Ridiculous Tinder Pickup Lines

Ridiculous Tinder Pickup Lines, Part 112
8 years ago

Crazy things can happen when you swipe right.

shelby
“Shelby sitting on my face when she cums,” your new favorite folk song lyric.
olive
This question was asked of me during my TFM job interview.
paris
Shouldn’t have said that it was a lie, dude. I think you had her going there.
dee
L, is for the way you look at me…
apoorva
The classic “absence of a no is a yes” assumption. That never got ANYBODY in trouble!

If you’ve had a hilarious Tinder interaction or have come across an absurd Tinder profile, send it to Jared@totalfratmove.com

brennan
Step Brothers quotes, the pinnacle of millennial comedy.
estee
A rare case where the double entendre makes the line less likely to work.
bailey
Should’ve been playing Fratty Bird, fam.
helen
That the best you got? Lame.
mallory
This is the #1 best thing that can possibly happen when you go on Tinder
Pages: 1 2
  3. MuffMcFluff

    They couldn’t decide if Jared was more boring or more slow (mentally) so they just named him “Borislow.”

    8 years ago at 12:41 pm
    1. Jared Borislow

      Just so everyone’s clear, he didn’t come up with this. Thanks for listening to the podcast though, Muff!

      8 years ago at 3:33 pm
      1. MuffMcFluff

        I’ve actually never listened to your podcast and did come up with it on my own, but I’m glad someone on there has a great sense of humor as well.

        8 years ago at 6:58 pm
    1. smithpm

      Or you just come over in clean clothes and when she asks about dirty laundry, just say they will be in a few minutes and lead her to the bedroom.

      8 years ago at 1:12 pm
  6. JohnnieWalker_Blue

    I think if you substitute “Quill” for “Scroll” youd get a more accurate euphemism. Good shit though, Gerald.

    8 years ago at 1:15 pm
  10. rryavec

    The guys who said the bird is cool has watched Anthony Jeselnik’s, “Caligula” way too many times.

    8 years ago at 8:17 pm