15 Phenomenal Benefits Of Having A Tiny Penis That Every Guy Will Understand

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Look fellas, I get it. Some of us are less “endowed” than others down in that disgusting sex region. It’s fine and nothing to feel ashamed about. But the LAMEstream media is out here telling you that Big Ol’ Dicks™ are still the market favorite and that tiny penises can take a seat at the back of the bus. Pathetic.

I, for one, am tired of the incessant mocking that persists among the small dick society. And, apparently, I’m not the only one. A recent Reddit thread — yes, Reddit — has gone ahead and highlighted some of the benefits of having a precious little pecker.

Here are some of the best:

1.

Awkward boners in public won’t be conspicuous

Very true. Nobody would notice.

2.

Less likely to touch the germ ridden bowl when you pee!

Public bathrooms are vile.

3.

More room in my pocket to place my lunch

Pocket space is, by far, one of the most underrated benefits.

4.

When you try to helicopter you don’t have to fear actually taking off

This problem is far too common with my big dicked buds.

5.

It can reset your cable box

Because a paper clip in a frat house can be hard to find.

6.

You can lie on your stomach.

Sleeping on your stomach is so much better when you aren’t constantly being raised six to eight inches.

7.

its super easy to find fitting underwear

No need to constantly and awkwardly adjust.

8.

It can fit in any hole

“That’s right fellas *smirks and gestures to the ear* ANY hole”

9.

If you run into a wall you’ll hurt your nose and not your penis.

Because people are running into walls constantly.

10.

No back pain

Looks like I’ll be a healthy and happy old man.

11.

Speaking as a woman, it is SO much easier to go down on/deep throat a guy who has a smaller dick.

“IT’S LIKE FLOSSING”

Hello, ma’am. The email is steveholtgoodcontent@gmail.com.

12.

Less chances to get laid = less chances to contract AIDS.

Foolproof logic.

13.

You’ll save money buying your shoes in the kids department.

Huge savings.

14.

I can use a condom 2, sometimes 3 times by tying it off.

Economical.

15.

you get to buy a huge truck

Yes, dealer man. Give me three of your finest King Ranch F-150s, lifted.

See? Small dicks are becoming trendy again. No need to feel ashamed! For more reasons why having a small penis is actually better, check out the rest of the thread HERE.

[via Reddit]

Image via YouTube

    1. ToButterThePan

      My original comment said “is everything you write strait from the reddit front page?”

      Steveholt doctored my comment for his own gain #blackballsteveholt

      10 years ago at 1:25 pm
    1. Channel4NewsTeam

      Drop in the bucket, he’s already on at least half a dozen tiny dick mailing lists.

      10 years ago at 3:17 pm
  1. Patrick Timothy Kane ll

    This is offensive to me and my tiny penis. I’m going on a hunger strike until you apologize, Steve.

    10 years ago at 10:31 am
  2. Fratan

    “Nobody would hardly notice.” I hope you realize that phrase means everybody would notice… Nice work you sack of shit.

    10 years ago at 10:51 am
  3. LouFerrigno

    16. Smaller length has been scientifically proven to reduce pullout time, further negating the need for condoms and making us statistically the safest to have sex with without fear of a kid.

    Take that, Blacks and Italians.

    10 years ago at 10:53 am
    1. GodHatesFigs

      Apparently I didn’t get the memo that we wops are supposed to be well endowed.

      10 years ago at 12:09 pm