Robert E. Lee Elementary School Turns To Internet To Help Rename School, The Internet Does What The Internet Does

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The fact that Robert E. Lee Elementary School, located in Austin, Texas, will be undergoing a name change should not be all that surprising considering the fact that we live in a day and age where people feel marginalized by pretty much anything.

To help with the name change, the school board decided that it would be a great idea to turn to the ever so reliable general public to help generate some ideas. As predicted, the results were less than stellar.

Some notable nominations include:

Donald J. Trump Elementary – Despite losing the Texas primary, Donald is currently the leading candidate in terms of total nominations to get his named slapped up there on that elementary school. I guess we still haven’t learned that educational institutions and the Trump name just aren’t a good mix.

The Elementary School Formerly Known as Robert E. Lee – Nice little Prince tribute here.

John Cena Elementary School – The Pledge of Allegiance every morning would also be replaced with his entrance music, “My Time is Now.”

“Idiocaracy” Elementary – Nothing promotes academic excellence like naming your school after a misspelled word.

Jefferson Davis Elementary – Doubling down on Confederacy names is a bold strategy.

Orenthal James Simpson Elementary School – I mean the man did win a Heisman.

Politically Correct Elementary School #1 – Straightforward and to the point.

Michelle Obama Academy – School lunches would be a nightmare.

Kim Il-Sung High School – All North Korea references aside, it’s an elementary school you morons.

Kanye West Elementary – For someone who publicly claimed that “George Bush doesn’t like black people,” he appears to be somewhat well received in the Lone Star state.

Bleeding Heart Liberal Elementary – “A place for safe spaces, comfortable thoughts, selective history lessons, and meaningless social change.”

Spike Lee Elementary – Spike Lee is about as far from a Texan as Kim Il-Sung is for that matter.

And lastly, with 8 nominations (Ronald Regan Elementary only had 3 to put that in context):

Adolf Hitler School for Friendship and Tolerance – If you want your child to be an “art kid.”

Nicely done Austin, you’ve really outdone yourselves with this one. Based on your primary, you’re not comfortable with The Donald being in the White House, but hey, throw that name up on a children’s school and it’s full steam ahead.

[via Fox 7 Austin]

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      1. SteveHoltOnDrugs

        I can’t wait for your dad’s autobiography! It probably be made into a major motion picture starring George Clooney as Your Dad and Leonardo diCaprio as you! Be sure to take your points from the gross, not the net. The net is for suckers.

        9 years ago at 10:04 am
  1. SK0194

    Rename it Coach Gary Gaines Elementary School. Because Friday Night Lights is just as important to Texas history as the Alamo.

    9 years ago at 2:39 pm