National Signing Day: The Winners and Losers
For college football enthusiasts the season doesn’t truly end until the first Wednesday of February. National Signing Day is exciting as balls for guys like us. We get a ground floor perspective of the guys that will be college football stars for the next several years. Some of us enjoy it more than others though. Take TFM’s own “Bacon” for example. This pile of fuck has been hooting and hollering all morning up and down the TFM Headquarters hallways about Mizzou landing the #1 player in the nation. I wonder if Bacon has seen what the rest of Missouri’s class looks like though. Don’t worry, I’ll fill him in.
I’ve been working my sources and pounding the pavement all day to bring you assholes some exclusive Signing Day coverage. Let’s check out National Signing Day’s winners and losers.
Winners
Alabama
Sitting at the front of my “What the fuck else is new?” file we find the University of Alabama recruiting class. I’m tired of giving the Nicktator so much damn credit, but he keeps giving me every reason to. Saban raped the hopes and dreams of LSU in the title game, stole their top recruiting target in front of a national audience, and now they have locked up the top recruiting class in the country. Nice month for Saban and Bama fans.
I hope you’re not holding your breath waiting for Bama to suck any time soon. Spoiled assholes.
USC
Southern California is still hindered by scolly limits handed down by the NCAA from the Reggie Bush fiasco. That’s not slowing down Coach Lane Kiffin, though. USC has secured the highest average star rating in the country at 4.07 per commitment. That’s just crazy talk. With the scholarship limits they have had to be more selective, and Kiff accomplished that. Job well done.
Kiffin is still a shady, devious, sly son of a bitch, but the man can flat recruit. With their bowl ban expiring after the 2011 season, look for USC to be back in the national picture in 2012.
Texas
Also dipping into LSU’s backyard (more on them later) is the Texas Longhorns. I don’t know how Mack spun back to back shitty to sub-par football seasons into back to back ridiculous recruiting classes, but the man is a recruiting boss. Austin, TX isn’t a tough sell either.
The headliner of this blue chip-laden class is running back Johnathan Gray, who accumulated something like 1,278 touchdowns in his high school career. Someone might have to check my math on that, but the point stands. The kid is electric. Mack is trying to get this program back to the top, and this 2012 class will be a vital piece to that journey.
Ohio State
Urban Meyer is wasting no time re-establishing himself as one of the best recruiters in the nation. A couple quick phone calls (most likely impermissible) landed him a couple 5-stars right after landing his new coaching gig.
Valuing and selling recruits on family environment, competition and winning while shunning honesty are just a few of Urban’s tactics, and he already has them working in Columbus. It’s not tough to predict that he’ll have Ohio State back in the national title hunt very soon.
Other winners: Florida State, Miami, Stanford, Michigan, Florida
Losers
LSU
Alabama not only whipped them in the natty, they apparently beat the Torshiro Davis out of them too. Davis, one of the region’s top DE prospects, switched his commitment from LSU to Texas today. LSU typically builds a proverbial wall around Louisiana when it comes to recruiting. Letting guys slip out of state is a rarity, and they let the top 4 in-state guys get away. One of those was Landon Collins, the #1 safety in the country. He chose Alabama live on ESPN in one of the most awkward TV moments you’ll see, as his mother was adamant in her preference for LSU.
Another oddity is that LSU didn’t sign a single kid from inside the Rivals top 100. That’s not something we’ve been used to seeing in recent years. All this happens after an SEC title and a title game appearance. Weird shit.
Missouri
“Alright, Dorn clearly doesn’t follow recruiting. Mizzou just landed DGB!”
Yeah, but that’s it. The rest of their class is sitting somewhere between crap and shit. I had a chance to sit down with Bacon for a one-on-one exclusive just minutes ago to discuss the Tigers’ recruiting class.
RD: “Thoughts on Mizzou’s class?”
Bacon: “D-G-B!!!”
