Stoners Keep Ending Up In The Hospital With A Strange Illness

Doctor Franzia9 years ago

In this enlightened era of legalizing various things our grandparents thought would turn us into Commie zombie monsters (weed, porn, skirts that end above the knees), we have basked in many new indulgences. One of these indulgences is the consumption of recreational marijuana in several of the more progressive states. This has to led to a culture of abundance, where you can get weed almost as easily as liquor.

Coincidentally, also in these states, a lot of people have been showing up in emergency rooms vomiting uncontrollably.

From The Huffington Post:

The symptoms are severe abdominal pain and violent vomiting — and most doctors are initially stumped when they encounter patients with the problem.

The illness is cannabinoid hyperemesis syndrome, which is linked to heavy, long-term use of marijuana, according to experts.

You know what this sounds like to me? Imagine a world where you couldn’t get liquor from the store. You had to buy it from your weird cousin, or that sketch dude you used to kind of know in high school. The liquor wasn’t consistent, either; sometimes it was really top shelf stuff, other times it was warm Modelo. Even so, you had to treat it like good whisky and use sparingly, because you still didn’t have an unlimited supply, even if you did find a steady source of it.

Now that limitation is removed and you can legally purchase like four or five bottles a day. More than you could ever drink on your own. You don’t have any reason not to overindulge anymore, so you drink a ton and then vomit everywhere. The only difference here is that apparently a warm shower will totally alleviate the nausea and vomiting in marijuana’s case. If I could eliminate my hangovers with a warm shower, I would be un-freaking-stoppable.

To all you recently liberated stoners: don’t smoke so much weed you puke uncontrollably and end up in the ER.

Or, you know, whatever man. You do you..

[via The Huffington Post]

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