First off, there are conservative Jews. Second, Abraham was the first Jew. Jacob was his son, making him the second Jew. Third, anyone who’s ever set foot in any religious institution knows Jesus was a Jew and later began the religion of Christianity. And finally, Judaism is not a race. You can’t convert to a race. And you can’t be half-Jewish anymore you can be half-Christian.
Did you just say a Jewish guy lacked necessary financial skills? Does the planet you’re from not have stereotypes? Actually, I take that back. To quote Daniel Tosh, “It’s not a stereotype if it’s ALWAYS TRUE.” Nearly any Jewish person you can find is fucking loaded. (No jokes about not being able to find Anne Frank, please.)
leave it to the pike to know about being jewish…did the most diverse fraternity in the world recently start accepting kikes…maybe you guys can have a gaza strip party now seeing you have all those dune doons as well.
Try a little harder buddy. I don’t think you got the point across that you’re a bigoted, anti-Semitic high schooler that likes to brag about how sloppy he gets after half a wine cooler. Grow the fuck up.
Ya. Not Jewish. His sons, Shem, Ham, and Japeth, went on to create the races of man. Ham—Africans, Shem—Jews, Japeth—Europeans/Asians.
Besides, if you lived before Jesus, isn’t being a Jew FaF? They’re God’s chosen people, the few he gave bid cards to. They had a 40 year pledge with their pledge trainer Moses in the desert. Stretching it too much…?
Beyond the fact that nearly all of the first half of the Bible is a direct rip-off of every other religion and mythological tale from the periods preceding the “events.” Ever hear of Gilgamesh?
@The Piker – In “The Epic of Gilgamesh”, and in other creation stories, a huge flood is mentioned; all of which lend more credibility to Noah’s flood in the Bible
The Bible is not a, “direct rip-off of every other religion”. It is believed that Abram was selected by God to lead God’s people until God sent his messiah. After Abram was selected by God, God changed Abram’s name to Abraham. Abraham means, father of many nations. Judaism, Christianity, and Islam all branch from Abraham’s original teachings, which is why there are similarities between the Bible, Torah, & Koran.
Abraham’s teaching divided into two religions right away; his son’s had differing interpretations of their father’s teachings. The sons that most of the world remembers are Isaac and Ishmael. Isaac lead Judaism and Ishmael led the Islamic faith. Abraham’s teachings later dived into a third religion when enough Judaism followers believed that God had indeed sent his messiah, Jesus Christ. Those believers later became Christians.
In Christianity we call the first book, “Genesis” and the Second Book, “The New Testament”. “The New Testament” is based on the teaching of Jesus Christ. Muslims and Jews do don’t follow the Bible’s New Testament because they do not believe Christ to be God’s messiah. That is why the second half of the Bible is differs from the Torah, & Koran.
This means that “the first half of the Bible” IS NOT “a direct rip-off of every other religion”, as you are suggesting. The first half of the Bible is comprised of the SAME teachings that are taught among the all three of religions. In other words, “Read a fucking book for once”.
Getting an 1120 two part SAT in the 7th grade taking it through Johns Hopkins. Yeah, I have been reading at a high school graduate level since 3rd grade, sorry to bust a nut on your comment. I can post the score on here. My mom was so proud, she saved it.
Piker you are so stupid. If the flood didnt happen how come we are all related to Noah. you obviously don’t know anything about the bible. where does it say anything about the pyramids or gilgamesh. you probably just made that up so that people would believe you. get out of here stupid athiest!
you have figured me out, sweetie. you are right. i made that stuff about gilgamesh up…he wasn’t actually a biblical figure. I don’t suppose you know who St. Peter is? Or how he died? let me know that, and I will admit to making up all the rest of that stuff.
Whatever it doesnt even matter. BTW an 1120 is not good! I got a 1650. You must not be very smart at all if you got less than 400 points in each section. lol you are like retarded.
wait wait wait… did you just say that because there are many copy cat stories out there written way before the Old Testament that, it gives MORE credit to the Bible. You’re fucking retarded. Does the fact that there were about 10 “virgin birth messiah execution resurrection” stories waaay before the Gospel’s give the New Testament more credibility?
Those stories don’t say anything about gilgamesh or the pyramids because they were all written, revised, and retold by people who probably never knew the pyramids existed. I bet if they realized we would be able to prove two very important stories in the Bible(the Exodus and the flood)to be false they would have changed their stories a bit.
What I wrote was that since there are many stories about such a flood from different cultures and geographical regions, there must have been a flood at some time…
wait so this would include all of you guys because the people who were killed by the flood were fornicators, drunks, greed,sons of neflim, and etc and etc? huh kind of funny.
This is a stretch
14 years ago at 4:04 pmmega yacht
14 years ago at 6:10 pmreally?
14 years ago at 4:08 pmNoah would have been liberal. He was jewish, saved the animals, and lacked the necessary greed to be financially successful.
