The GOP Field: Real Time Frat Analysis
An in depth Real Time Frat Analysis of the remaining GOP contenders.
Rick Perry
You want to like what he’s bringing to the table. Exaggerated Texas accent, super cliché in normal conversations, shot a coyote while jogging… Looks decent on paper, but unfortunately, part of the process requires debates. Debates require talking. Talking requires a thought, which I believe requires synapses to fire in the brain. I’m not questioning his capacity, but I am questioning his ability to put together a coherent thought under pressure. He’s been reduced to piggybacking off of others’ responses during the debates. Seriously, he’ll just shout shit out to get some airtime. I respect that. Talking out of turn is an underrated frat move. I think most people subscribe to this rule: if when you talk during a debate, I have to turn away because I don’t like watching people poop their pants, I can’t support you. Look, sometimes you get in over your head, and Rick has found himself in this position. He’d be like the guy that gets appointed to an exec position just because everyone likes him. Good face guy, he means well, but there’s a good chance he’ll spray diarrhea all over the bed when shit gets real.
Huntsman 2012.
Oh wait…
13 years ago at 10:09 pm🙁
13 years ago at 12:20 amI believe Ron Paul is the only candidate in this race that’s an initiated member of a social fraternity. Lambda Chi Alpha, I believe.
13 years ago at 10:14 pmNo Rick Perry AGR
13 years ago at 7:39 amI’m sorry but if a candidate being in a fraternity is criteria for you to support him then you’re the exact same as all the blacks voting for Obama because of his race.
13 years ago at 5:22 pmBob Corker 2016
13 years ago at 10:26 pmRon Paul 2012. Liberty gives me boner.
13 years ago at 10:26 pmI will never vote for Mitt. Newt 2012
13 years ago at 10:36 pmAgreed!!
13 years ago at 10:47 pmRon Paul is the only one that actually stands for freedom. Newt wants to turn our country into a nanny state and Mitt is the true definition of a RINO.
13 years ago at 1:51 amOh come on, if Mitt’s the candidate are you really gonna sit at home and not vote or are you still gonna vote for him just to get Obama out of office?
13 years ago at 10:04 amLet’s vote for the real conservative in the race. One that can actually win a general election. One that has actually balanced a budget, passed welfare reform, can get bi-partisan agreements and is a true Reaganite. NEWT GINGRICH 2012.
13 years ago at 10:41 pmWell said, sir! Frat the fuck on!!
13 years ago at 10:48 pmgingrich trails by 5% against obama. check out the head to head polls with obama and only paul or romney can really win.
13 years ago at 10:55 pmOf course he’s trailing now. We’ll see how he’ll be more competitive with his support in the SC and FL primaries. Romney currently cannot beat Obama in most of the polls. I can’t see someone like Paul who is somewhat weak with foreign policy win the GOP ticket. We should try to keep him in the GOP race as long as possible so he doesn’t run as an independent. We need someone who has actually accomplished what conservatives ask for. That’s why we need someone like Speaker Gingrich. NEWT 2012.
13 years ago at 11:05 pmRon Paul won’t run independent because that would be a TperotM and fuck our chances. Plus, the GOP would be inclined to take out some anger on his pussy son Rand.
13 years ago at 11:10 pmOh, sure, if “real conservative” means supporting TARP, supporting an individual mandate, wouldn’t cut a single dime from any of the Departments, and would, in his own words, assassinate foreign scientists in countries we haven’t declared war on.
Please, Newt wipes his ass with the Constitution.
13 years ago at 10:21 amI did an internship with Paul, met his whole family, and I can tell you they’re easily the most genuine people I’ve ever met. He’s got my vote obviously.
13 years ago at 10:50 pmRon Paul 2012
Ted Cruz for TX US Senate
btw are any of the others in Fraternities? I know Paul is a Lambda Chi and Perry is a GDI. Santorum dresses FaF but he would go to war with anyone and it’s fucking scary. Romney says stupid shit without his teleprompter and reminds me of how Nixon was in debates. Newt is a narcissistic prick so I feel like Paul is the only one worthy of being our next “A”
13 years ago at 10:54 pmOh so you did an internship with him? And his family is really genuine, you say? And holy fuck he was a Lambda Chi! Wow you really convinced me on this one, shithead.
13 years ago at 11:08 pmIf he gets the republican nomination, he’ll definitely beat Obama. Democrats can’t vote in primaries, but I guarantee he’ll recruit an enormous amount of votes from registered democrats in the presidential election… I’m talking landslide
13 years ago at 3:02 pmNewt is the man!
13 years ago at 11:04 pmNever voted to raise taxes. Never supported TARP or any kind of government healthcare scheme. Never voted for an unbalanced budget. Voted to get Osama. Voted against Iraq. Predicted 9/11 years before it happened. Called the recession years before, giving the exact reasons. Has made “Audit the Fed” a GOP talking point.
I can list more reasons you should vote for Paul, but those by themselves should be enough.
13 years ago at 11:26 pm^He knows.
13 years ago at 11:55 pmRon Paul has gone on record and said that he wouldn’t have authorized the raid that took place to get Osama in pakistan last year. Also voted against raising the debt ceiling, and while I think we definitely need to get that shit under control, anybody who knows anything about economics knows that would have been terrible. Fact checks, bro
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEE3X4mt5yY
13 years ago at 12:50 amOh thanks, forgot that one: Never voted to raise the debt ceiling. Oh, and I know a thing or two about economics. Liquidation of debt and facing fiscal reality trumps borrowing more to pay interest.
13 years ago at 10:11 amPaul stated that he would have held him for interrogation and if it was fruitless he would have killed him. Honestly, that would be a more beneficial outcome in the long run.
13 years ago at 7:27 pmMarco Rubio is the next Reagan, and the future of the party. I can’t wait until he saves the country in 2016.
13 years ago at 11:42 pm^ Fucking this. Marco Rubio is the best. I met him a month ago. Great guy, great story and a damn good Republican. Everyone down here in South Florida is fucking begging Newt to choose Rubio as a VP if he gets the nomination.
13 years ago at 11:54 pmhttp://www.csmonitor.com/USA/Politics/The-Vote/2011/1007/Marco-Rubio-for-vice-president-He-says-no-and-for-good-reason
Good luck with that, speed racer.
13 years ago at 12:10 amThanks for telling me what I already know. I never said that he’d run for VP. I just said that everyone down here wants Rubio for VP.
13 years ago at 12:16 amA Spanish, career politician from Florida is going to save the country? Umm, O.K. chief. Sure thing.
13 years ago at 9:02 am