RD: “He’s going to be great, but what about the rest of the class?”
Bacon: “Dude, who cares? We got DGB!!!!!”
RD: “I mean you guys are in the SEC now. You’re going to need some studs all over the field to compete. You see any other guys stepping up from this class?”
Bacon: “D!!! G!!! B!!!”
RD: “Thanks for your time.”
Maybe it was the putrid Missouri rap video that’s been unfortunately tearing through the web, but to say Missouri’s class is top heavy would be quite an understatement. They signed Dorial Green-Beckham, one 4-star and a slew of threes and twos.
Nebraska
Crazy Bo Pelini hasn’t really taken off like Husker fans have expected. The move to the Big 10 was a hurdle he’d have to overcome, not just learning the ins and outs of his new foes, but with new recruiting territories. Their commitment list looks like it’s still stuck in the Big 12 North, not with the big boys of the Big 10.
I’d love to be a fly on the wall when a recruiting target makes the “Thanks, but no thanks” phone call to Crazy Pelini. Although, I bet he just takes his frustration out on a pack of chewing gum.
California
“Honestly R.D., no one gives a shit about that liberal California school.”
I understand, and apparently the recruits stopped caring as well. Cal Berkeley was the talk of the Army All-American game recently when we saw an onslaught of 5-star prospects commit to them on national television. The recruiting high that all 35 of the Cal football fans felt was quickly pissed on when those same recruits de-committed when Cal lost a vital member of their coaching staff.
Competing with USC, Stanford and Oregon isn’t getting any easier for the Bears.
Other losers: Georgia, Arkansas, Oklahoma State, Penn State, Notre Dame
Note: Comments are based on the entirety of each program’s class, not just National Signing Day activity.
This is a typical if not above average class for Mizzou. Pinkel takes all the kids he can out of Texas then the best talent in Missouri and coaches them up to play above what most team’s think is their potential. We also got a 5 star recruit from 2010, Darius White, to transfer to Mizzou from Texas.
13 years ago at 9:59 pmExactly.
13 years ago at 10:01 pmWhite was a 4* and a complete bust.
13 years ago at 10:21 pmYeah, have fun with Darius “D-Money” White.
13 years ago at 11:31 pmRoger Dorn is a fucking moron.
13 years ago at 11:41 pm^butthurt
13 years ago at 11:49 pmice cold frat is a fucking genius.
13 years ago at 11:58 pm
13 years ago at 12:02 amProbably because Darius White was working with two mediocre quarterbacks at the helm. He likely realized the uncertainty of the QB situation wasn’t looking to improve any time soon. In case you missed it, Connor Brewer got his shit tossed in the Under Armor game.
13 years ago at 3:48 am^ Wrong. Darius White never saw the field because he is either too dumb or too lazy to read the playbook. This had nothing to do with the QB situation.
13 years ago at 9:19 amSerious question Roger have you wrote an article where you didn’t suck Bevo’s dick? Well here’s a fun fact for you about Texas vs the “horrible” state of Missouri. In College Football Mizzou went 3-1 vs the Texas teams with the one loss coming from a nail biter in Waco (Robert Griffin was on fire). In College Basketball Mizzou has yet to lose a game against any team from Texas including at Baylor and at Texas. And who could forget the World Series where the inevitable happened and St. Louis beat Texas once again on the field. I will give you props the Cowboys did beat a pretty injured Rams team, but in the long run the scoreboard is Missouri is 9-2 against Texas, so get over your shithole state.
13 years ago at 8:38 pmGeorgia was a loser? Last time i check ESPN ranked their recruiting class 5 best in the nation.(Shit the people there only get paid to analyze sports)
13 years ago at 10:00 pm5th*
13 years ago at 10:01 pm19th per Rivals.com…
13 years ago at 10:20 pmBoth are inaccurate. Just look at top recruits from five years ago and you’ll be like “who the fuck are you?” But I’ve always found RIVALS to be more accurate than ESPN.
