Top 5 TFM TV Characters: Part 1
14 years ago

TEXAS—Today we analyze and discuss the top five current television characters that embody everything that TFM stands for. They may be fictional. Some may not be Greek. Hell, some may no longer be on the air, but they are all Frat as Fuck. In no particular order, here are the five frattiest men of television.

1. Carter Pewterschmidt—Family Guy

Peter Griffin’s father-in-law and owner of U.S. Steel; he is an old money conservative with an estimated wealth of over $7 billion. He is a member of the Skull and Bones, and plays poker with the likes of Bill Gates, Michael Eisner, and Ted Turner (whom he despises). He employs illegal immigrant laborers to maintain the landscaping of his frat castle, and believes homosexuals should be deprived the right to vote. He dislikes his daughter’s middle-class husband to such an extent that he offered him a $1,000,000 check to never speak to her again. He is a war veteran, has an addiction to sleeping pills and alcohol, and believes the secret to happiness is money.

“You can have five dollars, if you pick it up from this jar with barbed wires and salt.” – Carter Pewterschmidt

Carter Pewterschmidt hazes France:

Carter Pewterschmidt hazes Peter:

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    1. lake fratasu

      Chum Lee from Pawn Stars is F as shit. I’m kidding of course, but the Old Man is definitely old school frat.

      14 years ago at 9:09 pm
  4. Dollie

    DENNY CRANE!
    Quite frankly, I’m offended he did not make top 5. If you don’t know who Denny Crane is, then you can never be a true frat star.

    14 years ago at 2:09 am
  5. Dollie

    I’m really outraged that Denny Crane and Don Draper were beat by a cartoon. Geeds, I can’t even concentrate on making good sandwiches now.

    14 years ago at 2:10 am
  7. Cosmo

    Kramer, seriously. The assman, he smokes cubans, he cant play at public courses, his wardrobe, his attitude in general. Cosmo Kramer=TFM. and when he wore jeans, they were wranglers. FaF. Cosmo Kramer should be above kenny powers. kp, although i love him, is the spitting image of a gdi.

    14 years ago at 12:28 pm
    4. Buck Farack

      bowling shirts and cargo shorts are outweighed by cocaine use, and woman beating.

      14 years ago at 8:09 pm
  9. John L. N. Hunt

    What about Nuckey Thompson from Boardwalk Empire? He’s a Republican, City Treasurer, Slams any piece that he wants and Whiskey connoisseur.

    14 years ago at 8:25 pm
    2. fratourage

      Ari Gold is frat as fuck, hazes employees and lets everyone know he has more money than them and doesnt give a damn about it. Not to mention his hott ass wife

      14 years ago at 9:46 pm