You Won’t Buy This Entire Town In West Virginia
Ever wanted to lord over your own private collection of simpering peasants? Now you can! Apparently the NSA is auctioning off a whole town in West Virginia.
From Yahoo Money:
An entire town, which was once part of the National Security Agency’s massive surveillance operation, includes 80 single-family homes, a fire station, a swimming pool and a bowling alley in picturesque rural West Virginia, is up for auction with bids starting at $1 million.
Tucked into an isolated area surrounded by the George Washington and Jefferson National Forests, the town is less than three hours from Washington, D.C. but could hardly be more divorced from the bustle of the capital—your cell phone won’t even work there. The town is located in the United States National Radio Quiet Zone, a federally designated area in which electronic communications are strictly regulated.
For the right buyer, the possibilities are endless. Sure, you’d need to have at least $1 million in cash to start, but you don’t go into the monarchy business without sizeable reserves of capital. Plus, if you were thinking less lord and more super-villain, the location is fantastic: only three hours from Washington DC. A perfect spot for a lair/missile base/laser shark aquarium. You’d have ready housing for your henchmen, and a bowling alley to keep them from revolting over those stupid uniforms you make them wear.
Personally, I’d use the place for some real life Hunger Games for the pledges, or maybe as an artillery range.
Sadly, the area will probably just get bought by something boring like a church. Wasted opportunity..
[via Yahoo Money]
Image via YouTube
No bid.
9 years ago at 4:33 pmWe should come together and buy this town. Then we can send Intern Shitbag there so she can have a “nice, quiet place to write her articles.” She can’t post if there is no phone reception or Internet.
9 years ago at 4:36 pmShe would thrive there with no indoor plumbing to clog up.
9 years ago at 5:02 pmThink she could fill the whole pool?
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Where the fuck is tech guy to clean this shit up
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9 years ago at 12:33 pmIt would be a nice little Safe Space for her away from all the hurtful words of the TFM community
9 years ago at 3:08 pmI wonder what SharkWeekTFM would have to say about the idea of a Laser Shark Aquarium.
9 years ago at 8:41 amWrong account?
9 years ago at 9:05 amIt’s a joke, people just usually do it so I thought I’d beat them to the punch. Hell, I have even done this before.
I haven’t made that mistake in a while.
The last time I made a remark towards myself trying to pretend like it wasn’t me, was on one of my own articles. Kinda over that shit these days.
9 years ago at 2:31 pmWhich means you refer to yourself on other accounts, presumably for upvotes.
9 years ago at 6:36 pmI’ll do $300 and a box of envelopes
9 years ago at 4:52 pmI’ll raise you my old TI84 calculator and my gf’s cat.
9 years ago at 5:50 pm$436 and bottle of pineapple schnapps
9 years ago at 6:48 pmHalf a box of Cheerios, 7 expired dog allergy pills and a brand new case of frozen chicken thighs, final offer.
9 years ago at 7:16 pmTo clarify, the pills are for dogs that have allergies not humans allergic to dogs.
9 years ago at 7:17 pmDogs are probably allergic to people’s bullshit.
9 years ago at 9:59 pmA cigar cutter and half a ton of dried out cope.
9 years ago at 6:37 pm50 bucks and box of ping pong balls
9 years ago at 6:51 pmTwo bumps of bad coke, 19 bucks and a Dr Pepper
9 years ago at 6:53 pm2 cases of Natty light
9 years ago at 7:07 pmWhoa. Big man on campus coming in hot.
9 years ago at 7:12 pmSome naked pics of a slut in my rotation, bag of IAMS dog food for adult dogs, and an ashtray
9 years ago at 7:22 pm2 Polaroids of my ex’s mothers drunken nip slip during vacation and the ashtray are doable but there’s no fucking you’re getting a bag of IAMS, guy.
9 years ago at 7:39 pmShit
9 years ago at 8:20 pmIntern Sydney and a empty box of cigs
9 years ago at 8:59 pmI’ll throw in an expired box of condoms and 3 room temp nattys
9 years ago at 4:01 amA VCR that only plays in reverse, a frayed iPhone charger and half a bottle of febreeze
9 years ago at 1:01 pmWhat about your buried treasure
9 years ago at 7:58 amNo but might I add the febreeze is linen sky. That’s top shelf
9 years ago at 10:40 pmbuy the town build apartments and become the provider for every service the people in town need. You’ll wake up a slum dog billionaire by your mid 30s
9 years ago at 5:32 pmmake it a safe haven for day laborers. cheap labor and no taxes. it’s great
9 years ago at 5:33 pmI had a hilarious comment in one of the previous articles and now I don’t remember where o comment it on cause I wanted to check on the up/down votes.. Have you guys ever had this happen? Asking for a friend
9 years ago at 5:46 pmI drink heavily, so yes.
9 years ago at 6:37 amLog in on computer, view profile, your content, your comments tab.
9 years ago at 3:37 pmBtw who kept fucking liking Inter Satanico’s post? It had 666 likes on it and I was hoping it stayed that way.
9 years ago at 5:49 pmIt couldn’t be her, cause shes gotta be at some witches sabbath/un baptized baby sacrifice right now with her sorority sisters
Dorn up votes her article with every masturbatory pump his neighbor kid gives him
9 years ago at 7:24 pmIntern Sydney sucks
9 years ago at 5:58 pm“Something boring like a church” Nf.
9 years ago at 6:00 pmI’d pay $1 million to feed Sid into a wood chipper.
9 years ago at 6:28 pmId buy this town and go into debt forever before I ever became excited about a new ask intern smegma article
9 years ago at 7:58 pm