14 years ago at 4:08 pm^This was just stupid.
14 years ago at 4:13 pmtechnically he was not jewish since judaism began with Jacob… fun fact
14 years ago at 4:36 pmfair point. however, being the patriarch of judaism, i would still call him a jew, as jews descended from his lineage.
14 years ago at 4:47 pmBut by that logic, Jesus would be a Christian.
Welcome to Theology Talk on TFM.
14 years ago at 5:10 pmNo, because Jesus was a follower of Judaism who diverged. Noah was a jew by race, even if not religion.
14 years ago at 5:22 pmFirst off, there are conservative Jews. Second, Abraham was the first Jew. Jacob was his son, making him the second Jew. Third, anyone who’s ever set foot in any religious institution knows Jesus was a Jew and later began the religion of Christianity. And finally, Judaism is not a race. You can’t convert to a race. And you can’t be half-Jewish anymore you can be half-Christian.
14 years ago at 5:31 pmhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jews
14 years ago at 5:40 pmDid you just say a Jewish guy lacked necessary financial skills? Does the planet you’re from not have stereotypes? Actually, I take that back. To quote Daniel Tosh, “It’s not a stereotype if it’s ALWAYS TRUE.” Nearly any Jewish person you can find is fucking loaded. (No jokes about not being able to find Anne Frank, please.)
14 years ago at 5:41 pmI said Noah, not all jews. Second of all, the frattiest Jew of all time is a democrat. Mr. Lauren himself.
14 years ago at 5:43 pmJews aren’t a race dipshit
14 years ago at 6:12 pmAfter he left the ark he planted his own vineyard and got drunk to the point where he passed out naked, so I would say the guy knew how to live life
14 years ago at 6:43 pmleave it to the pike to know about being jewish…did the most diverse fraternity in the world recently start accepting kikes…maybe you guys can have a gaza strip party now seeing you have all those dune doons as well.
14 years ago at 7:12 pmdune coons keyboard is fucked up because of spilling bourbon on it…cheap bourbon too because makers mark is good but overpriced.
14 years ago at 7:13 pmTry a little harder buddy. I don’t think you got the point across that you’re a bigoted, anti-Semitic high schooler that likes to brag about how sloppy he gets after half a wine cooler. Grow the fuck up.
14 years ago at 8:08 pm^Trying too hard. Also, Maker’s Mark is cheap, relatively.
14 years ago at 8:11 pm^^^Being an ignorant, prejudiced dipshit. NF.
14 years ago at 8:28 pmanyone that has ever sat foot in a religious institution should also know that Jacob is Abraham’s grandson, not his son frat in the hat.
14 years ago at 8:40 pmYes they are, McFratman. They are a nation at least. You can be a Christian Jew.
14 years ago at 8:59 pmJudaism is an ethnoreligious group, so being jewish is both a racial or ethnic distinction and a religious one.
14 years ago at 9:21 pmStupidity. NF
Holy shit some of you are stupid. Lucas is right in regards to the Jews being a race thing. You definitely can be half Jewish.
14 years ago at 10:11 pmEvery one of you are missing the god damn point. God hazed the geeds. The End.
14 years ago at 12:33 amYa. Not Jewish. His sons, Shem, Ham, and Japeth, went on to create the races of man. Ham—Africans, Shem—Jews, Japeth—Europeans/Asians.
14 years ago at 8:51 amBesides, if you lived before Jesus, isn’t being a Jew FaF? They’re God’s chosen people, the few he gave bid cards to. They had a 40 year pledge with their pledge trainer Moses in the desert. Stretching it too much…?
yes
14 years ago at 4:23 pmhow’s it feel to be a sigep
14 years ago at 4:28 pmSucks to suck.
14 years ago at 5:33 pmShouldn’t this have come out on Friday?
14 years ago at 5:36 pmShould have been posted on MyLifeIsBro.com
14 years ago at 9:36 pmWasn’t the flood because man was overtaken by carnal pleasures? Sure sounds like a frat house to me.
14 years ago at 5:56 pmHaven’t we all proved this didn’t happen?
14 years ago at 6:12 pmno, no we didn’t
14 years ago at 8:49 pmOh yes, I forgot the Egyptian Pyramids were all underwater at one point.
Do you also believe the Earth is 6,000 years old and that man walked with Dinosaurs?
People why deny scientific fact, TR(retarded)TC
14 years ago at 6:36 amBeyond the fact that nearly all of the first half of the Bible is a direct rip-off of every other religion and mythological tale from the periods preceding the “events.” Ever hear of Gilgamesh?
14 years ago at 6:52 am@The Piker – In “The Epic of Gilgamesh”, and in other creation stories, a huge flood is mentioned; all of which lend more credibility to Noah’s flood in the Bible
14 years ago at 8:24 amExactly…It is almost a direct rip off of past flood stories, that happened well before 500 BC…dumbass.
