X Gon’ Give It To George Zimmerman

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The notorious ex-neighborhood watchman George Zimmerman has agreed to take part in a celebrity boxing match next month, according to promoter Damon Feldman.

His opponent? DMX.

I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried.

For those of you who don’t know, George Zimmerman was the pretend cop who fatally shot 17-year-old Trayvon Martin in 2012.

It was a huge ordeal, and although Zimmerman was charged with second-degree murder and manslaughter, he was acquitted last July. Zimmerman has since become the infamous poster boy for racism and brutality across the country. But he’s a free man, so now I guess he’s considered a celebrity. That’s how things work nowadays.

Feldman is paying Zimmerman, along with whoever is chosen of the nearly 15,000 applicants who have reached out with interest to join him in the ring. For what it’s worth, Zimmerman will supposedly donate his proceeds to charity. It is reported that last week, rapper The Game (who clocks in at 6 feet 4 inches and 240 pounds) challenged Zimmerman on TMZ Live, but that Feldman declined.

That being said, Zimmerman, who is 5 feet 7 inch, has been training recently. I, for one, would have loved to see The Game fuck him up. I personally think the guy is a pig, but we try not to get too controversial or political here at TFM. We tend to leave that to washed-out rappers and racist neighborhood watchman.

Enter DMX into the conversation. (Let it be known, these are his actual quotes.)

“I am going to beat the living fuck out him.”

Right on, DMX. Fuck yeah. Looks like we found our guy.

“I am breaking every rule in boxing to make sure I fuck him right up.”

Couldn’t have said it better myself. I love your passion and intensity.

“Once I am done with him, I am going to whip my dick out and piss on him.”

Whoa, take it easy, X.

“Right in his motherfucking face.”

Too far, dude. Too far.

“Zimmerman is a piece of shit and that’s what he needs to drink.”

Well I maybe understand your logic now, I guess…

Keep in mind that DMX is 43 and Zimmerman is 30.

This is not a done deal, but as of Feb. 5, it was reported that DMX still wanted to talk money. I think the verbal agreement to go all R. Kelly on him seems contractually binding enough, but that’s just me.

For the record, DMX’s supposed net worth is -$10 million. Yes, you read that right, negative ten mill. Like the opposite of $10 million. So hey, beating the shit out of Zimmerman could maybe sell a couple extra records next time he releases something.

DMX sees this as an opportunity of retribution for “every black person who has been done wrong in the system.”

However, Feldman disagrees. “We’re not looking at it as a race thing … We haven’t discussed purple, yellow, white, black.”

The three-round match is set for March 1 and it should be one for the ages.

Zimmerman has stated he wants to fight Kanye West, for, ironically enough, attacking “defenseless people.” I’m sure we’d all love to see Yeezus and Zimm duke it out.

If you want a shot, email fightgeorge@hotmail.com for your chance to fight Zimmerman. That’s right, they even made a Hotmail account for this. Shit’s legit.

Of course, we will keep you updated as this story unfolds. Never fear, TFMers, we’re here for you.

[via Billboard, TMZ]

Image via def sounds

  1. Gob Bluth II

    Why is a liberal writing for this site? You really think Zimmerman was guilty or at fault?

    11 years ago at 3:31 pm
    1. SaltwaterFrat

      Yes, research ‘Stand Your Ground’ in Florida and then make a real legal argument. Deadly force was excessive force by Zimmerman in his case, not to mention he was told to not approach Martin.

      11 years ago at 8:19 pm
      1. StudlyAtEverything

        “Stand your ground” wasn’t even brought up by Zimmerman’s defense. When you are getting your head bashed into the cement at the same time a MMA fighter is raining haymakers down on your face, you pull your piece.

        11 years ago at 8:39 pm
      2. SaltwaterFrat

        Its slang for the degree of self defense allowed. Either way Zimmerman is at fault because he engaged Martin, after he was specifically told not to. If you pick a fight, start getting your ass handed to you, then pull a gun and shoot someone any other time in the US it is voluntary manslaughter. When you take a concealed carry course they stress that harder than just about anything. Nothing Liberal or Conservative about it, an idiot started something he couldn’t finish then killed a kid over it.

        11 years ago at 10:30 pm
      3. khalid1994aziz

        false. yes, it was true that Zimmerman was told not to engage, but the altercation happened closer to zimmerman’s car than when he was told to stop following martin. That means that martin ambushed him, as he was going back to his car, which is what Zimmerman testified. If the body was moved postmortem, i’m sure some forensics techie would have noticed something.

        11 years ago at 2:08 am
      4. StudlyAtEverything

        No laws against following someone. He was a volunteer community watch person. As a firefighter, I don’t just go when it’s convenient for me. I go when the call comes in. He was just doing what he felt was right to do. And dispatch has no authority to tell you something that you must comply with.

        11 years ago at 7:04 am
  2. better_than_you

    Fuck this article and fuck you. Your dad should have blew his load up a hogs ass instead of in your mothers smelly cunt.

    11 years ago at 3:50 pm
  3. Peyote Swag Monster

    Why the fuck is this guy writing for this site? He’s a fucking dumb ass and a raging liberal. Get him the fuck out of here.

    11 years ago at 4:01 pm
  4. JohnFratYatesSommers

    I’m glad this is so relevant to fraternity life. Quality news we got here.

    #BringBacktheForum

    11 years ago at 4:07 pm
  5. Jimmy Russell

    Speaking of former “Florida police officers”, I wonder how Ricky Rozay feels about all this?

    11 years ago at 4:18 pm
  6. Carlos Spicyweiner

    “I personally think the guy is a pig.”
    Who asked your opinion you liberal, redwood humping fuck?

    Who the fuck is letting reprobates like this sad sack of human debris write columns for this site?

    11 years ago at 4:32 pm