You’re Not Living Unless Women Sponge Bathe You Every Morning, And Floyd Mayweather Is Living

Floyd Mayweather posted the below video yesterday with this caption: “This is how I get my day started, everyday. – MR. MY LIFE IS THE SH*T”

I’m never taking a shower again. It’s sponge baths only for this hombre starting now. Sure, I’ll have to sponge myself for the time being, but as soon as I can afford it, you bet your ass I’m hiring my own sponge bather. She’ll be sexy as hell, too. You can’t be using a luffa, ya know. Luffas are for poors. You’ve got to go full on sponge bath, with a real, hospital grade sponge.

Does it matter that a shower is a much more effective method of cleaning your body? And that a bath is essentially a term used to describe wallowing in large vat of your own filth? And that after you take a bath, it’s probably a good idea to knock out a shower while you’re still wet to clean the bath filth off of you?

No, it doesn’t matter. Sponge baths mean you’re living right.

      1. DrShooterMcGavz

        Using a GIF of yourself to respond to member posts on your own article. FFTE (Frattiest Fucking Thing Ever)

        10 years ago at 1:30 am
  1. ForresterSig

    I feel uncomfortable when my ass and balls are just on the fucking tub. Luke I’m going to get Athlete’s Gooch or something.

    10 years ago at 5:08 pm
  2. Dog_the_Pledge_Hunter

    Now I’m curious if Dan Bilzerian gets the same treatment every morning…

    10 years ago at 8:46 am