Teenager Built His Very Own Shaggin’ Wagon, Will Bring it to College and Clean Up

Young Austin Davis is set to choose his college destination soon as tens of thousands of quivering coeds wait with unrelenting anticipation. These girls wait patiently with the Austin Davis lottery ticket in-hand, hoping they hit the jackpot and Davis rolls up to their college town with his shaggin’ wagon in tow, ready to open for business.

Over the last couple years, Davis has been constructing his own trailered dorm room, complete with loft bed, kitchen, shower, desk and pull-out couch. This man cave/bachelor pad on wheels is finally complete.

He’s a senior in high school and has finally finished what will be his dorm room on wheels when he starts college next year. Total cost was $12,000, but it’s debt-free and it’s much more than your typical college digs. It has a full kitchen (including a fridge/freezer, sink and camping oven), a sofa-bed he built himself, a nearly full-sized shower (he chopped the top off) and a composting toilet.

When the media gets up in his business about this rolling love shack, his cover-up is the “mortgage crisis, the environmental impact of large homes and the Small House Movement.” Sharp kid. You’re not foolin’ everybody though, Austin. He’ll have to ditch those flat bills and the fedora, but he’s going to absolutely clean up.

I’m just thankful I don’t have a daughter within towing distance of this ass-slaying savant.

[Source]

***


  1. The Baron

    That bed needs to be at least three times that size for drunken sexcapades. And a roof hatch so broads can remove themselves with ease come morning time is a must.

    12 years ago at 2:12 pm
  2. Terri_Schiavo_Drunk

    Nothing impresses girls like your high school wrestling medals. Frat on.

    12 years ago at 2:14 pm
  3. Too Frat To Fail

    Not going to be doing anything but sleeping in the bed? Yeah we’ll see.

    12 years ago at 2:22 pm
  4. brogadishusratmalia

    I’m surprised this article survived even a single comment. This is just plain stupid and a waste of his valuable high school time where he could have been pregaming for college. Also, actives would destroy that thing in an instant. Hurricane proof? Cool bro, what about 5th year that just drank a handle of bourbon proof? Police can’t even stop those kinds of natural elements when combined properly I don’t think your balsa wood shack has much of a chance. And finally, if he does pledge a house, he won’t be living in that piece of shit anymore anyway, so now he either sells it or let’s it go into disrepair so he can move back into a trailer when/if he graduates college. Stupid, I would never let my future offspring engage in this behavior. Go do some drugs off your girlfriends ass and stop being a weird little bob the builder.

    12 years ago at 2:31 pm
    1. brogadishusratmalia

      No dude, you can’t let articles like this slide or they will reproduce. Had to drop the hammer.

      12 years ago at 2:50 pm
  5. Benjamin Martin

    Should this kid get a bid somewhere, hazing better entail driving off with his trailer while he’s in there, mid slam sesh or not.

    12 years ago at 2:33 pm
    1. Bush Light

      ^ Thank you for the awesome visual I just had. “What the fuck Austin!? You said you put the brakes on!”

      12 years ago at 4:53 pm
  6. RichLaxBro17

    His bed will only let fit/slender women in with him. Also, this mobile house would pull mad ass at tailgates.

    12 years ago at 2:42 pm