Map Of The Lamest Party Schools In The Nation Will Make You Glad You Don’t Go There
The map is actually called the “The Tamest Party Schools In The Nation,” but let’s call it what it really is: the lamest. The only time you’d find me on one of these campuses would be if I stumbled upon it drunkenly, only to piss on the grass while shouting obscenities at the rent-a-cops. While we’re all loading up on kegs for the return to the fraternity houses and our favorite bars, these kids are actually buying books and probably a ton of pocket protectors. Take a look at the map for yourself.
After going through the list, I can only name two schools: Wyoming and BYU. You would think that Wyoming would be a college where all they do is drink. Is there anything else to do there? I’ve literally lived in Texas all my life and never once have I heard of Southwestern Assemblies of God University. I honestly thought it was made up, like in “Accepted.” You learn something new every day, huh?
I can imagine Greek life at these schools is a lot like that fraternity that has the lame parties. During rush, these guys pitched their parties as the greatest ones on campus, but the photo and video evidence always proves they’re a bunch of sausage fests. Just as their party spiels didn’t help with recruiting new members, this map won’t do much good for colleges trying to bring in top-tier talent. So, cheers to all those who go to a school that isn’t on this list. As Robert Earl Keen says, “The road goes on forever, and the party never ends.”
[via E College Finder]
What do you expect from a school run by virgins wearing costumes from the dark ages?
10 years ago at 10:05 amAt Asbury, we don’t have rent a cops. In fact, we hardly have any security officers. You know why? Because we’re not a bunch of idiots who get drunk and do stupid things we’ll regret and get arrested for. I just finished my time at Asbury and I’m proud to have spent college in a community of good people who care about and support each other while being stretched to grow to full potential (Employers respect that btw). Asbury helped me to excel in all aspects of life because I got more than liver damage in college.
10 years ago at 10:42 amMost of these schools don’t have Greek systems because they’re Christian schools. Something to do with the Romans killing Jesus, so they hate Greeks. Doesn’t make a lot of sense, but neither does Christianity
10 years ago at 1:46 pmExcept that lots of Fraternities are based in Christianity (sigma chi, pi kappa phi)
Nice try tho
10 years ago at 11:47 amI just wanted to say that I actually graduated from Southwestern Assemblies of God University and while it wasn’t a party school we had plenty of fun (sometimes…or rather….usually under the radar). I will however note that we were also buying books (no pocket protectors….sorry).
10 years ago at 4:57 pmFyi, college is for education, not parties. So the article is bogus. And who chooses a school based on the parties it has? What a waste of money. Go to college and party the whole time and then not remember a dang thing about it because you were too wasted. Just stupid.
10 years ago at 12:18 amYou weren’t given a bid?
10 years ago at 11:21 pmThe Wisconsin college. Alverno, my alma mater. That’s a women’s college about a mile and half from Miller Park. I’m fairly certain frat idiots would love to stumble upon it, drunk or otherwise. Just wondering though was any research put into this or did you just pick at random, colleges with somewhat restrictive drinking rules because I can think of other Wisconsin colleges I would call lame. I mean why don’t you just name Kaplan “University” in every state and call it a day?
10 years ago at 9:03 amAs someone who went to the University of Maryland, I have to throw in that UMUC is located right off our campus. So yeah, technically it is a lame mostly online school, but most of its students who actually live in the area just party at UMD. I guess that doesn’t make it too bad…
10 years ago at 11:26 am[…] Total Frat Move recently published a map of the lamest party schools in each state. [Map Of The Lamest Party Schools In The Nation Will Make You Glad You Don’t Go There] […]
10 years ago at 12:34 pmAm I the only one who’s never heard of about 44 of those schools?
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