Nation’s #2 Football Recruit Shuns Tide for Auburn
12 years ago

It’s been a tough Thursday in the Saban household. As my colleague reported earlier today, Kristen Saban, daughter of Alabama head football coach The Nicktator, will soon face assault charges for going American History X on a sorority sister. Nick Saban’s wound was exposed and gaping with the news of his daughter going nationwide, then Reuben Foster backed up a truckload of salt to dump in it.

Reuben Foster is a 5-star linebacker out Georgia, and he’s ranked as the nation’s #2 overall prospect. He called a press conference for Thursday afternoon to announce his Bama de-commitment and subsequent commitment to a different program. Speculation was building and the new frontrunners were thought to be Auburn and Georgia. He chose Auburn. Nick Saban’s head exploded. And a gasoline-soaked log was thrown onto the blaze of this already bitter rivalry.

“Over the last several weeks, I’ve really put a lot of thought and time into where I want to go to continue my football career,” Foster said. “I am blessed that I have the situation where I have several great opportunities and I appreciate everyone that attended this and who has helped me get to this point.

“I want to make an announcement so I can put this behind me and get to work on what I need to do to prepare for college both academically and athletically.

“I am going to enroll at Auburn University.”

Has Nick Saban’s contract with the devil finally expired? Don’t count on it. This is merely a speed bump for college football’s greatest coach. It does sting, though. This kid is a heat-seeking missile. Check out his highlights here:

And if you see Nick on the streets, just avoid eye contact. You’ll be safe.

  2. Tallapoosa Snu

    After watching that video, that kid’s the new ray lewis in the right system… his vision and speed are fucking insane, it looks like he knows the play before the offense does. I don’t know if Auburn’s system is the best for him…. Georgia or Florida (it hurt to type that) would be a much better fit for his size and speed. And Auburn’s DC is gonna make him gain weight, slow him down and make him succeptible to injury. They’re paying at least as much as they did for Cam.

    12 years ago at 8:23 pm
    1. Bill Fratsky

      ^ No, he wants to stay closer to his daughter (sounds a lot like Mark Ingram). And Auburn’s new DC is the shit.

      12 years ago at 9:16 am
    2. To The Hazement

      Well Vangordon did coach at Georgia so im sure there are some similarities between their systems. I think Rueben will be fine at Auburn especially with Dee Liner, Carl Lawson, and possibly Montravious Adams in front of him.

      12 years ago at 10:28 am
  3. PhiKapSkulls11

    Why do they yellow circle him on every play, it is obvious he is making the tackle every time otherwise it wouldn’t be on the video.

    12 years ago at 10:14 pm
  4. AriGold9

    This guy isn’t very big. He better put on some weight if he wants to tackle SEC running backs.

    12 years ago at 12:45 am
  6. JudgeFraterson

    Nice job Reuben! Now you have 4 full years of mediocrity to look forward to… not to mention a head coach with a Flo-Bee haircut with an extreme prejudice for sideburns, “a fully operational Chick-fil-a on campus.” and a brand spanking new llama farm. Awwww, the ol Booger Eaters, God love ’em!

    12 years ago at 7:32 am
    2. JudgeFraterson

      Point for originality. Fresh of the natty championship and well on our way to arguably a 4th recruiting natty championship… I am truly devastated. Speaking of butthurt I would bring the astroglide Nov. 24th to Tuscaloosa for the Iron Bowl. No actually there is not enough lube on earth to relieve that kind of ass raping.

      12 years ago at 1:08 pm
    3. Bill Fratsky

      ^ Since anyone cares about “recruiting national championship.” Yeah we’re real scared, since, you know, we’ve done so bad at Jordan-Hare West stadium the past century… oh, wait a second…

      12 years ago at 3:02 pm
    4. JudgeFraterson

      I’m done here since I just figured out you are the freckled faced nerd I used to beat up and steal lunch money from. Take it back to the AGR house cow humper.

      12 years ago at 4:11 pm
    6. Bill Fratsky

      ^^ Wrong fraternity, try again. While running laps. On razorblades. with bare feet.

      12 years ago at 8:37 am