Unexpected Celebrities That I’d Love To Party With

WJ Cope9 years ago

I’ve seen my fair share of lists of famous people that would be fun to party with, and they always include at least one, if not more, of the usual suspects: Will Ferrell, Keith Richards, FDR, etc. For this article, I’m going to shy away from all the obvious, shoo-in picks and instead opt to identify some unexpected candidates for a party. I’m also going to stick with real people who are currently alive for this particular piece. Other than that, anything goes.

Martin Shkreli/Charlie Sheen

Charlie Sheen is probably on many peoples’ lists already, but pair him with Martin Shkreli and you’re sure to have some awkward exchanges. In one corner, you’ve got the man who recently made the news for contracting HIV. In the other, you have a guy who’s drug company made headlines for hiking up the price of an HIV drug late last year. No matter what your stance is on the whole issue, you’ll probably agree that this is a pairing that can’t be missed.

Gary Johnson

Most well-known for calling Donald Trump a pussy (several times), Gary Johnson is the Libertarian Party nominee for POTUS in 2016. It’s quite apparent that the guy has some brass balls on him, and I can only imagine what a couple of drinks would do to his already aggressive demeanor. Johnson was also known to use medicinal marijuana in the late 2000s to recover from an injury, so you know he’s at least somewhat 4/20 friendly.

Ted Cruz

Teddy has to have some free time on his schedule after dropping out of the race. The main reason I want to party with this guy is to see how his already-punchable face contorts once he’s put a few drinks back.

Plaxico Burress

The former Giants wide receiver caught a lot of media attention a few years back when he accidentally shot himself in the leg at a nightclub when his pistol went off in his sweatpants. This sort of nature would add an air of tension to the party, while also giving you a guest who is a sweatpants-at-the-club kind of guy.

Nic Cage

I am a firm believer that Nic Cage has more to offer at a party than almost any other human to walk the planet. Getting him to shout “NOT THE BEES!!!” after a few drinks would place that night among the greatest I’ve ever seen. Cage is likely a total wildcard when he’s drunk, and the other guests would be walking on eggshells not to piss him off and cause something resembling one of his on-film freakouts. You can say it’s acting all you want, but it just seems to come so naturally to him.

Anthony Bourdain

Bourdain clearly went hard back in his day, and comes with the added bonus of having an in with every bar and club in the country. Nobody is going to turn him down.

Macaulay Culkin

Culkin has definitely seen some shit, and would be the go-to for controlled substances at the party. Even better if he can bring along the robbers from the Home Alone films.

Ozzy Osbourne

Bringing Ozzy along would give everyone the added challenge of just trying to keep up with his consumption. Trying to get to the level that he’s at all the time would probably put most people on the floor..

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