Why Every Girl Should Give Blow Jobs, From A Girl’s Perspective
10 years ago

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Recently, there has been some debate on the merits of cunnilingus. The boys at TFM first published “Why Guys Should Not Be Required To Go Down On Girls,” which TSM followed with “Why Girls Should Not Be Required To Give Blow Jobs.” Then, PGP rebutted with “Why Humans Should Never Have Sex With Each Other, Ever.” Why so stingy, people?

I’m here with an opposing view, and yes, this is from a girl, so there’s no mind trickery here. I believe every girl should give blow jobs. Yes, you heard that right. I believe every woman should give blow jobs, and here’s why.

  1. He’ll brag to his friends that he actually has the coolest girlfriend ever.
  2. If you think it’s a “requirement,” you’re doing it wrong. Going down is fun.
  3. Nothing will make him happier with less time or effort.
  4. Seriously though–that look on his face. Can’t beat it (pun intended).
  5. It doesn’t make him less of a man or her less of a woman to finish orally. Bringing a man to orgasm without even having to undress him is fucking powerful.
  6. Besides, even if you don’t finish that way, a little foreplay never hurt anyone.
  7. Can’t. Get. Pregnant.
  8. He’ll have such an adrenaline rush and feel like such a man that he’ll open those jars and change your oil happily. Oh, and he’ll probably “change your oil,” too, while he’s at it.
  9. You thought that reaction was good? See what happens when you bring him a sandwich after.
  10. Let him finish on your face and you’ll look years younger. Literally.
  11. Going to the gym later? No worries. Swallowing gives you all the health benefits of a protein shake. Besides, spitters are quitters.
  12. When he goes up, the toilet seat goes down.
  13. He’ll be much more likely to get down on one knee if he knows you’re willing to get down on two.
  14. There’s actually nothing degrading about getting him to worship at your feet.
  15. You reap what you sow.

There you have it, ladies and gentlemen. I’m not sure why you’re still reading this. Get to work, people.

  2. my2cents

    old chic here……married forever and a day — happily……word to the guys, if she doesn’t now, that ain’t gonna change so ask yourself if you want to be with someone long-term who won’t, but keep in mind the concept of ‘you scratch my back, i’ll scratch yours’……..word to the ladies, for most guys there is absolutely nothing you can do that will make him happier, and if he knows that’s a regular thing at home he won’t risk going elsewhere…….just sayin’……..and for all the sillies commenting ‘that’s gross’ and ‘if you do that you a skanky ho’, two words — grow up (can you imagine how you would feel if you asked him to do something sexual and his response was “eww” with a scrunched up face??)

    10 years ago at 4:00 pm
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  5. kendali

    The fact that I’m only seeing yall say gfs/bfs not wife and husband I’ll stick to what I’m doing and that’s not giving head everyday and I’ll get married before u , some of yall just disgusting have u ever thought if ur girl is actually good at it how many boys she had to go down on before u to perfect it???? Ummmm

    10 years ago at 10:38 am
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  8. slushfund

    Numbers 3, 7, 9, 10 and 11.
    The list is golden but those should be named The Five Commandments.

    10 years ago at 5:05 pm