Nation’s #2 Football Recruit Shuns Tide for Auburn
12 years ago

It’s been a tough Thursday in the Saban household. As my colleague reported earlier today, Kristen Saban, daughter of Alabama head football coach The Nicktator, will soon face assault charges for going American History X on a sorority sister. Nick Saban’s wound was exposed and gaping with the news of his daughter going nationwide, then Reuben Foster backed up a truckload of salt to dump in it.

Reuben Foster is a 5-star linebacker out Georgia, and he’s ranked as the nation’s #2 overall prospect. He called a press conference for Thursday afternoon to announce his Bama de-commitment and subsequent commitment to a different program. Speculation was building and the new frontrunners were thought to be Auburn and Georgia. He chose Auburn. Nick Saban’s head exploded. And a gasoline-soaked log was thrown onto the blaze of this already bitter rivalry.

“Over the last several weeks, I’ve really put a lot of thought and time into where I want to go to continue my football career,” Foster said. “I am blessed that I have the situation where I have several great opportunities and I appreciate everyone that attended this and who has helped me get to this point.

“I want to make an announcement so I can put this behind me and get to work on what I need to do to prepare for college both academically and athletically.

“I am going to enroll at Auburn University.”

Has Nick Saban’s contract with the devil finally expired? Don’t count on it. This is merely a speed bump for college football’s greatest coach. It does sting, though. This kid is a heat-seeking missile. Check out his highlights here:

And if you see Nick on the streets, just avoid eye contact. You’ll be safe.

  3. Fratting in 1868

    Nick Saban is fucked.
    On a related note…I hope they don’t shit on you, Dorn.

    12 years ago at 4:04 pm
    1. Tallapoosa Snu

      Nick Saban is never fucked. He’s one of the best coaches ever. I wish Richt was more of a freakish football robot with no feelings or emotions. I love him, but he’s the kind of dude that puts a retarded kid in with 4 seconds left in the 4th quarter to jog in a TD. Saban is on the other side of the field saying “rip that fucking kid’s head off, I want a better point differential.”

      12 years ago at 8:28 pm
    3. colonial ft soldier

      He’ll end up switching back. Signing day isn’t until February, and that’s plenty of time for Coach Saban to make Foster see the light.

      12 years ago at 11:24 am
    5. colonial ft soldier

      I didn’t know about the tattoo, but he’s going to Auburn High School. He isn’t enrolled at the University

      12 years ago at 3:00 pm
  4. Bill Fratsky

    His press release was identical to the press release issued by TJ Yeldon when he switched from Auburn to Bama… basically a giant “fuck you” to Bama.

    12 years ago at 4:06 pm
    1. Old_Fashioned

      #22 I bet he also played some RB, and probably destroyed tacklers in hilarious fashion. I’d like to see that reel as well.

      This kid is going to be fucking hated by the Alabama fanbase.

      12 years ago at 8:42 am
    2. Bill Fratsky

      ^ He did, actually, there are highlights on youtube of him dragging people trying to tackle him, it’s great.

      12 years ago at 9:13 am
    3. DamnGladtoMeetYou

      Any Bama fan that welcomes T.J. Yeldon with open arms, but calls out Foster’s “character” for decommitting is a fuck stick.

      12 years ago at 3:51 pm
  7. anon7472974648

    “Has Nick Saban’s contract with the devil finally expired?”

    Nah, Auburn just pays better.

    Just ask Cam’s dad.

    12 years ago at 4:41 pm
    1. thats pledge work

      Auburn plays better? That’s why they have so many championships spread out over such a long time period, right? Oh, wait… sorry I asked. RMFT!

      12 years ago at 9:27 pm
    3. BourbonBred

      ^Ah, the Alabama school system really pays off. Is Reading 101 a junior or senior level class?

      12 years ago at 10:52 pm
    4. Bill Fratsky

      ^ Alabama fans are of questionable intelligence, don’t worry. They can’t seem to grasp that the FBI and NCAA didn’t find anything, either.

      12 years ago at 7:38 am
  8. OldSouthern

    We have plenty of talent here already and coming in. I think we’ll be fine without him. Good player though

    12 years ago at 5:49 pm
  9. the fratness monster

    Which states have the best high school football.
    My list: Texas, Alabama, Florida, Georgia, Oklahoma.
    I don’t know much about Louisiana football, but one of the teams in my state has beaten one of the better teams in Louisiana two years straight, or else I’d put them in the top. I’m going by per capita basis, and that means that shit football overall out of California doesn’t count.

    12 years ago at 6:18 pm
    2. anon7472974648

      btw, how can you say you’re going by per capita basis, then include both Texas and Florida? Silliness.

      12 years ago at 6:23 pm
    3. the fratness monster

      ^ How many great football teams does California have? Maybe 5? They just don’t have great football overall. It’s been awhile but the last time a team from my state played a California team (supposedly the best), it was 52-14. I know Oklahoma is small, but the top 5 teams in Oklahoma could compete in Texas. The top 2 teams in Oklahoma (Jenks and Union, also known as best rivalry currently by ESPN) would consistently make it to the quarterfinals or further in Texas 5A. Per capita Texas and Florida are easily in the top 5. Texas especially has great football. If you’re going to throw a Hoover argument into this I have a sad counter argument.

      12 years ago at 7:56 pm
    4. the fratness monster

      ^^ That article has California simply because there’s a shit ton of people there. More people generally gives you more D1 prospects, not necessarily quality football overall.

      12 years ago at 7:59 pm
    5. To The Hazement

      Reuben is playing his senior season at Auburn High School and they are almost always in contention for the state championship. He should get to play against some of the best teams in Alabama and from surrounding states. This might show how good he truly is.

      12 years ago at 10:20 am
    6. JeopardyPledge

      ^What is, false claim?

      As a graduate of a Birmingham Metro area high school that rhymes with disapprover, I refute the claim that Auburn High School is a major State Championship contender. They have repeatedly underachieved in the playoffs and big regular season games, and have one of the shittiest schedules in the state’s 6A classification next year.

      And the loss of this Foster kid is no doubt a death blow. Alabama’s recruiting class now falls to a paltry #1 in the nation.

      12 years ago at 1:58 pm
    7. To The Hazement

      Okay bud don’t get your panties in a wad I was just going off of how it was when I was in high school when they were almost always in the semi finals or close to it. Anyways, It doesn’t really matter if you think they are state championship material this year because the main point I was trying to make is that he would probably be facing tougher competition playing in Alabama rather than Louisiana.

      12 years ago at 3:38 pm
  10. RAW DOG ASSASSIN

    did he play in an all black league holy shit i think one of the opposing teams had ONE white guy. If you played football in Georgia then you know that all-black or majority black teams usually were atrocious because their coaching and overall work ethic sucked major balls

    12 years ago at 7:37 pm
    1. Tallapoosa Snu

      I second this. Every good player they had was out mid-season at best for grades or banned substances. The few that remained were a couple all-stars surrounded by kids who wanted to wear a jersey to school on fridays. Did our players juice? Yeah. But we were smart enough to actually get away with it.

      12 years ago at 8:15 pm
    3. BoykinSpaniel

      yeah but I mean what successful program doesn’t have a primarily black defense these days but still I wouldn’t call Troup a black program. The majority of the teams in their region come from Columbus which is full of mostly black schools (Jordan, Kendrick, Carver, Shaw)

      12 years ago at 5:04 pm