Nike Unveils Team USA World Cup Jerseys And They’re Classic, Badass

Once again, the time is quickly approaching for a marginally larger amount of Americans to give a crap about soccer. With the 2014 World Cup only months away, Nike and Team USA released the first photos of America’s home kit today. The uniforms looks pretty great.

Looking pretty good there, America, though Nike usually knocks their uniform efforts out of the park–save for the occasional neon tragedy of an Oregon jersey. I’m waiting for one where all the duck feathers on the shoulder pads are machetes, because Nike has run out of ways to try and make a duck look intimidating. As for the American home kits, I’m an especially big fan of going back to the collared jerseys. It’s a classic look, and I’m definitely picking one of these up before June, because soccer! America.

Here’s a picture of American forward Jozy Altidore rocking the new jersey.

Hopefully the sharp home kits (and presumably our yet-to-be-revealed sharp road kits) give the Americans a little extra confidence heading into the Cup. The Americans are going to need it, as they drew the deadliest group of World Cup pool play in decades. The Americans will square off against arguably the best team in the world in Germany, and they will also face Portugal, which arguably has the best player in the world, Cristiano Ronaldo. The Americans also drew their main 21st century soccer rival, a team that has given the Yanks all sorts of trouble over the years: England Mexico Ghana. Ghana?! Yeah, Ghana, who the Americans have fallen to in the last two World Cups.

Either way, the new unis look great, so there’s that.

Who am I kidding? Screw the uniforms. Just, for the love of God, don’t lose to fucking Ghana again. Caring about Ghana for two days in the last 12 years is more than any American should ever have to care about Ghana. We open pool play against the country with nearly one quarter the GDP of Kentucky on June 16 at 6 p.m. EST.

[via Twitter]

  1. FuckingLegend

    Here’s to 2014 being the year we kick the world’s ass in soccer, like we do in everything else

    11 years ago at 11:56 am
    1. Ron_Bourbondy

      Here’s to 2014 being the year we don’t give a fuck about soccer, like we do every year.

      11 years ago at 8:19 pm
    2. FuckingLegend

      Lemme guess Ron, you were the one not letting the kids wear their American flag shirts on cinco de mayo too? Show a little love for your country, jackass

      11 years ago at 9:26 pm
    3. SEC Gameday Drunk

      Ha. Haha. Hahahaha as an ODP player, and someone of a soccer fan you’re on drugs if you think America is getting out of their group this year.

      11 years ago at 7:17 pm
  2. ASU_FRAT

    To everyone saying we’re going to lose in the group stage, have some team spirit you jackassses

    11 years ago at 12:00 pm
  3. PledgeMaster12

    Dear God, we can’t lose to Ghana again. The kits are classy. A lot of soccer fans do not like them because they look like a polo…those people are obviously GDIs. But ultimately, their popularity will be determined by the play of the team in the World Cup.

    11 years ago at 12:01 pm
  4. Cockmeatsandwich

    Anything would be better than those stupid where’s waldo uniforms they rocked for a while

    11 years ago at 12:07 pm
  5. Inebriation

    We didn’t actually get the group of death Bacon… its the worst group the US has gotten, but the “deadliest group in decades” belongs to group D, Uruguay, England, Italy and Costa Rica.

    11 years ago at 12:24 pm
    1. PledgeMaster12

      Considering we have only beaten ONE of our opponents in WC play (and it’s Portugal, who has the best player in the world), I’d say it’s the Group of Death for us.

      11 years ago at 12:48 pm
    2. thiswebsitesucks

      you’re an idiot…England has not won anything since before the revolutionary war , who tf is costa rica…uruguay=suarez, and italy is quality. 1 good team and you dub the group “deadliest group in decades”

      11 years ago at 12:48 pm
      1. ZeteNJ

        Actually England won the World Cup in 1966. And you would know this if you knew any Englishmen because they will tell you within 5 minutes of meeting them.

        11 years ago at 7:33 pm
    3. mancandyandy

      England and Italy are old, Uruguay is only good for their attack, and Costa Rica is shitty.. That is not the group of death by any means.

      11 years ago at 12:59 pm
    4. ThisIsWhyWeChop

      It really depends on how you define “Group of Death.” Group D certainly has three very good teams compared to Group G’s two, but our group (Group G) has Germany.

      11 years ago at 1:12 pm
    5. ZeteNJ

      Totally rocking this popped collar with the Sperrys for Ghana and Portugal, but for the Germany match, I’m going with the Back to Back World War Champs tank.

      11 years ago at 5:32 pm
    1. mancandyandy

      Good luck with that. You probably still play against Spain and Germany every single game.

      11 years ago at 12:58 pm
      1. Jerry Seinfrat

        Thanks, I’ll play a club team like barca for all I care. It’s a video game, rushee.

        11 years ago at 1:08 pm
    1. Bud Fratster

      Hard to tell from the picture, but I think that’s Alex Morgan. Surprised nobody has said anything about her yet.

      11 years ago at 1:05 pm