The 10 Frattest College Football Coaches
Mack Brown
What’s going on, subordinates? Call me Mack. I’m a good coach. Not great, but I’m damn good. I won a natty. Why does that matter? It fucking matters because I leveraged my natty and a slew of 10 win seasons into a CEO role of a money-printing corporation known as the University of Texas football program. We’re rich. Really rich. I got paid $1 million per win last year. How many coaches can say that?
I refuse to acknowledge Mark Richt as frattier than Paul Johnson. The man was a KA, could not possibly give fewer fucks about what anyone says about him, beats other coaches in golf, loves hazing his team, and generally rages like a motherfucker.
http://pic80.picturetrail.com/VOL1917/12705778/22601600/375709669.jpg
13 years ago at 9:09 amI agree with everything said. Mark Richt is a tool and CPJ belongs at the top of this list.
13 years ago at 9:56 amGeorgia Southern HC and coached under Erk. That’s enough for me.
13 years ago at 10:13 amAlso Paul Johnson coaches under the legacy of two other great fratstars, John Heisman and Bobby Dodd. Legacies, always FAF.
13 years ago at 10:41 amAnd Paul Johnson doesn’t care that his all time record will never be as good as Mark Richt’s, nor will he ever have a winning record against UGA. Fuck Tech.
13 years ago at 11:27 am^^ Cool story bro. Must be fun having top-ranked recruiting classes and 6-7 seasons. What’s more satisfying is having classes ranked in the 40s and 50s and making BCS games, because you have a coach who’s worth a damn.
13 years ago at 1:09 pmBack to back national championships are pretty cool too.
13 years ago at 1:38 pmAgreed. Paul Johnson needs to be on this list. Mark Richt wearing dog tags is a gay reason.
13 years ago at 2:29 pm^^Cool story, bro. What’s Tech’s all time record against UGA again? 39 wins, 60 losses? As far as Richt goes, his overall record is 96-34 in the strongest conference in college football, including two SEC championships and being 7-3 in bowl games. What is Paul Johnson’s? 133-52, 2-5 in bowl games. And he hasn’t even coached in a strong conference. Know your fucking football, Techie.
13 years ago at 2:33 pm^actually make Tech’s record 61 losses against UGA.
13 years ago at 2:35 pmScientifically proven fact: Mark Richt is a pussy bitch.
I don’t normally talk shit on the internet, but when I do, its about the Georgia bulldogs.
13 years ago at 2:43 pmSecond everything said here. Mark Richt is a GDI spray tanned bitch, CPJ is a legitimate fraternity man.
13 years ago at 7:28 pmMike Leach = the ultimate hazer
13 years ago at 6:23 amPaul Johnson FaF, the man drinks moonshine
13 years ago at 8:26 amHell they use to make moonshine at the old KA house at WCU.
13 years ago at 10:54 amWhile UGA is much frattier than GT Paul Johnson is much frattier than Mark Richt. This article is about the coaches themselves, not the schools.
13 years ago at 2:20 pmHow the fuck is Bobby Bowden not on this list?
13 years ago at 9:10 amHe’s retired you fucking retard. That’s how the fuck.
13 years ago at 9:12 amDidn’t notice it was only active coaches. Simmer down, sport.
13 years ago at 10:38 amUnacceptable. Take a lap, sport.
13 years ago at 1:04 pmand bowden was a pike so that automatically rules him out
13 years ago at 5:20 pmSchnellenberger was a pike and he’s FAF. Take a lap, Constantine.
13 years ago at 12:58 pmReally missed on Bob Stoops. The guy has been wearing his white OU frat visor for more than a decade now.
13 years ago at 4:33 pmThank god there’s no SEC bias going on here….
Agreed with most. Kiffin is a complete douche who got hazed by Urban Meyer for speaking out while still pledging the SEC…. but continuing to get hired to better jobs without accomplishing anything is pretty frat.
13 years ago at 9:11 amFUCK Lane Kiffin that man will burn for treason
13 years ago at 9:38 amIt sure ain’t “fratter than fuck” to get all butt hurt just because a coach wanted his dream job rather than be stuck in Knoxville. You kids are a bunch of crying little pussies. Not to mention, you called for the head of, and fired Phil Fulmer, who spent 20+ years at your school. Then you have the nerve to call Lane Kiffin (who I give zero fucks about) a traitor after he’s there for a year. No wonder Knoxville’s a shit hole.
13 years ago at 10:05 amLane Kiffin is literally the biggest GDI in college football. He doesn’t care about tradition, has no loyalty to his brothers, and isnt successful (2-15 with raiders) (7-4 with UT [a traditional powerhouse]) and (around .500 with USC [another traditional powerhouse). How can you coach 2 very historically great schools and have near losing records at both? As said before LK will burn in hell for his treason.
13 years ago at 11:34 amI enjoyed this.
13 years ago at 9:15 amWell that makes one of us.
13 years ago at 10:19 amHoward Schnellenberger…..probably raged harder than anyone in the 80’s in Miami. Booze, blow, and mustache rides.
13 years ago at 9:26 amMustache rides, FAF
13 years ago at 10:37 amTobacco Pipe. TFTC
13 years ago at 10:48 amI doubt Mark Richt is actually “yielding” that M-16, possibly wielding though. I would knock Richt down and toss Schnellenberger up top. Just my two cents though.
13 years ago at 9:40 amLane Kiffin?
Go fuck yourself.
Schnellenberger is FaF
13 years ago at 9:51 amHaving a worldview similar to Lane Kiffin. TotalRatMove
12 years ago at 6:07 pmDooley should have to actually win to be part of this list. Losing= NF
13 years ago at 10:06 amyou’ve lost your permission to speak
13 years ago at 11:35 amHa ha, have a good time going 6-7 this year. If you’re lucky you’ll get to lose to Toledo in the PapaJohns.com Bowl. Cry Baby
13 years ago at 1:20 pmIt’s his second fucking year. My God you’re stupid.
13 years ago at 2:00 pmDan Mullen hazing TSUN every year. FaF.
13 years ago at 10:14 amStealing TSUN from Woody Hayes? TFTC?
13 years ago at 11:58 amDan Mullen refusing to say O** M***. Only referring to them as TSUN. and marrying a hot ex Golf Channel reporter. TFM
13 years ago at 8:47 pmGreat column leading into week 1…
13 years ago at 10:26 am