Top 5 TFM TV Characters: Part 1
14 years ago

TEXAS—Today we analyze and discuss the top five current television characters that embody everything that TFM stands for. They may be fictional. Some may not be Greek. Hell, some may no longer be on the air, but they are all Frat as Fuck. In no particular order, here are the five frattiest men of television.

1. Carter Pewterschmidt—Family Guy

Peter Griffin’s father-in-law and owner of U.S. Steel; he is an old money conservative with an estimated wealth of over $7 billion. He is a member of the Skull and Bones, and plays poker with the likes of Bill Gates, Michael Eisner, and Ted Turner (whom he despises). He employs illegal immigrant laborers to maintain the landscaping of his frat castle, and believes homosexuals should be deprived the right to vote. He dislikes his daughter’s middle-class husband to such an extent that he offered him a $1,000,000 check to never speak to her again. He is a war veteran, has an addiction to sleeping pills and alcohol, and believes the secret to happiness is money.

“You can have five dollars, if you pick it up from this jar with barbed wires and salt.” – Carter Pewterschmidt

Carter Pewterschmidt hazes France:

Carter Pewterschmidt hazes Peter:

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    4. Steelshot

      Jeremy Piven (the actor that plays Ari Gold and doesn’t have to do much acting) is a Pike. Hate all you want, he’s FaF.

      14 years ago at 4:30 am
  5. The Fraternity Lifestyle

    I’m sorry, I just cannot put anything regarding Alec Baldwin in the same sentence as FaF.

    14 years ago at 2:18 am
  6. greg marmalard

    remember Theo from the cosby show? he wanted to be a male model. thats pretty fuckin fratty if you ask me

    14 years ago at 3:37 am
    1. ....wow

      seriously?? honestly though, if you want to talk kids shows, look at boy meets world. Coreys dad, Alan, was FaF and a badass

      14 years ago at 3:43 am
  7. Breau Shackshard

    Why the Fuck has Barney Stinson been left off the list. He is Legendary.

    14 years ago at 5:36 am
    9. the more south

      Well obviously because he never gets any slampiece action. Way to play the race card black panther.

      14 years ago at 8:21 am
    10. Frat Hard or Bro Home

      Lets be real here, Carlton doesn’t pull the most girls, but in his case quality over quantity should be respected. When he does pull slampieces, they are fine.

      14 years ago at 9:44 am
  10. FrozenFrat

    Michael Weston – GDI

    Sam Axe – FaF

    Knocking down rich slampieces and getting drunk at 8am is always frat, plus I have never seen him without boat shoes.

    14 years ago at 10:11 am
    1. Merry Fratmas

      Michael Weston taking down an entire corrupt organization within the gov’t is FaF

      14 years ago at 1:51 pm
    3. FrozenFrat

      That was mostly my point, as well as the fact that he’s hopelessly attached to her, he’s not out looking for new slampieces.

      Oh, and sam always has some buddy from somewhere to solve problems, being connected is FaF

      14 years ago at 8:41 am
    4. A-PhiNominal Future Housewife

      Michael Westen DID slam Fiona. I agree that Sam is mostly MORE frat, but Westen’s Oliver Peoples sunglasses?… FaF

      14 years ago at 8:30 am
  11. JRK_1839

    Real Top 5 Faf TV Characters

    1. Carter Pewterschmidt
    2. Ari Gold
    3. Barrny Stinson
    4. Kenny Powers
    5. Charlie Harper
    Honorable Mentions: Nucky Thompson, Andy Benard, and Don Draper

    14 years ago at 10:53 am
    2. Southern Proper Lady

      Don Draper will never be an honorable mention. Ever. Move Barney Stinson to honorable mention and replace with Donald Draper as third place.

      14 years ago at 11:19 am