters from other schools?
8 years ago at 3:06 pmMost seemed impressed with our chapter when they were the ones visiting but I haven’t been to many other chapters myself.
I’ve always been big into rituals. I’ve always wanted to attend some other chapters initiations just to spectate and see what if anything they do different.
8 years ago at 6:10 pmFrom my experience nobody has great stories visiting other chapters because you’re always the “weird” guy from another chapter and the hosts feel obliged to make you feel welcome.
8 years ago at 8:06 pmWent to our Binghamton chapter my (true) senior year expecting nothing. Got in the car with my brothers travelling there on a whim at like noon. Fast forward to God knows what hour of the morning, my one brother finds me hunched over a toilet in the house puking violently and bleeding pretty badly out of my nose as well. Evidently I’d spent the evening mixing it up with some blow, Xanax, weed, and obviously a shit ton of booze. Per his account, I just looked up at him, eyes barely open and asked if he’d stay with me for a minute to, “make sure I don’t die.” Looking back I’m pretty shocked/glad I didn’t. Cold as shit up there but they know how to throw a good party.
8 years ago at 11:28 pmExcuse my question, but when you say “true” senior year, do you mean the first one or the one after which you graduated? Asking as a fellow victory-lapper.
8 years ago at 6:35 pmMy idiot cousin is getting showered with praise after being back to a month of no meth or heroin for how strong and brave and inspiring she is.
Meanwhile I go two formals, New Year’s Eve and a birthday without drunkenly pissing myself and nobody bats an eye.
Double standards, I tell ya.
8 years ago at 3:15 pmI’m proud.
8 years ago at 8:14 pmSame
8 years ago at 10:30 pmSometimes people just need to hear things, doesn’t mean it’s true or it’s just not relative in the way you might expect
8 years ago at 6:20 pmMy cousin has a drug problem too, and I tried to help him out of it by hazing him when I was a newly initiated active. He now has a chip on his shoulder and occasionally tries to fight me, but honestly I am proud of him because he got a job, bought a jeep, and began taking care of a rescue dog. Tough love works.
8 years ago at 6:38 pmThat’s like going to jail and Converting to Islam… But for white people
8 years ago at 3:43 pmGoing to Fort Lauderdale for spring break. Anybody who’s been down there/lives eat there and know anything about the bar scene?
8 years ago at 3:20 pmFt. Lauderdale killed Spring Break a long time ago. No alcohol on beaches, parking is a nightmare and it’s still full of tourists. There is a Fat Tuesday, that overlooks the beach along with a Lulu’s bait shack where you buy fruity, rum and tequila filled fishbowls. Plenty of other beachy restaurants with huge margaritas and seafood that line A1A right across the street from the beach. Hardrock Hotel and Casino for all of your gambling needs (also a few bars there) and if you feel like making an ass of yourself in front of rich people there’s always Yolo’s.
8 years ago at 3:39 pmPretty much ^
8 years ago at 9:05 pm