Let’s Get Weird: May 26
It’s Friday, you don’t have any responsibilities, and alcohol is readily available in the United States of America, so let’s get weird.
Let’s talk music today. What do you guys listen to? As a conservative white guy in his 30s, it surprises some people that I listen to mostly rap. It’s not all I listen to, but it’s probably 80% of it. I mix in some Texas Country/Red Dirt and some pop music, but I’m a rap guy. Always have been. Below is a public playlist I put together on Spotify. If you’re into rap, subscribe to it.
If you guys aren’t getting our newsletter, TFM Daily Minutes, you should start. It’s a perfect snapshot of the prior day’s content. It includes a couple quick summaries of the day’s news stories, Babe of the Day, the best pictures and videos from our Instagram feed, and links to our podcasts. Some throwback shit, too.
What are we getting into this weekend?
I think all the TFM commenters should get together and drink one time. I feel like you guys would be good people to get drunk with
8 years ago at 2:51 pmYeah can’t wait for vaginator to roofie the jungle juice and for BayBro to shit himself
8 years ago at 2:56 pm75% of the users on this site probably lay somewhere on the spectrum, but there are a few I wouldn’t mind drinking with
8 years ago at 3:02 pmI can only imagine the horrors I’d see on a night drinking with Frabst
8 years ago at 3:35 pmWould lead to a hell of a story.
8 years ago at 8:57 pmI’d be curious to see if State Street Steve is actually the homeless bum living under a bridge with a callus-covered dick, that I picture him to be. Either way I’d have a beer with him and some of the rest of you.
8 years ago at 4:57 pmId like to meet my dad ^
8 years ago at 8:32 pmJust make sure you leave your bitch of a mother at home.
8 years ago at 11:55 pm75% of the users on this site are not old enough to be admitted into a bar let alone purchase alcohol
8 years ago at 1:08 amAnother way of saying 25% are, be positive.
8 years ago at 9:25 amYeah man, would love to have a beer with all my bros on here
8 years ago at 11:49 amI may be one of the most hated fuckers here but I can hold my own.
8 years ago at 3:44 pmIt’s becoming self-aware.
8 years ago at 4:18 pmI don’t shit myself anymore
8 years ago at 8:50 pmGood for you, BayBro! Do you still wear your Pull-Ups?
8 years ago at 8:56 pmOrganize it
8 years ago at 3:01 pmA TFM commenters golf tournament would be ideal to do this
8 years ago at 3:12 pmCome down to New Orleans. We have the nightlife, a brand new pro-level golf course, and a food festival every weekend during the summer. We can set something up…
8 years ago at 3:26 pmCity park isn’t a pro level course.
8 years ago at 4:38 pmThey just redid the whole thing. It’s a pro-caliber course and are expected to host the Zurich and possibly some Tour tourneys in the next few years
8 years ago at 5:14 pmThe Zurich Classic already happened. Cameron Smith and Jonas Blixt won. I would personally love to see that golf course.
8 years ago at 6:10 pmYou had me at “food.”
8 years ago at 5:01 pmThis would be a great name for a shitty infomercial product
8 years ago at 4:20 pmRiverside in Austin would be the only place around town that would take such a rowdy bunch of gentlemen. They advertise as a cooler friendly course, and would be easy to get for a day.
But I’m not organizing shit
8 years ago at 4:48 pm@bach yeah when I emailed Dorno last month about organizing a golf scramble he told me the same thing. I mean I would be down but I don’t know any of you guys personally and I’m sure as hell not putting any form of contact info on here. I do play Xbox live with Lou from time to time so if any of you like to nerd out once in a while we can try to plan something. GirthBrooks0116
8 years ago at 9:28 amAfter my wife left me I have a lot of time on my hands. I’m a professional dude. I’ll organize it.
8 years ago at 9:27 amAs long as the worlds best clothes hanger dodger isn’t there (mcfrat), count Pax in. – Pax out
8 years ago at 3:04 pmSounds like a spectrum disorder to me, am I right?
8 years ago at 4:51 pmI’ll supply the beverages
8 years ago at 3:13 pmCan I go?
8 years ago at 3:15 pmSearch TFM Day Rage
8 years ago at 3:19 pmI’ll take that challenge. you no match for the stif-man.
8 years ago at 3:27 pmThrowing back drinks with Richdaddybowtiefrat would make for an interesting night.
8 years ago at 3:37 pmIf it’s in Texas or Louisinna I’m down.
8 years ago at 3:54 pmIf this ever happens, a list should be made so none of the cancer, aids, and autism, is allowed in
8 years ago at 4:03 pmWouldn’t mind meeting SteveHoltOnDrugs honestly.
8 years ago at 4:18 pmOr the grandex guys.
Set it up
8 years ago at 4:28 pmDid some one say drinking? *Belch*
8 years ago at 4:46 pmI wouldn’t mind meeting AndrewsMomsAss. I’d have to renew my Viagra prescription.
