What My Perfect Foursome Looks Like
Have you imagined what your perfect day of golf would look like? Mine? A nice 80-degree day, little to no wind, sunny skies without a cloud in sight, and zero hangover from the night before. My group of four would be teeing it up at golf’s most majestic course, Augusta National, where we’d have some beers, have some laughs, and hopefully lose zero balls. When you’re settling in for 18 holes with three other people, you need a primo group. This is who mine would include.
Jordan Spieth
This one is a no-brainer. He’s probably on every guy’s list for their dream foursome. Who wouldn’t want to play a round with the guy that ripped through the Masters at the young age of 21? The perks of playing with one of the world’s current greatest golfers are endless. Maybe you can pick up a few tips and drills to improve your game. God knows I could use some help with putting from 10+ feet. What’s your secret, Jordan?
Another perk would be that when you’re playing with someone who is exponentially better than you at something, you try harder. Maybe I’m more locked in than ever during this round and end up shooting the round of my life. Either way, I’m going to end up playing up to my competition, rather than down. The best bring out the best in you. That’s just science. Lastly, he’s the only youngster in my group, so I need someone who I can relate to a little better. Would I be riding with him in the cart? Nah. That’s too much pressure to put on my game.
George W. Bush
Every group needs that guy who can keep things light when the round starts getting tense. Maybe Spieth and I have started saying “Merry Christmas” to one another when someone makes a 30-foot bender for birdie. Things can get heated if you’ve got the competitive fire like Spieth and I do. That’s where W. comes in. His light-heartedness and jovial demeanor are something that can make the day go from good to great in an instant.
Whether he’s talking about stopping the terrorists and telling us to watch his drive, or he’s cracking jokes, Bush is a must-have in your dream foursome. His stories will delight you and his jokes will take your mind off the terrible shot you just duck-hooked into the woods. He may not be the best golfer in the foursome, but he’s the guy that every group needs to keep things fun and light.
My Late Grandpa
The last member of my foursome would be none other than the man that got me to fall in love with the game in the first place, my late grandfather. Growing up as a child, he would take me to his stomping grounds, Oakmont Country Club, and he’d let me ride in his cart while he played. Carefully teaching me the intricacies of the game, such as golf etiquette, tips on putting, etc. After each round, we’d go play putt-putt so I could actually do something. He passed away before I could ever play a round of golf with him, though, which is why I’d love to get the chance to play with him now.
I imagine that he’d be riding shotgun in my cart, telling me all of his old WWII stories — he was a POW in a Nazi concentration camp for a period of time so you know he’s seen some shit — while sneaking in a lesson or two on how to make sure I’m connecting with the ball squarely every time. Just an all-around great guy who loved and respected the game of golf just as much as he loved his country.
I’d definitely finish last in this grouping, but it’d easily be one of the best days of my life..
Title had so much more potential than the article written
9 years ago at 10:36 amHarrison, this isn’t your idea of a perfect foursome. You lied. Your idea of a perfect foursome is you getting ass fucked by the Panther’s backfield.
9 years ago at 10:39 amI’ve had that happen a few times before…
9 years ago at 10:53 amBut who knows what comes next? Fivesomes, sixsomes, shit maybe even sevensomes.
9 years ago at 10:41 amDrinking beer on the course in Augusta? I feel like the only acceptable drink if any would be scotch
9 years ago at 10:52 amTry less
9 years ago at 11:01 amMy perfect foursome is Megan Fox, Margot Robbie and Dorno’s mom
9 years ago at 10:58 amJohn Daily and Jay Cutler are a must. And I’ll throw in Charles Barkley for laughs.
9 years ago at 11:19 amJohn Daly and Jay Cutler are a must. And I’ll throw in Charles Barkley for laughs.
9 years ago at 11:20 amBut what about John Daly, Jay Cutler, and Charles Barkley?
9 years ago at 12:31 pmI’d throw him in for laughs.
9 years ago at 1:37 pmSpieth, Conan O’brien, Emily Ratajkowski
9 years ago at 11:22 amOakmont Country Club. TFM
9 years ago at 11:29 amPaige Spiranac, Charlotte McKinney, Kevin Hart. Two blonde bombshells, one who actually plays golf, and a funny guy who is also short as fuck and won’t pull the ladies away from me.
9 years ago at 12:34 pmJesus, JFK, Bill Murray.
9 years ago at 1:36 pm