Sorority’s Philanthropy Event Postponed Because Someone Was Offended By Fucking Maracas
11 years ago

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Sad members of our soft American culture are officially running out of things by which to be offended. The latest straw-grasping attempt to express misplaced disdain for something completely harmless comes to us from Quinnipiac University.

A student “activist” single-handedly caused the postponement of a Kappa Alpha Theta philanthropy event because she deemed the display of maracas on a poster for a Latin-themed event to be culturally insensitive and “shameful.” Maracas. Fucking maracas.

The event aimed to raise money for children in foster care, according to a tipster who reached out to me with an explanation.

Dorno,

Didn’t know how else to get this to you, but this morning Quinnipiac’s Kappa Alpha Theta chapter had to postpone their philanthropy event, Queso for CASA which raised money to support kids in foster care. This postponing of events comes in the wake of a self-proclaimed student activist who believe that the event poster was offense because it contained images of maracas. The girl ran to Student Affairs and demanded action be taken. Theta is obviously pretty upset and the rest of the Greek community has been tweeting and sharing videos about what CASA is in hopes to inform everyone.

Below is her tweet getting all bent out of shape over it.

Well done, Gruber (no idea how to add those weird accent marks). Those greedy kids in foster care are too coddled anyway. They don’t need any more handouts. About time someone stepped out of the shadows to toughen these parent-less children up.

___

UPDATE: Apparently, this story is absolutely exploding on the Wigo app.

A Wigo representative I spoke to said this has been their most viral event ever, in the form of an outpouring of support for Kappa Alpha Theta, who intended to offend no one, but only wanted to raise money for children in need.

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Users anywhere are currently able to “peek” inside Quinnipiac University Wigo to get a live feed of it blowing up. If you’d like to express your feelings about the cancelation of the event, go there now and do so.

  3. Swagiculturist

    Stephen Fry summed it up perfectly: “It’s now very common to hear people say, ‘I’m rather offended by that.’ As if that gives them certain rights. It’s actually nothing more… than a whine. ‘I find that offensive.’ It has no meaning; it has no purpose; it has no reason to be respected as a phrase. ‘I am offended by that.’ Well, so fucking what.”

    11 years ago at 6:53 pm
  4. 3GenLegacy13

    The only thing to say is what in the fuck is wrong with people that they are offended by goddamn maracas.

    11 years ago at 8:52 pm
  5. Bush Light

    This shit is hardly funny anymore. Our country is in a very sad state of affairs and it doesn’t look like it’s going to get much better.

    11 years ago at 9:23 pm
  6. DudeBroGuy

    Could end up being wonderful for their philanthropy. All the attention will definitely bring in a ton of money for these kids which can be a bright side to the cunt being such a cunt

    11 years ago at 11:09 pm
  7. FrattyTrappings

    Can we all just send this cunt a “#ChugBleach” on Twitter? If enough people tell you to, you become more likely to do it, and I for one would not mind that obituary showing up.

    11 years ago at 12:10 am
  8. hutchskolf13

    Look out Mexican restaurants, queso, in the American sense, isn’t a staple of Mexican food so Gruber will be after you next.

    11 years ago at 1:35 am
  9. TheFratTwin

    I thought this article had to do with a poster that showed a pair of maracas actually having sex.

    11 years ago at 8:26 am