University Of Minnesota’s Special Teams Practice Consists Of Picking Up Chicks, Complaining About The Wind, Etc.

Being a kicker is one of the best positions in all of sports, behind being the backup quarterback. Are you still technically a starter? Check. Minimal work? Check. Minimal effort? Check. Probably someone of European descent or someone who didn’t play actual sports growing up, like soccer? I guess that counts for something. The University of Minnesota’s specialists posted their practice routine on Twitter to show just how little work they have to put in.

Yeah man, go “nuke punts” like you’re getting ready for World War III. “Complaining about the wind” seems like the most kicker thing that you can say. When things go wrong? It’s the wind’s fault, even if you’re kicking indoors. You have to get a shit ton of curls as a kicker, apparently, so that you have something to talk about when you “talk about chicks.” And everyone knows nothing gets a girl more wet than “watching Jeopardy in the locker room” after a long day of doing nothing. Kickers just have a rough life.

  1. Reagonomics_

    Why do you still bother contributing to this site? You fucking suck. Please be the next person to contract Ebola

    11 years ago at 1:38 pm
  2. Sailgating

    It’s all fun and games until you fuck up the game winning field goal and start receiving death threats.

    11 years ago at 1:40 pm
  3. DarrensDad

    Fuck you Durant. I thought you had contracted AIDS from the source after getting fucked by a monkey in Africa and the world was a better place because of it. Have some damn dignity and die of auto-erotic asphyxiation like a real man.

    11 years ago at 1:41 pm
  4. party_on_garth

    Who the fuck are you calling nerds, Durant? You look like an inbred Old Navy model. Fuck yourself.

    11 years ago at 3:14 pm
  5. AllinTheHips

    Thank you for listing everything they do right under the list of things they do. It was a little unclear the first time I read them, but the second time through really cleared things up.

    11 years ago at 7:37 am