The Official 2016 Not Frat Bracket: Round Of 32

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The West Coast Region

#1 Cargos vs. #9 Steve Holt

Wow. This truly is a battle for the ages. While everyone reading this site is aware that cargos are the most NF shorts there are, casual TFM readers aren’t able to fully comprehend just how NF TFM writer SteveHolt is. Do some research here before casting your vote.

#2 Safe spaces vs. #7 Fedoras

This guy perfectly sums up our feelings with regard to safe spaces.

Think about this, though — technically if you wear a fedora you’re always in a safe space, as people are not going to come in close proximity to someone so tragically fashionless. Makes this matchup a little more interesting.

#3 PETA vs. #6 Incest

“Is it more NF to dislike having sex with animals, or to like having sex with your blood relatives?” is an avant-garde way of choosing a winner in this matchup.

#5 Longboards vs. #13 Skintight jeans

Longboards barely made it into the round of 32, narrowly edging out Slacklining by a mere 50 votes. Skintight jeans, meanwhile, are riding high after upsetting #4 condoms (somehow). Do the nut-hugging hipster pants have a shot at another heartbreaker? Methinks the chances of that are lower than the sperm count of a skintight jeans wearer.

Go to the next page to vote on the Midwest Region

      1. Fratty McFratFrat

        When we see “Incest” we push the button. There’s no logic involved, just primordial instinct.

        9 years ago at 4:36 pm
    1. Edgar_Allen_Bro24

      How am I supposed to vote while I poop if it doesn’t work in the app?

      9 years ago at 4:02 pm
  1. Tall Can Sam

    As a Mizzou student, I hope safe spaces pull off the upset and win it all. Cargos will be a pretty tough opponent, though.

    9 years ago at 4:10 pm
  2. What Is Haze Prevention

    Rigging the bracket to put Steve holt against cargos knowing that we can’t vote against cargos, therefore making Steve feel better. NF.

    9 years ago at 4:11 pm
  3. Goat Lives Matter

    By the transitive property, if Natty Light is the most frat thing to do then sobriety should be the most NF to do right? At minimum it should beat out veganism.

    9 years ago at 4:38 pm
    1. SharkWeekTFM

      By the “which one wins” property you’re saying veganism is MORE FRAT than a state you are in a considerable amount of time. Is sober you therefore less frat than a drunk vegan person? Nope. I have confidence you’re a pretty frat individual.

      Also I’m still pretty damn sober after only 1 natty.

      9 years ago at 5:44 pm
  4. JohnnyPaul52

    How the hell did poetry slams beat crocs? Not to say poetry slams are frat, but still.

    9 years ago at 4:42 pm