Meet The Most Ridiculous Kid On Instagram

Dillon Cheverere12 years ago

In the above photo is the kid behind the Instagram account itslavishbitch. Lavish is shown filling a toilet bowl with San Pellegrino sparkling water, because why not? Lavish doesn’t like shitting in regular toilet water. It’s beneath him, and God forbid some tap water splash up against his taint. That’s for poors only. You see, Lavish is rich, really rich, and he wants all you peasants to know about it.

A few other things you should know about Lavish, as evidenced by his Instagram account:

– He drives a Rolls Royce, and a Maserati, and maybe a Bentley, too.
– He enjoys Louis Vuitton products. A lot.
– He carries around quite a bit of cash.
– He has not one, but two, American Express black cards.
– He has about six iPhones, with the unreleased iOS 7.
– He enjoys all Apple products in general.
– He has many expensive watches.
– He has a lot of expensive jewelry.
– The word “peasant” is featured in his vocabulary.
– He seems to really enjoy making fun of and degrading less fortunate people, and does so regularly.

One of those people is Kim Kardashian, who, the last time I checked, is pretty successful financially.

Aside from some atrocious grammar and unnecessary redundancy, Lavish makes some valid points. $63 million in the bank and only a few foreign cars? That’s straight peasant shit. I don’t support bringing her deceased father into the mix, though. That was in poor taste, but the rest of it, spot on.

Lavish is no one-trick pony, though. Now sure, he seems to spend quite a bit of time flaunting his money, jewelry, clothing, cars, etc., while simultaneously ripping on people that he perceives as commoners, which is basically everyone, but the dude is also rather philanthropic. Well, he’s philanthropic in the sense that he gives away large sums of money to his peasant followers after he essentially makes them beg for it.

He’s given away 15k, 20k, and most recently, 60k.

From Instagram:

Lavish is giving away 60K all in cash. That’s more than yo life’s earnings. Rules: Like this picture, follow me, and comment what you would do with the money and then tag a friend in the contest. Giveaway ends April 23, 2013. Winner will be chosen completely at random. Winner will be given cash personally . I can send money to you in another way upon request. If you live in Africa, Asia, or Antarctica you are not applicable for this. On March 25, 2012 go to YouTube.com/itslavishbitch for more info. So begin begging peasants.

It would appear he’s a man of his word.

I can’t confirm that the cash found its way to the lucky Instagrammer, but a quick look at @theredwood_’s Twitter account suggests it did. Another cash giveaway stunt Lavish pulled, and a personal favorite of mine, is when he tied four grand in cash to a bundle of ballons, then let it go into the San Francisco sky.

Lavish’s real name is unknown, I think. With the vast attention he’s getting, and over-the-top absurdity of his persona, many internet sleuths have sought to uncover his real identity. His name is thought to be Param Sharma, although the couple websites I’ve found that mention this name are even uncertain if that’s accurate. The mystique only adds to the story, if you ask me.

Do you enjoy this kid’s cockiness as much as I do, or are you a peasant/hater? He’s so lavish it’s not even funny.

At least this website seems to be convinced anyway. I’m not entirely sure yet, mainly because the photos appear to be original and authentic, but they present some solid evidence.

Either way, itslavishbitch is a must follow.

[via Instagram]