Masters Week: It’s Finally Here
14 years ago

Finally, the pregame is over, and Masters week 2011 is upon us. It is, indeed, a tradition unlike any other. If you skipped class today and watched the Par 3 Contest, then you’re probably already walking around with a visor and a half chub. If you can’t avoid work this week, you don’t have to miss the action. You can stream the entire tournament on Masters.com, or use The Masters Golf Tournament iPhone app if necessary.

As we all know, Augusta National is a club rich with history, as well as stories of great triumph and defeat. Though there are women on the membership waiting list (to appease the public), no woman has ever been admitted. As former chairman of the club “Hootie” Johnson once said, “Our membership is single gender just as many other organizations and clubs all across America. These would include junior Leagues, sororities, fraternities, Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts, and countless others. And we all have a moral and legal right to organize our clubs the way we wish.” FaF. So while you watch this week, kick back and enjoy the scenery knowing full well no woman has tarnished this beautiful piece of earth with her pink golf balls and 30-yard worm burners. While you’re at it, have the sorosty fix you up an Arnold Palmer (or make it a John Daly). When she brings it say, “Hey, thanks sweetheart, but you’ll never step foot on a golf course with me,” just to be sure you’re on the same page.

Before you place your bets on this year’s tournament, consider your choices carefully. We want that green jacket to stay here in the USA, not going overseas. Betting against America is just like rooting against America. Here are some current odds for the tournament on Sportsbook.com:

  • Phil Mickelson 11/2
  • Tiger Woods 8/1
  • Nick Watney 15/1
  • Lee Westwood 15/1
  • Martin Kaymer 20/1
  • Bubba Watson 20/1
  • Aaron Baddeley 20/1
  • Rory McIlroy 20/1
  • Dustin Johnson 20/1
  • Hunter Mahan 25/1
  • Matt Kuchar 25/1
  • Luke Donald 25/1
  • Anthony Kim 30/1

You’ll notice we didn’t post Rickie Fowler’s odds. That’s because he’s a fucking GDI:

Great clip of Phil:

  2. old line state

    i sat with a disappointed look on my face as i watched the fowler video, but i have to admit, i smiled a little at the end when the caddy was raking the trap.

    14 years ago at 11:45 pm
    1. booze haze slam

      haha he was like scoops! he wanted to say get the fuck outta here! haha classic

      14 years ago at 8:25 pm
  6. masterfrat

    I think Phil wants it the most. His performance at the Shell Open showed his intent.

    14 years ago at 8:35 am
  7. BubbaFratson

    Rickie may be a GDI but I’d still rather see him win over any european or asian. We can all agree he dresses like a geed, but if Puma offered me millions just to wear bright colors and a skater hat, I can’t say I’d turn them down.

    14 years ago at 5:30 pm
    2. Fratbrink

      All puma want is their name on his clothes, this could be on a tour visor and regular shirts and slacks. His sponsorship is no excuse for the miserable gdi hat.

      14 years ago at 9:14 am
  8. Fratist

    why the fucks the fowler gotta be so geed? honestly he can play some great golf but the Puma attire has got to go and those damn puka shells.

    14 years ago at 6:38 pm
  10. fratTP

    Everyone but Bubba is GDI as shit on this list so you might as well put fowlers.. and besides rickies dressing hes faf… golf, money, fishing, and woman. (just like tiger) I hate GDI’s but as an actual golfer unlike most of you who think you play golf, the kids a stick

    14 years ago at 9:35 am
    1. Frat Ryan

      No one is denying he is a very skilled golfer. He would kick everyone here’s ass up and down the course. But he is a geed so we hate him.

      14 years ago at 9:42 am
  11. General Lee1861

    Rooting for Fred Couples. I’m not rooting for a foreigner(INCLUDES TIGER WOODS). Never have and never will.

    14 years ago at 2:06 pm