Why I’m Still a Republican
13 years ago

Over the weekend Missouri Representative Todd Akin made absolutely inexcusable remarks, which you’ve probably heard by now, about abortion and rape. It was just another case of a high-profile Republican talking out of his ass without considering the consequences. Of course this led to an all out thrashing of the right from the left, and probably slated Democrat Claire McCaskill to the US Senate for another term.

In my mind, the GOP is in its darkest days. I’ll be straight up – I’m a fiscal conservative and a social liberal. As such, I’m going to issue a challenge to all Republicans. Shut your goddamn mouths. You are not elected into public office to spew your idiotic morality speech to the mainstream. You are elected to protect and defend the Constitution of the United States of America. I couldn’t care less if you’re a Christian, Muslim, Jew, Buddhist or Martian. Our country is in a ten-foot deep, mile-wide shit hole. Praying, hating gay people, cursing the left, being pro-life, pro-family or pro-whateverthefuck isn’t going to fix the problems we have right now. Some politicians may argue that this country is where it is because we “lost our values.” I say bullshit. We are where we are because we started caring too much about our values. Our values are OUR values, no one else’s. Keep that shit to yourself.

Defend our country from financial obliteration. Stop turning everything into a right versus left debate. Sometimes there isn’t a right answer, which is why this country has been locked in an abortion debate ever since the Roe v. Wade decision. There’s not a right answer to everything. Abortion is not a political issue. It is a personal opinion. Most abortions are done by way of a pill taken in the weeks after conception, but fervent pro-life supporters would like you to think that the doctor sticks a clothes hanger up there, twists it around and pulls out a kicking fetus. Abortion is a dirty word, but it’s not what most politicians would like you to think it is.

But back to why I’m still a Republican… I’m still a Republican because I believe at the heart and soul of the GOP it is a party founded on the belief that all Americans are given the right to live their lives in the pursuit of happiness with minimal government intrusion. It is a party that believes in the Constitution of the United States, and a party that believes war is an act of desperation, not intimidation.

I assume roughly 95% of you who read this site align yourself with the Republican party, and I can guarantee at least half of you are doing it for all the wrong reasons. A political party is a political party because of politics. Not religious affiliation, personal beliefs, or where you were born.

This is not an endorsement or condemnation of Mitt Romney or any other Republican political candidates. It’s bigger than that. It is a call to action. To stand up for what the Grand Old Party used to stand for.

Everyone deserves a chance to succeed.

The government shouldn’t solve all of your problems.

Religion and personal preference should not influence our laws.

This is not the country I was born in and it is certainly not the country I want to die in.

So, to the politicians (and to everyone) that represent my party, think about everything I just said next time you open up your mouth in a political debate. You can call yourself conservative all you want without giving any reason as to why, but if that’s the case then in reality you’re no better than the hippie on the street corner obliviously banging on his bongos.

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Follow me on Twitter @ChampsTourTFM

  2. Banging7gramrocks

    TV shows like Jersey Shore and Teenage and Pregnant are enough of a reason support abortion. If you can’t or don’t want to support a baby then abort the damn thing. You can always have that baby later on in life when you are better prepared. I also don’t want to have to deal with your shitty offspring years from now. If only we could sterilize the people from these MTV shows and welfare recipients. Imagine how much nicer this world would be.

    13 years ago at 3:27 pm
    1. WhoDatFrat80

      I am pro life but you did just put up a great damn point. I wish there was a genocide of the stars and the religious viewers of MTV, VH1 etc.

      13 years ago at 6:32 pm
  3. True American

    This is a great explanation of what is wrong with America today. I agree with you 100%, that people need to stop forcing values on each other, and that the best path to prosperity is a government that does not interfere with capitalism and individual liberties.

    13 years ago at 3:34 pm
  4. FratInTheHat12

    In my opinion, the economy outweighs any social issue, be it abortion, gay marriage or what have you. I couldn’t personally find two fucks to give about what people chose to do with their lives. When the well-being of the US of A, and the world along with it, for that matter, is at risk due to the economic policies of a raging socialist, I do give a fuck. Lots of them. This is why the Republican party is the one that I will always vote for. Free market, business growing, capitalism is the only way to keep the world from going six feet under. Look at France. Two months of socialism and they’re already set back for twenty years. We joke about “R-Money”, but personal wealth aside, Romney-Ryan will get the country back to where it needs to be. If you want gay-marriage, vote Barry. I don’t give a shit if Romney is anti-gay marriage. He knows how to run a business, plain and simple. That in itself is worth a vote.

    13 years ago at 4:17 pm
  6. CharlesFratMoskowitz

    The majority of our generation could give a fuck about gay marriage, abortion, and weed – three sticking point social issues that for some dumbass reason people actually decide a vote one.

    First of all, no President is going to decide what is and what isn’t Constitutional. You should vote on fiscal policy, foreign policy, and defense. That’s why I’m Republican, not because I think Jesus will be sad that you gave your slam Plan B.

    13 years ago at 6:44 pm
    2. ItPaysToHaze

      Couldn’t have said it better myself, sir. If you give a fuck if gay people get married or someone you don’t know get’s an abortion, or if someone smokes weed, you are giving far too many fucks.

      13 years ago at 12:12 am
    3. This Too Shall Frat

      ^Agreed with all of the above except about abortion. If you actually believe a fetus is a person, abortion is murder. Murder deserves a fuck given

      13 years ago at 9:39 am
    4. MuleFratter

      ^^ Giving fucks about other people’s personal habits. NF. NF atall.

      Keep your fucks in your pockets, reckon.

      13 years ago at 1:05 pm
  7. Haze W

    I have an awesome idea, how about you go blow Will McCaboy and Aaron Sorkin. I agree with half of it, but you trying to tell people they’re wrong in their belief is just hypocritical to everything you said.

    13 years ago at 7:38 pm
  8. JudgeFraterson

    Solid read. To anyone wishing to not tag themselves with LIbertarian for having “middle of the road” beliefs… it’s called being a MODERATE.

    13 years ago at 9:16 pm