Tiger’s Ex-Wife’s Boyfriend Whips Out His 164-Foot Yacht, Parks It Next To Woods’ Smaller Yacht

Remember when I posted the story about Tiger’s chances at the Masters skyrocketing by way of slumpbuster? Well, I take it back. All of it. He just got mindfucked so irrevocably hard by billionaire yachting enthusiast Chris Cline, the current boyfriend of Woods’ ex-wife Elin Nordegren.

In a power move to end all power moves, Cline parked his 164-foot yacht directly next to Tiger’s 155-footer in a euphemistic dick-measuring contest like the world has never seen.

From Daily Mail:

The 33-year-old beauty’s rumoured new boyfriend, billionaire coal magnate Chris Cline, parked his 164-foot yacht directly in front of her ex Tiger Woods’ 155-foot yacht on Florida’s Jupiter Island Monday.

How does one even reserve a spot like that next to Tiger? I guess when you’re billionaire Chris Goddamn Cline, you get what you want. He probably slipped the former yacht slip occupier a cool 10 grand for the spot and sent him on his way with a wink and a shoulder pat.

There is always the 2014 Masters, Tiger. The memory of this defeat will be too fresh for such a tightly wound competitor like yourself. No way you’re going to be able to chip with the thought of your beautiful ex-wife having a blast with Cline’s 164-footer dancing through your head.

1

Wait, what’s the name of Cline’s boat?

Screen shot 2013-03-20 at 5.14.41 PM

Is it Mine Games? Well, he is a coal mining tycoon, so it makes sense, but clearly this name now has dual meaning. Cline just yacht-slapped the world’s most famous athlete and has a perfectly named vessel on top of it. Who is this guy?

Fucking Mine Games. Just amazing.

Screen shot 2013-03-20 at 4.19.19 PM

Cline 1, Tiger 0

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[via Daily Mail]

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    1. The_ChiIis_Guy

      ^^L2Read.

      He said it was his favorite thing he wrote, not that was ever written.

      12 years ago at 5:44 pm
    2. PhiPsiPhrat

      I think Dorn just said that his favorite thing he’s ever written is about two guys comparing their proverbial dicks.

      12 years ago at 6:58 am
  1. BroManChu

    Bubba Watson would drive a ball over both of those fuckers with one hand, and a shoulder injury.

    12 years ago at 3:48 pm
    1. FrattingInMySperrys

      That’s like 100 yards I could’ve done that in the 5th grade pussy

      12 years ago at 5:18 pm
    1. Nice Try

      I’ll explain for those of us who are slow: Tiger Woods is famous, Chris Cline is not. I’ll take fame and skill over 9ft of yacht space.

      12 years ago at 4:13 pm
    2. ReaganKA

      I’ll explain my point for a retard like you: Anyone can become famous in this country. You don’t need to have talent or skill. Who cares if more people know Tiger? Cline is plowing Tiger’s ex-wife and he has more money than Tiger. He also is superior to Tiger for another obvious reason.

      12 years ago at 4:31 pm
    3. Nice Try

      I can tell you’re too obsessed with Cline’s dick to convince you otherwise, but I’m going to respond anyways. Yes, you don’t need talent to become famous, but Tiger is and does. Also, Cline is banging Tiger’s sloppy seconds. So sloppy in fact Tiger banged hundreds of porn stars and strippers while he was married to her. I’m pretty sure he doesn’t give a fuck who she’s with. As to who cares? Hundreds of millions of people care. TFM cared enough to post a story about where his ex-wife’s boyfriend parked his boat. And you cared enough to read it.

      12 years ago at 5:12 pm
    4. WtF_

      I don’t get why people want to be famous so badly. I’d rather be rich and have my own life, than be rich and have everything I do documented for the entire world to see.

      12 years ago at 6:09 pm
    1. Frat Me Maybe

      Judging by Tiger’s past escapades, I’m pretty sure he likes to “park in the back.”

      12 years ago at 7:43 pm
    2. ReaganKA

      ^don’t ever write gay shit like that on one of my posts. and kill yourself for having that as your name.

      12 years ago at 12:52 am
  2. Fort_Fraterdale

    “It’s not the size of the yacht, it’s the motion of the ocean,” says the guy with the small yacht.

    12 years ago at 3:57 pm
    1. ThinkThereforeFRAT

      It’s not the size of the yacht or the motion of the ocean. It’s whether the captain can stay in port long enough for
      his passenger to get off.

      12 years ago at 6:06 am
  3. DJango_Chained

    This is like me whipping my dick out in the restroom all the white boys tremble

    12 years ago at 3:59 pm