The Latest Gronk Video Is Weird As Hell

Alex Buscemi10 years ago

The latest video of Rob Gronkowski is straight up bizarre. Everything about the short film noir is filled with what-the-fuckery. The highly sexual, disembodied voice speaking over slow-motion footage of Gronk stretching. The roman gladiator armor. The recordings of old school football games spliced with clips of Gronk running on a beach with ladies wearing bikini tops and “Get Gronk’d” bottoms (Okay, that part is actually kind of dope).

I don’t know, man. The whole thing is clearly geared for a female audience, but it gives me the heebie-jeebies. The article that the video accompanies, published in DuJour, is also pretty weird. It contains about two full paragraphs describing Gronk eating a steak, comparing the intensity with which he eats to his intensity on the field.

A massacre has just occurred at a ritzy restaurant in northern Miami. The assassin — a man-beast of 265 pounds with a tree-trunk-thick neck — is sawing mercilessly into the pile of bloody flesh.

*Shudders*.

[via a href=”http://dujour.com/lifestyle/rob-gronkowski-patriots-pictures-interview/” target=”_blank”>DuJour]