The 10 Frattest College Football Coaches

In no particular order…

Derek Dooley

 

Hello there, inferiors. My name is Derek Dooley and my swoop is flawless. Before I decided to embark on coaching college football, I was busy putting GDIs in jail for the fun of it. Damn right, I effectively combined two of the most frat professions in life, law and college football. Is it a coincidence that I coach at Tennessee and my son is named Peyton? Hell no. It’s called tradition. I take pride that the Vols are the only decent athletic program in the entire state. If you don’t agree, I’ll sue you on false pretenses.

    1. Fratological Studies

      That’s like trying to send Walter Payton to the Pro Bowl of 2012 to start at RB. Sorry you’re a retard.

      13 years ago at 1:06 pm
    1. the fratness monster

      I agree with this, taking a shitty team like K-State and turning them into a good football team. TFM.

      13 years ago at 11:42 am
  1. the fratness monster

    Lane Kiffin and Mack Brown? That’s just embarrassing, Kiffin hasn’t done a damn thing except piss everyone off, which I guess is considered fratty? Mack Brown has all the talent in the world and still gets hazed by the lesser talent that Bob Stoops has. Oklahoma has good players, but not as many as Texas yet Brown still gets paid the most even thought he has only won 2 Big 12 tiltes. Embarrassing.

    13 years ago at 11:38 am
    1. USS Hazer

      Remember that little thing called a BCS National Championship? Yeah… he’s got one of those too.

      13 years ago at 1:23 pm
    2. Dabos3

      Yeah he has better players because he’s a better recruiter retard..that’s part of coaching. And hazed by Stoops? Mack Brown has won 4 of the last 6 head to head. Good argument though…

      13 years ago at 1:36 pm
    3. the fratness monster

      Mack Brown is NOT a good recruiter. The state of Texas produces the most D1 football players out of high school, so naturally they want to play for the most prestigious football school in their home state, which is UT. Generally, the best D1 prospects from the state of Texas go to Texas (look at their roster). Any idiot could recruit great players to go to a prestigious school like UT.

      Let’s go down the list to prove why I have a “good argument.”
      Stoops: 1 national title, 7 Big XII titles, Brown 1 national title, 2 Big XII titles
      7 > 2
      I might add that Oklahoma had to go through TEXAS 6 out of 7 times to get those conference titles, 7 if you count when they reached the conference title in 2003 (a loss to K-State).
      Stoops: 2 Heisman winners, Brown: 0 (Ricky Williams shouldn’t count, as Brown did not recruit him).
      Stoops: 0 losing seasons, Brown: 1 losing season (at Texas?)
      Brown hasn’t been able to coordinate a running game for many years if you don’t count their QBs doing the running.
      Stoops’ overall record versus Brown (7-4), that was honestly the dumbest fucking argument you could make Dabos.
      Don’t bring up the bowl wins argument, Texas was playing in the holiday and cotton bowl while Oklahoma was playing in BCS games, for a majority of those games. Last time OU played in the Cotton bowl they killed Arkansas, and beat Oregon in the holiday.
      Mack Brown is actually a fraternity man, but Stoops is from the state that is home to Miami University, Mother of Fraternities. He should be on this list, not Lane Kiffin.
      BOOM

      13 years ago at 7:28 pm
    4. Sack and Trapster

      Dabos3, you should probably drink a glass of bleach or jump off the nearest building. the fratness monster and Stoops own you now.

      Boomer Sooner.

      13 years ago at 1:19 pm
  2. TotalFratFarmily

    I know I’ll get crucified for this because of the school he coaches at but Chip Kelly is a bad ass and a damn good coach.

    13 years ago at 11:39 am
    1. EvanCHILLiams

      He’s pretty FaF because most of his stars come from TX. I have to admit, Oregon is a force.

      13 years ago at 11:28 am
    1. Cowbells and Pearls

      Married to a golf reporter. Single-handedly bringing a football program back to life after Croom tanked it. Only wearing visors. Creating a brotherhood-like mentality between the players, seen especially when one of them tragically passed away last year. Convincing the school to over haul the stadium and getting the money donated from alumni. Putting rivalry first and constantly degrading TSUN. Supporting the greek system by having lunch at every house last season. TFM to me.

      13 years ago at 9:23 pm
  3. Fraternity Man

    Howard Schnellenberger sucks dick.

    Signed,

    OU fans and current students old enough to remember 1995.

    P.S. Stoops belongs on this list. Listen to him haze retarded local media sometime, it’s good stuff. Plus he terrorized the Big XII and Clappy Mack’s favorite-playing ass for most of last decade.

    13 years ago at 12:50 pm
    1. Tijuana Frats

      Bob Stoops= 6-6 in bowls all time 3-5 in BCS bowls. Howard Schnellenberger= 6-0 in bowl games and 3-0 in what would be BCS bowls if they were called that then, including being offensive coordinator for the undefeated dolphins while Stoops bitch ass was still in pop warner. The pipe outfrats Stoops any day of the week in any category.

      13 years ago at 1:44 pm
  4. GeorgiaNole

    Jimbo Fisher isn’t on this list… His name is fucking Jimbo and if you have heard him talk then you’d know he’d be a shoe in for this list.

    13 years ago at 1:17 pm