New Study Finds The Top 10 Heaviest Drinking Cities In America

If you like hipsters, move to Portland. If you like barbecue, move to Kansas City. If you like being a filthy, degenerate alcoholic who’ll drink rubbing alcohol they ran through a Brita filter just to chase away their violent, Michael J. Fox-esque morning shakes, move to Knoxville, Tennessee. Why Knoxville? According to a recent study conducted by Sharecare, it’s the heaviest drinking city in America (first for men, fourth for women).

Knoxville’s title as the heaviest drinking city in America, while random, is certainly not surprising. A college town with little else to do seems like the perfect breeding ground for raging alcoholics. Sure, party cities like New Orleans or Austin are full of drinkers, but never underestimate the overwhelming need to drink to forget how miserable of a place you’re in. It consumes you.

Top 10 Heaviest Drinking Cities For Men

1. Knoxville, TN
2. Louisville, KY
3. Greenville, SC
4. Oklahoma City, OK
5. Portland, OR
6. Greensboro, NC
7. Jacksonville, FL
8. Las Vegas, NV
9. Cincinnati, OH
10. Nashville, TN

Top 10 Heaviest Drinking Cities For Women

1. Memphis, TN
2. Salt Lake City, UT
3. Jacksonville, FL
4. Knoxville, TN
5. Columbus, OH
6. Greenville, SC
7. Louisville, KY
8. Raleigh, NC
9. Cincinnati, OH
10. Oklahoma City, OK

A few thoughts on the list:

– Hipster bros must be crushing microbrews in Portland.

– Most of these cities fall under the “there’s nothing else to do but get blackout” category.

– Despite my affinity for drinking, the fact that Jacksonville makes both lists somehow makes it seem depressing, not fun. It’s the only one I feel that way about. God, that place sounds terrible.

– Salt Lake City coming out of nowhere for the ladies. To be fair, being a woman in Utah sounds awful. I’d drink heavily too. #SisterWifeStruggle

– Memphis is the number one drinking city for women, but makes the least heavy drinking cities for men. Not really sure how that works, but I guess the only non-tourists on Beale Street are the women and the little black kids doing gymnastics.

– The relatively short stretch of I-71 between Louisville and Cincinnati must be littered with empty beer cans and bourbon bottles. That is the most concentrated alcoholic area in America, according to this survey.

[via Yahoo!]

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  1. JohnFratYatesSommers

    I would think that beer/liquor sales per capita would be a far more accurate way to gauge the drinking habits of a town than basing it off the laughably small sample size of 250,000 survey respondents.

    11 years ago at 11:50 am
  2. FratterNation

    Alcohol has been the only way to cope with the Jacksonville Jaguars the last few years.

    11 years ago at 11:52 am
  3. duckdog

    I live in Knoxville. This list does not make sense. Some professor (or group of professors) at UTK drove their students to the Sharecare website to take the RealAge Test for a class experiment and fucked up the data.

    11 years ago at 11:57 am
  4. duckdog

    Knoxville is not that bad a place to live. I’ve lived other places I liked better, but in the past several years Knoxville has definitely “picked up” from where it was 7-8 years ago. The hipster scene is growing, and their are rumblings about Knoxville being the “Next Austin” I swear if I hear one more bearded, skinny jean wearing, malt beverage connoisseur comment on the “hop-iness” of their beer….

    11 years ago at 12:10 pm
    1. Fratmiral Nelson

      Portland is more of a “Blacked Out in my Kilt and rode my Unicycle to the Tattoo Parlor” type of town

      11 years ago at 10:53 pm
    2. CapstoneRager

      ^ This is the most accurate depiction of Portland that I have ever seen. That city is crawling with hippies, geeds, and hipsters.

      11 years ago at 3:13 am
  5. nattapolt

    I don’t agree with this list, but I did take a road trip to Cincy and Louisville in one weekend, and it was a riot.

    11 years ago at 12:35 pm
  6. fuckinggeeds

    Where is any city in WI? That state has been holding the binging record for 15 years straight!

    11 years ago at 1:08 pm
  7. sigpig1904

    God I hated living in Jacksonville. SO glad to get out of that god forsaken state.

    11 years ago at 1:59 pm
  8. sperrys and vests

    All these lists are such bull shit they always forget so many places and schools

    11 years ago at 2:12 pm
    1. eoufratdaddy

      You’re so cool and frat, please tell me more hate on the beer capital of the world.

      11 years ago at 1:35 am