THROWBACK THURSDAY: 2013 Wife Mock Draft
12 years ago

Maggie Cross

Screen shot 2013-01-25 at 11.02.32 AM

School: University of South Florida
House: Top-tier hotties
Major: English
GPA: 3.6
Hair color: Natural redhead
Height: 5-9
Weight: 128 lbs

Pros:

-Mom is a certified MILF.
-Circle of friends average 7.3 on universal hotness scale.
-Loves sports and competition. Academic All-American golfer.
-Got a boob job her sophomore year.
-Viewed as a sexual conquest by 97% of males on campus.

Cons:

-Child of divorce.
-Rumored to have a sex tape.
-Moderate daddy issues.
-Considering joining the Peace Corps or ACLU after graduation.

Projected: Mid-2nd round

Outlook: Being overlooked by several, considering her liberal worldview. The potential is definitely there. Could prove to be a steal in the 2nd round, as her ceiling is as high as anyone’s coming out this year.

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    1. TheChampionsTour

      This is the original. Take a lap and when you’re done with that, go to Chipotle and get me a chicken burrito. No fucking beans.

      12 years ago at 3:52 pm
    1. fratteo

      It’s a THROWBACK THURSDAY column. Clearly was not written after Cunt Punt went viral.

      12 years ago at 7:12 pm