TFM users

What’s The Matter With You People?

TFM users

What’s the matter with you people? While you, the readers of TFM, are wishing heinous death threats upon us and detailing unholy acts of which you’d like to perform on our mothers, the readers of PGP are out here telling us about their days and hoping my allergies clear up.

Thanks for the phone call, Kevin.

I’m open to any theories you guys feel like throwing out about why PGP Kevin is such a gentle soul but TFM user “Booger_Sugar” is a complete asshole. And it’s no anomaly. Each respective site representative is a solid example of the user bases as wholes. It’s an absolute mess in here, whereas the waters of PGP are as calm as could be. Every day.

PGP: “Hey guys, this is Kevin.”
TFM: “Fuck you, Dorn.”

PGP: Podcast listener shares relatable, funny tidbit about his day.
TFM: Readers trash the site, its writers, the writers’ families, and everything they believe in.

PGP: “Dillon, I hope the allergies get better, man.”
TFM: “Dorn touches little boys.”

PGP: “Have a great day. Bye.”
TFM: “Your site is going to shit.”

Subscribe to Touching Base on iTunes for generic guy humor. No centric theme. Just three plain white guys in a podcast studio having a few laughs.

P.S. Never change because I love you all dearly.

  1. The User Formerly Known as Frabst

    You know what will satisfy the people, Dorn? Lick my butthole.

    8 years ago at 1:21 pm
  2. smithpm

    Take some medicine for your allergies. Preferably all of it at once. I hear 100 doses of both Benadryl and Allegra brings a rapid response.

    8 years ago at 1:32 pm
  3. DavidWooderson

    I was gone for about two months. What is this news I hear about boosh being gone?

    8 years ago at 2:07 pm
    1. FraternalColonel

      Boosh and Fat Tits Dan caught Dorno getting frisky in a Chuck E. Cheese bathroom and got canned

      8 years ago at 2:37 pm
  4. Pete_Jones

    Dorn is just defending the new writers because Grandex gets a tax break for hiring Wally.

    8 years ago at 2:09 pm
  5. Drunk Chris Berman

    So it’s our fault that Fail Friday is always late, Boosh and Dan are gone, y’all have horrible writers, and Babe of the Day is gone? Hope you get canned next, chode

    8 years ago at 2:14 pm
  6. Purdue_Peter

    You seem like a guy who pokes his ween through his boxer shorts while “making love.”

    8 years ago at 2:33 pm
  7. Coolnamewastaken

    Want to know what’s wrong – rush boobs, IBOTD, horrible content, deleting accounts to protect intern slam, insulting the audience, fails, top comments, etc.

    Constructive advice – we aren’t complicated. Give us boobs, funny content and fraternity-related news, the rest is filler. I don’t give a damn about “5 reasons why” anything nor do I care about JayZ and Kanye.

    8 years ago at 9:48 pm