13 years ago at 10:23 pmUW coming back to prominence slowly but surely. #20
13 years ago at 10:35 pmrivals also doesn’t consider Harvey-Clemons a commitment….
13 years ago at 10:55 pmSo you go by Rivals, now I understand.
13 years ago at 2:57 pmUGA ended up 11th after the Harvey Clemons shit cleared up. The difference between the two is that Rivals grade’s the class as a whole, regardless of needs. ESPN grades on a team filling their needs. Therefore, according to Rivals, UGA’s class was 11th best, but was rated higher on ESPN because they did a better job filling the positions needed most. Rivals has better coverage, but they are both accurate.
13 years ago at 10:32 pmDGB has obviously never heard of rivals.com
13 years ago at 10:06 pmAs a Nebraskan I would have to agree, not to impressed with our recruits, but with that said I’m still a fan. GBR
13 years ago at 10:17 pmI agree with Dorn about the problems Nebraska is facing; the B1G and BigXII require different types of recruits, and it’s going to take a few years to adapt to that, especially with Dantonio, Bielema, Hoke, and now Meyer going against him.
13 years ago at 10:28 pmGuarantee Tommy Armstrong and Jordan Westerkamp go all Tom Brady and Randy Moss on the Big Ten’s piss poor excuse for defensive backfields in 2ish years. With that said, fuck Carlfense.
13 years ago at 11:13 pmWisconsin and Michigan State had the 4th and 11th best passing defenses in the nation last year (respectively), and the 15th and 6th ranked total team defenses in the nation, again, respectively. (Didn’t help my Spartans a damn bit when they visited Lincoln in the middle of their tough stretch of the schedule, though).
Point being, don’t be too quick to dismiss Big Ten defenses.
13 years ago at 11:33 pmYou should always take these 4 and 5 star ranking with a grain of salt. But the Longhorns recruiting class is pretty fucking impressive with twenty 4 stars.
13 years ago at 10:17 pmOne day UW will return to its rightful spot on top, one day. Come back Dawgs we miss you.
13 years ago at 10:23 pmthe real Dawgs play in the SEC.
13 years ago at 10:44 pmUW is going to be third in the North for a while, Stanford and Oregon will switch off between 1 & 2 for the next decade..
On another note, the biggest winner by far today was Stanford….They locked down three *5 stars and still have a shot of snagging Jameis Winston.
13 years ago at 11:21 pmrespect to UW for pawing its way back to the top 25. go dawgs
13 years ago at 4:00 amUW will be a joke. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if a team like the Utes ran all over he Huskies.
13 years ago at 10:29 amYes, he huskies.
13 years ago at 10:48 am^^ Utah and Colorado are the red-headed step-children of the PAC-12. Nobody expects them to win anything. Washington 31 Utah 14.
13 years ago at 2:10 pmJust wait and see, c.unt. You may not expect anything, but it will come to pass.
13 years ago at 1:02 amFUCK DGB
13 years ago at 11:11 pmMizzou will stil be the third best Tigers in the SEC.
Enjoy the pledgship
still*
13 years ago at 11:13 pmwe’ll be happy to cream pie your overrated faces
13 years ago at 11:41 pmIt’s funny how Mizzou thinks they are “top tier” all of a sudden, just because they moved-up to a much more superior conference.
13 years ago at 12:27 amehh they were still cocky assholes in the Big 12. and as a Kansas fan, sure, I’m biased. but since KU and MU started playing each other in football, MU only has a 1 game lead in the series… and KU’s a football powerhouse, right…?
13 years ago at 8:02 amMizzou is equally as delusional as A&M. They have a combined one conference championship and now they think they can hang in the SEC?
13 years ago at 9:22 amArkansas has ZERO SEC championships and they seem to think pretty highly of themselves, especially for next year. Also with zero SEC championships? South Carolina. I hear a lot of talk from those guys every couple of years as well. Even if Mizzou had a random conference championship, say from like 1997 (just for the sake of making an example) it wouldn’t have any bearing in 2012.
