Mailbag: Internet Tough Guy Calls Me Out, Falls Way Short
I just got called out. Some internet tough guy, whose name I should post but will refrain from doing since I’m an awesome guy, emailed me a video of his attempt at what has so flatteringly been dubbed “The Dorn Skeet Shot” by the internet. I posted my version to Vine on New Year’s Eve, then uploaded a second angle to YouTube soon after, including some sexy slow-mo action that gets the people going.
In my video, I used a 57-degree Cleveland wedge to hit a flop shot. After I struck the ball cleanly and hit a beautiful, high-arching flop, I took a quick peek to spot the Titleist Pro V1 against the rich blue of the Texas sky so I’d know where to meet it with my eyes once I was ready to aim and fire. My buddy Eugene then handed me my 12-gauge after I nonchalantly tossed the wedge aside and looked back up to find the ball soaring through the air. Impossibly, I found my footing on the terribly uneven terrain, aimed, and shot it right out of the sky. Splashed it. Eugene went crazy. It was my first attempt. I was five cold ones deep.
Here it is:
Well, I have my first Dorn Skeet Shot challenger. In an emergency Mailbag, I put it to the people to decide who did it best: me or internet tough guy. Here’s the email I received:
Tell Dorn that this shits on his skeet golf shooting video.
And here’s his version:
Let’s compare, shall we?
• He hit the ball and someone else shot it for him… Uh, cool story, dude. That looked tough. Did they even hit it? Doubt it.
• His swing isn’t all that good. Makes me look like ’99 Tiger.
• Where are the theatrics? Where’s the yelling? Where’s the slow-mo? Where’s the club toss? Where’s Eugene? You didn’t even have a Eugene.
• “Someone’s gonna die” could be heard at the start of my shit. No one said anything cool for your stupid video.
You get major points for setting, though. I don’t know where this was filmed, but that’s some fine scenery there. Yeah, so that’s literally the only thing this video has over mine.
Do we need to put it to a vote, or can we just shut the book on this one? Let’s shut it. Sorry for wasting everyone’s time.
Bacon hit it, SFPL shot at it and Allen filmed it. #TeamDorn
11 years ago at 3:18 pmYou are such a try hard Dorn.
11 years ago at 3:18 pmAnd the name PowerPoint isn’t being a try hard?
11 years ago at 3:32 pmI thought we were on the same team.
11 years ago at 7:51 pm“Please TFM community look how much better I am at things and stuff than people who hurt my feelings online.” – dorn
11 years ago at 3:19 pm^ this
11 years ago at 3:21 pmHey I think there’s a button for that
11 years ago at 4:44 pm^ this
11 years ago at 9:51 pmFuck Mark May
11 years ago at 12:00 pmI expected the ‘Dorn Skeet Shot’ to involve much younger fellows…
11 years ago at 3:22 pmAnother “Dorn is a pedophile” joke. how original. please go choke on a rock
11 years ago at 7:02 pmIt’s not a joke
11 years ago at 7:20 pmWho do you think you are? Please go run very quickly into a knife.
11 years ago at 10:32 amMarion for jiffy lube guy to be impeached from exec.
11 years ago at 1:24 pmMotion. Fuck. Autocorrect. Fucker. Shit
11 years ago at 1:24 pmjiffy lube guy is a legend. Maybe you should sit out the next few plays
11 years ago at 5:10 pmGet at me you retard
11 years ago at 4:29 pmHey look^ another boy riding dorns dick
11 years ago at 6:03 pmThe only way Try Hard’s video comes close, is our camera man, J.R., not giving a fuck about that guy to the left.
11 years ago at 10:17 pmNever saw that vid before but pretty fucking frat Dorny. Pretty fucking frat.
11 years ago at 3:22 pmRight on, Sausagestroker69
11 years ago at 3:24 pmSeriously just fuck yourself
11 years ago at 3:26 pmfuck yeah, man
11 years ago at 3:35 pm#TYBD
11 years ago at 3:25 pmFuckin told
11 years ago at 3:28 pmDo less Dorn, do less.
11 years ago at 3:37 pmprops to you, Dorn, for taking the shot but they both suck
11 years ago at 3:42 pm