8 years ago at 4:46 pmWith respect to the fact that I am on the spectrum and choose not to drink alcohol, I’d like to be included for the golf, cigars, and camaraderie.
8 years ago at 4:56 pmCan we just make sure Gerald Ford and the other parody fucktards don’t get in?
8 years ago at 5:41 pm…
8 years ago at 6:10 pmCan I come? I was hoping to meet a nice young man to clean my pool!
8 years ago at 6:57 pmAwesome name YourSister69. Bet you’d be a lot of fun to hang out with.
8 years ago at 11:43 pmFuck yourself kid, dorno changed it. It used to be DornsDirtyMom
8 years ago at 1:19 pmWhatever you say, douchebag. Get back to us after you graduate high school.
8 years ago at 6:50 amAndrewsMomsAss you are absolutely welcome to join us!
8 years ago at 7:07 amYou sound like the boners at Passages of Malibu. God you’re a pussy. – Pax out
8 years ago at 7:04 pmAnother failed parody account. Helen Keller was the last parody account that was funny.
8 years ago at 3:51 amAnd whatever happened to Fuck Tuco69? My favorite troll account.
8 years ago at 4:06 amAm I a parody account?
8 years ago at 1:27 pmA Parody Account takes the name of a real person, or a character in TV, movies, etc, and comments in the voice of that person. I’d classify SharkweekTFM as a Gimmick Account. Your gimmick is that you’re a shark, but you’re not any specific shark. If you called yourself Jaws or Left Shark, and tried to comment in some weird way representative of that shark, you’d be a Parody Account. The Troll Account tries to inspire an indignant response in other users. Trolling can be fun in small doses, and most troll are probably nice guys just having some harmless fun. I used to assume thevaginator was probably a normal guy having fun, and I had a lot of fun sparring with him. But to sustain that act over 7 months, with all the threats of violence and forced sex with women, I think he must be an actual shitstain in real life.
8 years ago at 9:46 amYeah that all sounds about right.
8 years ago at 11:14 amTry being less of a goober kid
8 years ago at 8:59 pmAll of those are good points. I want to add a sidebar to your “parody” definition because I love golf and wanted to comment with a golf-themed account, and chose to play on Fred Couples’s name mostly because he’s one of the true gentlemen in the sport. My account is not actually representative of his celebrity, it’s just a name as a cue.
8 years ago at 7:24 pmI can scoop Helen Keller TFM, only god knows what would happen with that crazy bitch behind the wheel
8 years ago at 7:32 pmWhy don’t we do something for the College World Series? Get a TFM tent in Omaha so we can get hammered and watch our schools partake in America’s pastime.
8 years ago at 7:37 pmI’m down for tailgating Omaha.
8 years ago at 9:01 pmI would drink with about five of you. Mostly Shark Week. That guy is funny. And four others are too.
8 years ago at 8:55 pm“Instead of drinking you should spend your time trying to put together a descent playlist.” – my son
8 years ago at 9:07 pmGood girl. Keep on dancin
8 years ago at 9:37 pmAccording to your own definition, the person who starts the thread is pulling the strings and the person who replies is dancing. Therefore, by your own definition, it is you who is dancing. About what I would expect from someone raised in North Carolina.
8 years ago at 1:52 pmYou’re never gonna have the balls to show up to the Pike house are you?
8 years ago at 4:34 pmEzekiel 23:33
8 years ago at 11:10 amDrunkenness and anguish will fill you, for your cup is filled to the brim with distress and desolation, the same cup your sister Samaria drank.
8 years ago at 4:21 pmEz 23:33
Karl…
8 years ago at 9:08 pm🙂
8 years ago at 9:57 pmDo you clean pools, Karl?
8 years ago at 10:07 pmShould do it somewhere in Canada like Mtl or Toronto
8 years ago at 9:51 amNah.
8 years ago at 10:07 amSorry
8 years ago at 10:57 pmRandom question: you ever seen a Canadian show called Letterkenny?
8 years ago at 10:58 pmNah m8 soaree
8 years ago at 4:22 pmAww, bud.
8 years ago at 12:52 amI do! And I take several types of payment: cash, credit, and “other.”
8 years ago at 1:28 pmI’m sure you’d do an excellent job of cleaning her pool since you’d be, you know, IN the pool.
8 years ago at 9:48 amAnd by “other” I assume you mean fish and small mammals.
8 years ago at 9:50 amI mean wet beej’s.
8 years ago at 11:15 amI don’t like the taste of fish!
8 years ago at 3:25 pmI do 😉
8 years ago at 4:53 pmThen you should suck your own dick.
8 years ago at 5:24 amHey if I could I’m not saying I wouldn’t.
8 years ago at 4:23 pmBut I bet Andrews mom has a fishy spot of her own 😉
8 years ago at 4:23 pmI’m blocking you on Fishbook!
8 years ago at 4:28 pm🙁
8 years ago at 9:25 pmOnly if the victims of the Great Blackball Massacre of 2014 are invited.
