12 Of The 20 Drunkest Cities In The United States Are In Wisconsin
Having attended the University of Wisconsin-Madison, thus surrounding myself with Scons for the better part of four years, I can fully attest to the fact that the state of Wisconsin fucking drinks. The old people drink. The college kids drink. Children are even allowed to drink at bars in Wisconsin (if their parents are with them) according to state law. That’s why I believe the below ranking of the 20 drunkest cities in America is 100% accurate.
From 24/7 Wall St.:
20. Corvallis, Oregon
19. Iowa City, Iowa
18. Lincoln, Nebraska
17. Milwaukee, Wisconsin
16. Janesville, Wisconsin
15. Racine, Wisconsin
14. Grand Forks, North Dakota
13. Missoula, Montana
12. Sheboygan, Wisconsin
11. Wausau, Wisconsin
10. Mankato, Minnesota
9. Eau Claire, Wisconsin
8. Ames, Iowa
7. Fond du Lac, Wisconsin
6. La Crosse, Wisconsin
5. Fargo, North Dakota
4. Madison, Wisconsin
3. Green Bay, Wisconsin
2. Oshkosh, Wisconsin
1. Appleton, Wisconsin
The main difference between the Wisconsin cities and the other cities on this list is that in the other cities, you drink to forget you live in that city. Missoula? More like Miss-who?-la. Mankato? Bleh. Fargo? No thanks, I saw the movie. In Wisconsin, though, it’s quite the opposite — you drink to celebrate living in fucking Wisconsin.
Also, to anyone complaining about Appleton taking the number one spot — stop right there. The fraternity brother who won my chapter’s “Drunkest Brother Of The Year” award for 2014 hails from a suburb of Appleton. Believe me when I say that it more than deserves its #1 seed, because it produces people who get so drunk that they do this.
#TBT St. Patrick's Day 2013 pic.twitter.com/9p3yLGeaDA
— Jared Borislow (@DeVryGuy) March 17, 2016
God I miss Wisco..
[via 24/7 Wall St.]
Obviously these people have never been to Buffalo, NY.
9 years ago at 5:05 pmShut up Meg
9 years ago at 6:48 pmWhat else is there to do in Wisconsin, besides getting drunk?
9 years ago at 5:06 pmKill people.
9 years ago at 5:08 pmTEdGeinM.
9 years ago at 5:20 pmTBrendanDasseyM.
9 years ago at 5:36 pmTJeffDahmerM.
9 years ago at 5:50 pmTStevenAveryM?
9 years ago at 6:07 pmAssume any black guy in Green Bay plays for the Packers?
9 years ago at 6:57 pmIf you’re outside Madison and Milwaukee that’s not a bad assumption.
9 years ago at 7:33 pmThat’s ironic, one of the worst writers on this site is from Wisconsin too.
9 years ago at 5:07 pmId say its because he’s consistently drunk but now we know, since the BAC podcast video, they’re all pussies except for boosh.
9 years ago at 5:08 pmHalf of his articles could be broken down into “Guy trust me, Wisconsin is pretty cool.”
9 years ago at 5:15 pmlove me some drinkin’ down in Lincoln
9 years ago at 5:08 pmMidwest pride.
9 years ago at 5:08 pmYea, but Wisconsin can still fuck off
9 years ago at 6:57 pmFuck you too, guy. I’m not your buddy or your friend.
9 years ago at 7:20 pmIf I have to play this shitty fucking mini game again I’m deleting the app
9 years ago at 6:28 pmJust press where the x usually is in the right corner. You can exit it at any time.
9 years ago at 6:29 pmThere’s a 10 second count
9 years ago at 7:52 pmNah the 10 second count doesn’t matter just click where the x would be
9 years ago at 8:15 pmThis is just the Midwest
9 years ago at 6:34 pmFurther proof that you have to be drunk to live in Wisconsin
9 years ago at 6:46 pmThe Fox Valley produces America’s top alcoholics.
9 years ago at 7:23 pmWhen you’re sick of drinking downtown Appleton, go downtown Oshkosh. After that go to Madison. I suggest avoiding greenbay at all costs unless you’re looking to get shot or buy heroin
9 years ago at 7:24 pm