14 years ago at 8:28 amAtheist arguments, NF. Not giving a shit about “scientific fact” and believing the bible, TFTC
14 years ago at 8:54 am^
14 years ago at 9:01 am@ Piker
The Bible is not a, “direct rip-off of every other religion”. It is believed that Abram was selected by God to lead God’s people until God sent his messiah. After Abram was selected by God, God changed Abram’s name to Abraham. Abraham means, father of many nations. Judaism, Christianity, and Islam all branch from Abraham’s original teachings, which is why there are similarities between the Bible, Torah, & Koran.
Abraham’s teaching divided into two religions right away; his son’s had differing interpretations of their father’s teachings. The sons that most of the world remembers are Isaac and Ishmael. Isaac lead Judaism and Ishmael led the Islamic faith. Abraham’s teachings later dived into a third religion when enough Judaism followers believed that God had indeed sent his messiah, Jesus Christ. Those believers later became Christians.
In Christianity we call the first book, “Genesis” and the Second Book, “The New Testament”. “The New Testament” is based on the teaching of Jesus Christ. Muslims and Jews do don’t follow the Bible’s New Testament because they do not believe Christ to be God’s messiah. That is why the second half of the Bible is differs from the Torah, & Koran.
This means that “the first half of the Bible” IS NOT “a direct rip-off of every other religion”, as you are suggesting. The first half of the Bible is comprised of the SAME teachings that are taught among the all three of religions. In other words, “Read a fucking book for once”.
14 years ago at 9:09 amThats too long to all read. I am just going to assume that you said Tucker Max is Jesus and also the author of the Bible. You are a tool.
14 years ago at 9:13 amHaving 3rd grade reading capabilities and not being able to read more than two sentences. NF
14 years ago at 9:31 amGetting an 1120 two part SAT in the 7th grade taking it through Johns Hopkins. Yeah, I have been reading at a high school graduate level since 3rd grade, sorry to bust a nut on your comment. I can post the score on here. My mom was so proud, she saved it.
14 years ago at 9:34 amOh my God! That’s the coolest fucking story I’ve ever heard in my life! Can you tell it again, do you have time? Piker, I’m jealous of your SAT score
14 years ago at 9:40 amI’m sorry you only scored a 1200 during high school:( but hey, that 1700 3-part is pretty good for you, right:)
14 years ago at 9:47 amNice smileys.
14 years ago at 10:03 amI figured it would make it look more like the picture book you just learned to read
14 years ago at 11:44 amPiker,
I smoked pot with Johnny Hopkins and Sloan Kettering, and they were blazin that shit up everyday.
14 years ago at 11:49 amPiker you are so stupid. If the flood didnt happen how come we are all related to Noah. you obviously don’t know anything about the bible. where does it say anything about the pyramids or gilgamesh. you probably just made that up so that people would believe you. get out of here stupid athiest!
14 years ago at 3:15 pmyou have figured me out, sweetie. you are right. i made that stuff about gilgamesh up…he wasn’t actually a biblical figure. I don’t suppose you know who St. Peter is? Or how he died? let me know that, and I will admit to making up all the rest of that stuff.
14 years ago at 3:18 pmWhatever it doesnt even matter. BTW an 1120 is not good! I got a 1650. You must not be very smart at all if you got less than 400 points in each section. lol you are like retarded.
14 years ago at 3:32 pm@JJD
wait wait wait… did you just say that because there are many copy cat stories out there written way before the Old Testament that, it gives MORE credit to the Bible. You’re fucking retarded. Does the fact that there were about 10 “virgin birth messiah execution resurrection” stories waaay before the Gospel’s give the New Testament more credibility?
14 years ago at 6:55 pmPhinestMu,
Those stories don’t say anything about gilgamesh or the pyramids because they were all written, revised, and retold by people who probably never knew the pyramids existed. I bet if they realized we would be able to prove two very important stories in the Bible(the Exodus and the flood)to be false they would have changed their stories a bit.
14 years ago at 7:01 pm@frat blunts
What I wrote was that since there are many stories about such a flood from different cultures and geographical regions, there must have been a flood at some time…
14 years ago at 8:40 amPiker, frat blunts, and egotistical WASP all need to be balled from this site. That’s all.
14 years ago at 10:49 amBeing in the majority of people who got drowned out for being a sinful fuck. TFM.
14 years ago at 7:25 pm^geed
14 years ago at 7:34 pmNothing frat about hell
14 years ago at 10:40 amThe devil throws the fattest ragers around
14 years ago at 11:31 amwait so this would include all of you guys because the people who were killed by the flood were fornicators, drunks, greed,sons of neflim, and etc and etc? huh kind of funny.
14 years ago at 7:44 pmget off this site
14 years ago at 11:40 pmI have no problem admitting that I do most of the things Outdoorsman posted.
14 years ago at 11:42 pm^ raging of course is FaF and they were doing that, but part of the point is that they were a dirt mixed race of people worshipping other gods = GDI.
14 years ago at 9:59 am