Power Ranking The Letters Of The Greek Alphabet

Jared Borislow10 years ago

For most of us, there are two or three Greek letters that we hold above all others. If we take a step back and look at the Greek alphabet holistically, though, where do they all match up to each other? Let’s find out.

1. Beta (B) – It’s in the name.
2. Delta (Δ) – Used as the symbol for “change.” Probably voted for Obama. Liberal trash.
3. Eta (H) – Arguably the most useless letter in the Greek alphabet. When have you ever used eta? Most people just think it’s the English letter “h.” I pity everyone unfortunate enough to be a member of their fraternity’s eta pledge class.
4. Xi (Ξ) – “Zee? Zi?” If 95% of people don’t know what to call you, you’re gonna rank pretty low on this list.
5. Omega (Ω) – Omega is this low solely because of those unbearable Rory McIlroy Omega watch commercials that played every 30 seconds this PGA Tour season.
6. Upsilon (Υ) – “Wait… did you say epsilon?”
7. Rho (P) – Rho? Yeah… You’re just just a “p,” my dude.
8. Omicron (O) – Omicron just feels lazy to me.
9. Nu (N) – Nu should probably find a “nu” letter to represent itself. BOOORINGGGG.
10. Mu (M) – As boring as Nu, but not as easy to make an insulting pun with.
11. Zeta (Z) – Thanks to the sorority, instantly brings to mind hot girls.
12. Kappa (K) – Same as Zeta.
13. Pi (Π) – An otherwise top-tier letter that suffers from having the same name as a baked good.
14. Iota (I) – Can be represented with a middle finger. Frat.
15. Chi (X) – Put three Chis together and you’ve got yourself a nice little Friday night alone planned.
16. Tau (T) – A letter that’ll get the chicks to whip out their tau taus.
17. Phi (Φ) – An important letter to the fraternity system that also happens to kinda look like you’re hitting a chick from behind.
18. Lambda (Λ) – Lambda’s tent is permanently pitched, that sailor.
19. Sigma (Σ) – The letter that comes to mind when you think “Greek letter.”
20. Theta (Θ) – Kinda looks like a butthole?
21. Gamma (Γ) – Gamma goes dick out for the chicks 24/7 and doesn’t give a fuck.
22. Epsilon (E) – Upsilon’s cool older brother. Probably the coolest-sounding Greek letter.
23. Psi (Ψ) – It’s an iota that’s flexing its biceps. Power move.
24. Alpha (A) – Like I said: it’s in the name..

If you really love the Greek alphabet, you’ll conquer Greek God, our version of the 2048 puzzle challenge.