The Walton County Sheriff’s Office Wants You To Know Destin, FL Is NOT Your 2016 Spring Break Spot
Two weeks ago, we reported that Panama City Beach banned alcohol on its beaches in the month of March to thwart unruly spring breakers from soiling their good name and turning their resort town into a hedonistic drug, alcohol and fornication fest. Then last week, we recommended seven alternative spring break destinations to PCB, one of which being just down the road: Destin, Florida. Destin, the quaint, quiet, family-friendly vacation spot is not known for the wild behavior you typically see in Panama City Beach.
Today, we received a snarky as fuck letter from the Walton County Sheriff’s Office, with the intent to let us — and all of you — know that if you’re thinking of booking your spring break trip to Destin next March, you motherfuckers better think again.
Below is that salty letter we received via email.
Edit: The Patrick Kane reference was just pointed out to me. This guy’s too good.
So snarky, right? I love this letter. Such attitude. They get the point across, too. It was effective. All beach-bound spring breakers have officially been put on notice. The virgin beaches of Destin, Florida will remain virgin as the Walton County Sheriff’s Office has thrown away the key to its spring break chastity belt.
You demented college kids are still free to act like caged horny alcoholics who are set free on the beach for one week per year, but you’re not doing it in Destin, and you’re not doing it on the watch of the Walton County Sheriff’s Office.
“By the looks of your comments you don’t have much support among your comrades anyway.”
This is 100% true, but to be fair, sir, we never have their support..
P.S. Hey Fratrick Kane, get a fucking map, idiot. Have you even been to Whale’s Tale, dude? You’re making us look like morons.
To his credit he’s called us a “fraternity” and not a “frat”
10 years ago at 6:06 pmHe wouldn’t call his country a cunt would he?
10 years ago at 10:53 amStop.
10 years ago at 11:28 amThe sheriffs department is quite the opposite of a fraternity .
10 years ago at 6:08 pmWell, fuck those guys.
P.S. The cab ride reference is in my bio, Dorno, this guy didn’t make it up on his own. Have you even read my profile, dude? You’re making us look like morons.
10 years ago at 6:13 pmBy the looks of the comments on their Facebook page one would think you wrote an article about hosting a satan convention there.
10 years ago at 6:46 pmDestin, you’re fucked.
10 years ago at 6:28 pmFrat lives matter.
10 years ago at 6:47 pm“Michael A. Adkinson, Jr., Sheriff”
10 years ago at 6:53 pmA.? Funny, could’ve swore this guy’s middle name was Buzzkill.
“Illegal drugs (edibles)” looks like we have to use some old fashion powdered drugs
10 years ago at 6:54 pmI know plenty of fratty people who have gone to Destin for spring break in the past. The Sheriff should realize that majority of those people at Panama City are not typically fraternity members and if they are they’re probably lower tier Yankees trying to take advantage of dixieland’s nice weather, women, and water. If anything, I would make Destin Greek only and provide a couple bars away from locals so that everything’s contained, and usually Greeks tend to clean up after themselves so that’s a plus too.
10 years ago at 7:01 pmDude, shut the fuck up.
10 years ago at 8:22 pmDestin isn’t even in Walton County.
10 years ago at 7:02 pmFrom personal experience, these guys seriously take their jobs far too seriously. If you’re caught, you’re brought to one of their on-the-go Fuck mobiles while they trash talk your debauchery with their buddies.
10 years ago at 7:16 pmIf they happen to read this, fuck that mole faced deputy, I’ve still got beef with you shit slinger.
Hunt him down and fuck his wife.
10 years ago at 6:34 amYour thoughts have been taken into consideration, challenge accepted sir.
10 years ago at 3:08 pm