Today is Flag Day AND National Bourbon Day AND the U.S. Army’s Anniversary, How Are You Not Drunk Yet?
You probably knew it was Flag Day, since you’re a Goddamn freedom loving American. What you MIGHT not have known (if you did, you’re awesome, drink on) is that today is also National Bourbon Day. I’ve been sitting here for twenty minutes trying to wrap my head around how intensely I need to celebrate this glorious union of holidays. I got so worked up that I had to have a glass of bourbon just to calm myself down. If you aren’t drinking bourbon and saluting a flag right now, I suggest you do so.
God bless bourbon, and more importantly, God bless America.
Carry on.
[h/t to reader Reagan is my brother]
UPDATE:
It is also the anniversary of the founding of the United States Army.
Excuse me while I go blackout.
[h/t to reader Teddy Brosevelt]
TITS
12 years ago at 1:59 pmYou forgot one, Bacon. It’s also the day that the U.S. Army was founded in 1775.
12 years ago at 2:04 pmwell done^
12 years ago at 2:15 pm^^ I have to quote Bacon in this one, I’m pretty sure that he mentioned the U.S Army in this sentence, “Today is Flag Day AND National Bourbon Day AND the U.S. Army’s Anniversary, How Are You Not Drunk Yet?”
12 years ago at 3:29 pm^I updated the title after Teddy pointed out my exclusion of the Army anniversary.
12 years ago at 4:44 pm^^BITCH!! HAHAHAHA OWNED!
12 years ago at 4:48 pm^you should probably shut up before you get shot
12 years ago at 6:42 pmIt’s also the anniversary of the Roswell incident.
Bourbon + America + the Army + Aliens? I’d watch that movie.
12 years ago at 6:49 pm^I’d asphyxiate myself while I jacked off to that movie.
12 years ago at 7:24 pmYes
12 years ago at 3:45 pmIts my birthday. Thats the 4th best thing about today.
12 years ago at 4:55 pmThis is the kind of stuff this section should be about. Well done brothers.
12 years ago at 8:41 pm