Top 5 TFM TV Characters: Part 1
14 years ago

TEXAS—Today we analyze and discuss the top five current television characters that embody everything that TFM stands for. They may be fictional. Some may not be Greek. Hell, some may no longer be on the air, but they are all Frat as Fuck. In no particular order, here are the five frattiest men of television.

1. Carter Pewterschmidt—Family Guy

Peter Griffin’s father-in-law and owner of U.S. Steel; he is an old money conservative with an estimated wealth of over $7 billion. He is a member of the Skull and Bones, and plays poker with the likes of Bill Gates, Michael Eisner, and Ted Turner (whom he despises). He employs illegal immigrant laborers to maintain the landscaping of his frat castle, and believes homosexuals should be deprived the right to vote. He dislikes his daughter’s middle-class husband to such an extent that he offered him a $1,000,000 check to never speak to her again. He is a war veteran, has an addiction to sleeping pills and alcohol, and believes the secret to happiness is money.

“You can have five dollars, if you pick it up from this jar with barbed wires and salt.” – Carter Pewterschmidt

Carter Pewterschmidt hazes France:

Carter Pewterschmidt hazes Peter:

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    2. Peyton Fratting

      Bruce Wayne is actually pretty fratty; he inherits old money, has a great auto collection, owns women, is jacked, and owns a giant corporation. However Tony Stark is way frattier in his demeanor.

      14 years ago at 8:23 pm
    3. The Colt

      Dating Russian ballerinas and supermodels, buying restaurants, throwing a party for Harvey Dent with the richest people in Gotham, driving Ferraris (and the Batmobile), and kicking the Joker’s ass after he lights a huge pile of cash on fire. Bruce Wayne is FaF.

      14 years ago at 9:26 pm
  8. 3,2,1 south should have won

    I know this is from a movie but Nick Naylor from thank you for smoking is FaF! Spokesperson for big tobacco and slams who he wants when he wants. He also can talk his way out of anything, smokes and drinks constantly and hazes congress

    Also gonna throw a random one out there but he is by far the most legendary hazer, Dexter Morgan. Plus he got to slam Julie Benz and Julia stiles.

    14 years ago at 2:16 pm
    1. fraternizing with the bronemy

      when they do a movie list Nick Naylor should be towards the top with Gordon Gekko

      14 years ago at 2:39 pm
    2. GodFrater

      second on Dexter Morgan. The hazing and slampieces are certainly enough to make him frat

      14 years ago at 11:09 pm
    3. Lucky Strike

      Second to everything wholeheartedly except Julia Stiles. She looks like shit. Dexter, however, is the fucking man.

      14 years ago at 6:02 am
    2. Van Fratton

      “To be the man you have to beat the man” “I live in the biggest house, in the best part of town. I got a limo a mile long with 25 women in it”!!!! Fuck yes, Ric Flair counts.

      14 years ago at 5:07 pm
    3. postgradfratty

      I’m a limousine ridin’, jet flyin’, kiss stealin’, wheelin’ dealin’ son of a gun.=FAF

      14 years ago at 9:50 pm
    4. fraternizing with the bronemy

      i dont want to be one of those grammar scouring assholes but how the fuck did you get accepted into university if you cant spell “tights”, its a one syllable word. “wwwwhhhhoooooooooooo! nature boy!”

      14 years ago at 11:38 am
    6. fraternizing with the bronemy

      haha understandable my good man, happens to the best of us, frat balls over christmas break…

      14 years ago at 12:28 pm