8 years ago at 11:18 amYeah i dislike the vast majority of you but id love to fuck up some pizza and brews with boosh and dan
8 years ago at 11:23 amShut up meg.
8 years ago at 11:41 amSign me up for this shit show
8 years ago at 2:33 pmCan I see your boobs?
8 years ago at 12:20 pmDillion, I hate you but you listen to some fire. Thought you stole my playlist for a sec
8 years ago at 3:30 pmYou don’t hate Dildo Baggins
8 years ago at 3:55 pmEven though you used insult to hide behind your insecurities the other day and called me a “C commenter” (we all know that’s not true), that’s a pretty good playlist
8 years ago at 3:30 pmNow that AliExpress went to shit, where is the best place to buy jerseys online?
8 years ago at 3:34 pmWhat happened to Ali express?
8 years ago at 4:01 pmNbashop.com poor
8 years ago at 4:46 pmI recently found out that this girl I dated in high school is mildly autistic, like diagnosed by a professional autistic. It definitely explains a lot though. Life is weird, gentlemen.
8 years ago at 3:34 pmWait wait wait, so another autistic diagnosed your ex with autism? How does one become a professional autistic?
8 years ago at 4:20 pmHey, It’s 2017 so anything is possible. Also I was battling the end of a Scotch hangover when I wrote that.
8 years ago at 5:10 pmA professional autistic?
8 years ago at 4:30 pmObviously nobody could tell for a long time so you shouldn’t feel bad unless you ever complained to someone “gah, my girlfriend is so retarded…” and proceeded to explain something she did that you didn’t like.
Well, I was back home recently and went to a house party with some old friends and she ended up being there. Someone mentioned something about autism, I started laughing and she announced to everyone that she had been diagnosed as mildly autistic but it didn’t even seem to register with her that I had laughed about autism. I almost felt bad about that.
8 years ago at 5:09 pmY’all would’ve been perfect
8 years ago at 3:16 pmGenerally a whiskey guy, but thinking about changing up my drink of choice for the summer. Any suggestions?
8 years ago at 3:53 pmGin & Tonic or Gin Gimlet
8 years ago at 3:57 pmGin, lime, tonic, pinch of powdered sugar.
8 years ago at 4:17 pmOne would think that powdered sugar isn’t easy to store under the sea.
8 years ago at 8:23 amIt is indeed quite hard. I don’t keep mine under water.
8 years ago at 1:29 pmIf you normally just drink it neat, go with whiskey sours for the summer. Delicious, refreshing, and they still have what you’re looking for in whiskey
8 years ago at 3:59 pmVodka sodas can also be a fun time
8 years ago at 4:03 pmHand grenades.
8 years ago at 4:05 pmIf you haven’t tried Llanllyr Source Mixers, you’re missing out. New company out to take down fevertree. The Fiery Ginger Beer is killer for any type of Mule
8 years ago at 4:12 pmRanch Water – 100% Agave Tequila, Fresh Lime, Mineral Water
8 years ago at 4:29 pmBlue motherfucker is my go-to
8 years ago at 4:34 pmCan’t go wrong with a John Daly on the links or by the pool
8 years ago at 5:03 pmWhat kinda whiskey we talking about here?
8 years ago at 3:41 amI’m a simple man. Bottle of jack does the job for me, most nights
8 years ago at 8:30 amWait, you’re not in the “Jack Daniels is bourbon” camp are you?
8 years ago at 4:23 pmJack is NOT bourbon
8 years ago at 10:55 pmI really like mojitos, kinda girly but perfect for summer. If thats too “girly” for you then like the man said, whiskey sours.
8 years ago at 9:03 amI didn’t see it mentioned all ready, but whiskey with a splash of ginger is perfect over the summer
8 years ago at 3:35 pmHendricks, soda, squeeze of lime. Keep it simple. If you’re ballin, pick up a bottle of elderflower cordial and add a splash.
8 years ago at 3:12 pmGrilling and drinking beer is the only way to go. May throw in some golf if tee times are still available.
8 years ago at 4:34 pmI got a riddle for you boys. A boy and his father are driving down the road and get into a car accident. Two ambulances come, and take the boy, and his dad, to different hospitals, okay? Doctor comes into the operating room and says, “I can’t operate on this boy. He’s my son.” Now how is that possible?
8 years ago at 4:48 pmDoctor could be the grandfather looking at the father or the “father” in the car was a catholic priest and not the younger boy’s biological father.
8 years ago at 5:19 pmIt’s a family riddle, Earl. You gotta think clean thoughts.
8 years ago at 9:10 pmDoctor is the boy’s mother. Next.
8 years ago at 9:04 pmWomen can’t be surgeons. Their brains aren’t big enough
8 years ago at 9:11 pmNever get a vasectomy from a urologist with PMS.
8 years ago at 9:18 pmThe dads gay.
8 years ago at 11:59 amFuck you dorno
8 years ago at 5:38 pmSnappa or beer die?
8 years ago at 5:40 pm