I think most of the excitement comes from a combination of moving to the SEC and realizing that this upcoming team actually does have a quite a bit of potential. Trust me when I say Missouri fans aren’t cocky, they just tend to get overly excited but only when they have a reason to. Most of the time we sit around expecting the worst to happen, and unfortunately it often does.
13 years ago at 9:52 am^
13 years ago at 11:14 am^^ Thank you. Too many years I’ve watched a Mizzou team get their collective asses handed to them by Nebraska, Oklahoma, Texas, etc. Even when Mizzou did manage to beat one of those teams early in the season, they always seemed to get slapped in the face on the road by a team of nonathletic drunkards (Colorado).
13 years ago at 12:24 pmWait there’s a Kansas fan replying? Not only should you be banned from speaking about college football (as you have absolutely no credibility on the subject because you chose to attend the school with a football shit show), you should also have to pay a tax to even enter the fine state of Missouri. Kansans are free-loading bastards who plunder all of the wonderful things on the other side of the state line. State out or we’ll burn Lawrence to the ground. Again.
13 years ago at 5:00 pm^ Aw yes, the great state of Missouri. Where they have 6 million people and 6 last names.
13 years ago at 1:17 pmThe fine state of Missouri…man the meth must be good over there.
13 years ago at 1:19 pmanyone who considers the birthplace of the Westboro Baptist Church is “frat” should be shot in the fucking head
13 years ago at 8:31 pmCompared to kansas, yes, Missouri is a damn fine state. And yes, I’m sure the meth is excellent.
13 years ago at 12:07 pm2nd Recruitment class in the nation and we only get and honorable mention? C’mon RD
13 years ago at 11:17 pmSeriously…. 3 players #1 in their position….fuck Ohio State and USC, Noles won big today, i knew we weren’t gonna pass Alabama coming off a Championship so ill take #2
13 years ago at 11:53 pmi hope this imbecile remembers how much of an incompetent columnist he is when the noles start bringing national championship rings back to Tallahassee.
13 years ago at 11:22 am^
13 years ago at 3:09 pm^
13 years ago at 3:40 pmthe noles went with quality over quantity…..will work in the acc but I think the depth would hurt them if they weren’t in such a shitty conference. Conference champs gave up 70 in their bowl game
13 years ago at 4:00 pmJohnathan Gray, representing my high school.
13 years ago at 11:24 pmgo make a sandwich
13 years ago at 11:52 pmAnd chose the best school in the country…
13 years ago at 12:00 amDGB, Maty Mauk, Evan Boehm. And we get Darius White.
go fuck yourself, Roger.
13 years ago at 11:40 pmthree 4 stars. get your facts straight dorn
13 years ago at 11:52 pmI’m going off Rivals, brochacho.
13 years ago at 11:56 pmStick a vibrator dipped in acid down your throat Roger Dorn, Mizzou’s recruiting class is ranked number 20. Regardless of what your red-neck ass says Gary Pinkel gets players who fits his system, and excuse me what happened last year? Oh yeah Mizzou beat the shit out of A&M and UT and as far as I’m concerned you can’t even talk shit if you go to those schools. while Mack Brown (who deserves all the respect in the world) consistently gets great recruiting classes, his teams have performed poorly since Colt McCoy left, and A&M is a joke of a school. Unless you go to those two schools you’re like a black man trying to vote in post-civil war Mississippi, you have no rights. So go pick me some cotton boy before I send the overseer on your ass.
13 years ago at 1:42 am^ And in one fell swoop, this guy has just given away every last one of his fucks.
13 years ago at 3:34 am^^ Although I really like the message you’re throwing out, you should really tighten those laces and make a thousand laps for the numerous unacceptable grammatical errors.
13 years ago at 4:34 am