University of Tennessee Pikes Love to Shove Stuff Up Each Other’s Asses, No Really
There are a lot fucked up drinking trends. There are the kids that pour vodka into their eyeballs so that their parents won’t smell the booze on their breath. There are people who drink hand sanitizer, I assume to experience the nightmare world of drunk trailer park hobo. And then there are the people who do the butt stuff. Those people now apparently include Pikes at the University of Tennessee.
Alexander Broughton, 20, was dropped off at UT Medical Center around 1:30 a.m. Saturday, Knoxville Police said.
Hospital staff told investigators that Broughton was in critical condition and unresponsive when he arrived, with a blood alcohol content level above 0.4, which is considered toxic and potentially deadly.
Broughton has since been discharged from the hospital, according to UT Medical Center.
Investigators went to campus and found several other people, including three men, passed out at the Pi Kappa Alpha (“Pike”) house.
After conducting several interviews, investigators determined the fraternity members had been using rubber tubing to give each other alcohol enemas. Police said the practice heightens and speeds up the process of alcohol entering the blood stream because it bypasses filtering by the liver.
Why? Just why? How does one’s thought process take them from “A” to “B-hole,” so to speak. Essentially these kids wanted to know what it was like to feel really drunk, a feeling I’m fairly confident they were already very familiar with, so they decided to shove beer bongs or whatever up each other’s asses.
“Man, you know what would make this night awesome? If you played with my asshole until I’m an inch away from death!”
How long did the police officers laugh at you? I would pay good money to hear you explain this to your parents.
Reevaluate your social lives.
[Source]
What’s the quickest way to get a Pike off your porch?
12 years ago at 3:27 pmPay for the Pizza.
Come on now, a little chilihole chug never killed anybody..
12 years ago at 3:41 pm…thanks to the campus medical staff.
12 years ago at 9:31 pmI’m starting to lose faith in humanity
12 years ago at 4:02 pmTsteve-oM
12 years ago at 5:28 pmone*. Laps taken.
12 years ago at 6:04 pmid rather get harpooned in the dick than rush pike
12 years ago at 7:57 pmHarpooned in the dick or Buttchugg with the roid-ragging bros….is there any real difference?
12 years ago at 8:50 pmthey were drinking PBR…Pikes Butt Rippin’
12 years ago at 9:32 pmThese fucks make us look bad.
12 years ago at 10:00 pmCorrection, all you fucks make you look bad.
12 years ago at 10:59 pmGAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
12 years ago at 12:21 amFalse accusations, notice it just says investigators believe…. there was no evidence. Last time I checked we live in America and we’re innocent until proven guilty. However we will enjoy our new castle, funded by the lawsuit against UT and UTPD for slander and numerous other violations of privacy. BTW, for all you other so-called Pikes who are throwing us under the bus, our brother is ok. Thanks for asking, Geeds.
12 years ago at 1:30 amThanks for the update Mary Poppins.
12 years ago at 3:51 amOh okay, we’ll definitely stop talking about it now.
12 years ago at 8:10 amMy god you are delusional
12 years ago at 8:23 am^ Jesus, this haha. You’ll be lucky not to lose your house let alone get a new one.
12 years ago at 9:48 amya but this is too gay to make up, just admit it, your a damn pike and you wish you weren’t right now
12 years ago at 10:01 amActually, I’m there is evidence but the investigators don’t want to look down there…
12 years ago at 10:38 amsure*.
12 years ago at 10:39 amDude, glad to hear your brother’s okay. But no matter what happens, you guys aren’t going to be able to pull out a beer bong at a party for a long time without your guests wondering where the hell that thing’s been.
12 years ago at 10:49 pmTruth
12 years ago at 10:55 pm