We’re Gonna Be Alright
No matter which turd in the toilet you chose to be President, America is going to get a huge Trump enema for the next eight years. I was leery of him at first, you know, because he’s a fucking lunatic, but at the end of the day, he’s better than Hillary.
That’s something everyone needs to embrace, as America finally becomes the reality TV show we were always destined to be.
Everyone thought everything would go to shit overnight if he got elected. But you know what? Everything is fine. The economy is fine. Republicans control the House and Senate. Hipsters are in the street, protesting like useless pussies. It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood.
One of the first things Trump did was shit on the Trans-Pacific Partnership, the secretive slutty multinational trade deal that would have undermined American sovereignty and given global corporations massive power. You know Hillary would already be on her knees for that shit.
He won’t build a wall. The wall is an impractical waste of money that wouldn’t do shit to stop drugs or illegal immigrants because the cartels all use tunnels anyway. Walls don’t stop moles.
He said he’d build a wall just to secure the votes of the really stupid and the really racist (aka the majority). He understands how dumb democracy is. Do you?
What I’ve learned from Trump is that America is #1 and everyone else can go fuck themselves. Sure he says dumb shit every time he opens his mouth, but his heart is in the right place. He knows he’s the baddest motherfucker on the planet now and he’s not afraid to tell people how he really feels.
He’s the exact asshole we need to combat the rising tide of feminism and cultural PC hipster herpes that is rotting our freedom of speech to the core. Trump isn’t afraid to grab America by the pussy and bomb the shit out of anyone who isn’t us. Sure he says some idiotic shit, but he’s not afraid to call a spade a spade.
Now that Trump is President, I’m not afraid of the PC police anymore. Now I can talk about whatever I want, whenever I want. I can show up to a restaurant at 7 a.m. with my drunk asshole friends and rant about how lesbians all secretly dream of dick. If anyone has a problem with my loud, idiotic ranting, I don’t have to apologize and promise to keep my voice down..
People disagree with lesbians secretly dreaming about cock? Learn something new everyday.
8 years ago at 5:38 pmThe wall just got 10 feet higher because you decided to write this piece of shit.
8 years ago at 5:52 pmReal easy for white America to believe this, maybe not so much for the rest of us
8 years ago at 6:21 pmThat’s racist
8 years ago at 6:49 pmMove to Canada pussy
8 years ago at 7:11 pmLike how white people were terrified Blacks and Muslims would overtake the country in 2008? You’ll be ok, of course jokes will be made. And racists and misogynists will feel emboldened, but they won’t do shit, frankly I’m more worried about liberals ruining my life by jumping to conclusions and not thinking shit through, blocking roads and rioting.
8 years ago at 7:14 pmYou are stupid
8 years ago at 7:47 pmFucking victim mentality right there. Father was an illegal immigrant (now a citizen. Pays taxes and didn’t mooch) and he still voted for trump because he was/is tired of this PC bullshit. You think you can’t rise the ranks? My dad slept at work because where he actually lived was too far and he didn’t have a means for transportation except on the weekends when the homeowners could pick him up. We’re an arguably middle class family now. You will only reach as far as you think you can. Mother fucker
8 years ago at 3:18 amI don’t know why you’re replying to my comment I was calling Nickgoff2 stupid, I voted for Trump
8 years ago at 10:38 amI don’t know what it does for the website but I just click on the most recent comment to reply since in those long chains, it looks the exact same on a phone.
8 years ago at 3:14 pmThis “article” is all sorts of stupid
8 years ago at 6:35 pmThis is horrible don’t write an article about politics if you’re dumb at least just write a retarded list so I know not to click on it, like Wally.
8 years ago at 6:36 pmCalling the majority or republican voters “really stupid and really racist” is a bold move when the majority of your readers tend to lean right
8 years ago at 6:48 pmIt’s how the democrats lost the election.
8 years ago at 6:55 pmand the senate
8 years ago at 6:56 pmand the house
8 years ago at 6:56 pmand any hopes of having a liberal advantage on the supreme court
8 years ago at 6:56 pmNot just the election. It is the reason trump became what he is. People voted for a change.
I think South Park sums it up perfectly when Mr. Garrison tells PC principle, “you created me”, and then proceeds to make him suck his dick.
8 years ago at 8:29 pmTheir inability to read their readership is why this website is a shell of its former popularity.
8 years ago at 11:39 pmHe’s not going to be in office for 8 years, it’ll be 4, then he will run for re-election. Secondly, you say “he said he’d build a wall just to secure the votes of the really stupid and the really racist (aka the majority). He understands how dumb democracy is.” Whether or not he’ll build a wall is debatable, and I personally do not think he will, but you are kind of stupid for claiming a majority are really stupid and really racist. Are you a fucking democrat with your high school level of writing proficiency?
8 years ago at 8:35 pmWhat’s stopping him?
8 years ago at 2:44 amFreeFrabst. #weremember Fuck you Dorn.
8 years ago at 9:16 pmI’m always in the shadows. Watching, waiting patiently. Kinda like Dorn at his nephew’s birthday party.
8 years ago at 5:18 amJesus
8 years ago at 5:57 amSo is PC Principal gonna go and we get principal Victoria back?
8 years ago at 9:56 pmWhat’s the over/under some feminist website picks this up and writes one of their novel-articles ranting about how this is proof the U.S. is a racist patriarchy and now that Trump is president, rapist frat boys are going to run wild. Oh well, looks like I just wrote their headline.
8 years ago at 10:14 pm