University Dean Receives Students’ Fake IDs After Mailroom Confusion

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Have you ever sat in class and contemplated the many different paths some of your classmates had to take to be accepted and enroll into your university? Some of these dipshits aren’t qualified to wash the weekly turd out of the showers, much less sit in a college classroom and pretend there is an ounce of intelligence in their barren craniums.

A Pennsylvania college student inadvertently outed himself as one of those questionable admissions after having a box of fake IDs from China shipped to the university mailroom. Unfortunately for the foolish student, he happens to have the same name as a dean at the university. The mailroom staff had a 50/50 shot at correctly depositing the package in the student’s mailbox. Instead, it wound up in the hands of the dean — and a student’s worst nightmare commenced.

From Philly.com:

“You can’t make this up,” Radnor Police Superintendent William Colarulo said of the similarity in names that lead to the discovery.

The incident came to light when the unidentified dean opened a package from Guangzhou, China, that contained a small lime-green picture frame. Further examination discovered eight realistic – but fraudulent – identification cards made for four 18-year-old male students inside the back cover. The dean contacted authorities.

If there is any glimmer of hope for the implicated students, the police have yet to charge them with a crime. Despite having their parents contacted, they may escape this with a slap on the wrist from the school.

Just so it’s noted, the school has offered them counseling for their issue. What exactly you can counsel a kid on for seeking to possess false identification is not exactly clear to me, but I’m sure the always intelligent university administrators know what’s best.

Image via Shutterstock

  1. Fraiking

    What does he live in the same building the Dean’s office is in? What kind of shithole College is this?

    10 years ago at 9:57 am
  2. delteagle

    Sounds like the plot to a Straight-To-Netflix Van Wilder spin off without the original cast.

    10 years ago at 9:58 am
      1. broseph061991

        Hey! Ryan Reynolds has gone on to make some amazing films! like Green Lantern……oh wait all of his movies suck. nevermind

        10 years ago at 9:33 pm
    1. Oral Hershiser

      This is dumb. There are tons of deans at every university or college. Show me a student who is aware of all of them, and I’ll show you a humongous nerd who didn’t mail order a fake ID from China.

      10 years ago at 12:04 pm
      1. crotchlog

        I’m sure if there was a dean with the exact same name as me, I would be aware. Especially if i was having a package of fake IDs mailed to the university mailroom

        10 years ago at 12:35 pm
      2. Oral Hershiser

        Why would you be aware if someone whose position you have no reason to be aware of even existing has the same name as you? I mean, I guess if your real name is crotchlog, OK fine, you win. But otherwise your confident is misplaced. (Misplaced confidence: TFM. Touche, crotchlog!)

        10 years ago at 3:41 pm
  3. Dornos_Parole_Officer

    They can’t be charged with a crime since it’s not illegal to own a fake ID per se. It’s only illegal once you try to use the fake ID to purchase goods like alcohol, tobacco, or firearms.

    10 years ago at 11:03 am
    1. ProudPhi2042

      I thought this as well for a while. However, it’s illegal to simply possess any falsified government-issued identification. Having the ID alone can be a felony in a number of states.

      10 years ago at 12:29 pm
      1. Taco12PackGuy

        Well technically since it was delivered to the wrong person, he never possessed it. Getting off on a technicality and receiving “counseling.” TFM.

        10 years ago at 12:39 pm
      1. JohnnyTaxReturns

        No he’s right, if the information is true but the documents are false it’s a lesser charge, at least in some states.

        10 years ago at 3:10 pm
  4. JD the Risk Manager

    He may still be in luck because when I got mine, if they were seized or not delivered, they’d resend them

    10 years ago at 11:15 am