This Ranking Of The Most Patriotic States In America Is…Interesting

The World Cup may be over, but America still has an Independence Day to celebrate, which means we have one more day to unite under the Stars and Stripes before we all go back to calling each other gay, hipster, atheist, child murder advocates and fundamentalist, woman hating, child murder advocates. At least the one thing we can all agree upon is that kids should die, now if only we could decide whether it should be by guns or abortions.

But hey, screw it, let’s start arguing now, specifically over who loves America the most. That seems productive.

Movoto Real Estate collected data from all 50 states and came away with a ranking of what they believe to be the most patriotic states in the country. Here’s the map and the list:

patriotic-states

table

Sort of a weird ranking, considering most of their top 10 states tried to, this one time, you know, leave the United States forever. That isn’t to say a lot can’t change in 150 years, it’s just a bit ironic that South Carolina, the first state to secede, arguably the most enthusiastic state about secession, and the state that fired the first shots against their countrymen, is somehow the most patriotic state in the Union. Is this the largest case of Stockholm Syndrome ever recorded? Is South Carolina the Rihanna to America’s Chris Brown? You could ask those same questions about the entire southeast in general, actually.

That’s all (mostly) in jest, of course. Southerners are about as patriotic as they come here in the states, even if a lot of them own two very conflicting flags. Regardless, I love them for it.

While the south being the most patriotic might be ironic, it certainly isn’t a surprise. Neither is seeing California come in dead last at number 50. As much as the rest of the country likes to give Texas crap for considering itself its own country, there is no other state that gives less of a fuck about the rest of the USA than California, and it’s not even close, really. Texans — mostly native Texans — love to talk about how great Texas is. Californians — especially transplants to California — have full on verbal circle jerks about where they live.

The rest of the results are kind of random. Maine, for example, is second. Sure? It doesn’t seem wrong, so whatever. Also, it looks like Movoto confused Missouri, Michigan, and Mississippi and switched their rankings. Missouri is at 20, Michigan at 45, and Mississippi at 36.

Agree? Disagree? Wanna fight about it?

[via Movoto]

  1. North Brokota 1793

    MN is the second least patriotic state but has the best voter turnout? Are you positive this ranking didn’t mix up the meaning of the words patriotic and stupid?

    10 years ago at 3:00 pm
  2. Kappa Significant

    Great voter turnout in Wisconsin. Only problem is Milwaukee is so full of “them” that we’re fucking blue every time.

    10 years ago at 3:11 pm
  3. ABetaCDEF

    I love my state, but there are way too many Californians who take for granted that they live in the god damn greatest country in the world. They need to have their freedom taken away before they appreciate what they have.

    10 years ago at 3:18 pm
  4. Consummate Degenerate

    I refuse to believe fucking Jew York is more patriotic than Mississippi.

    10 years ago at 3:39 pm
    1. StarShieldandLamp

      I moved to NYC about 18 months ago for a marketing job, I’m not a huge fan of all the foreigners, but surprisingly they rep the USA more than you would think. Seriously American Flags are everywhere, and on holidays like the 4th you’ll see everyone in Manhattan with some type of red, white, and blue on.

      10 years ago at 8:05 am
  5. sandiegobubbles

    I only celebrate 4th of July so I can drink non American alcohol (aka tequila) and hit the floor before midnight like a drunk Cinderella. Fuck the California transplants.

    10 years ago at 4:28 pm
  6. myuniversitiesfratstar

    Hmm, no surprise the traditional liberal states are less patriotic than the traditional conservative states.

    10 years ago at 5:18 pm