20 Ways To Piss Off A Bleeding Heart Liberal

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There are many names for those that are left-leaners: Democrats, left wingers, liberals, or my own personal favorite: assholes. Common characteristics of these people include, but are not limited to: a devoted passion for protesting largely meaningless issues, hating just about every value that America was founded on, valuing political correctness more than the truth, and most their most defining feature, the ability to get offended by almost anything.

So, next time you feel like having a little fun with one of these special types of people, mention any of one of the below topics and it is sure to send them into a frenzy.

  1. Making money.
  2. Refusing to acknowledge that microaggressions actually exist.
  3. Building a wall.
  4. Flying the “Come and Take it” flag.
  5. Owning a large amount of American flag themed clothing.
  6. Your immigration views being strikingly similar, if not identical, to Trump’s.
  7. Claiming that global warming doesn’t exist solely based off the fact that there is snow on the ground.
  8. “Pleading the 2nd” whenever someone brings up gun control.
  9. Having a staunch appreciation and admiration for Reagan’s presidency despite the fact that you were not alive for it.
  10. Claiming that you had to overcome a tremendous amount of adversity in your life to get to where you are now despite coming from an upper-middle-class family and rarely having to work for anything in your life.
  11. Refusing to provide “trigger warnings” for mildly offensive topics.
  12. Bringing up very valid reasons as to why Bernie Sanders is a socialist.
  13. Having a deep and profound love for America and all things American, including cheeseburgers, SEC football, beer, and capitalism.
  14. Referring to their economic policies as “trickle up poverty.”
  15. Hating taxes.
  16. Believing that health care, along with a college education, is a luxury, not a right.
  17. Disagreeing with the notion that a fast food worker should be paid $15 an hour.
  18. Not coming from a minority background.
  19. Living south of the Mason-Dixon Line.
  20. Having absolutely no regard for political correctness.
  1. Frabst

    Bring up the whole “cool with abortions, but God forbid we execute murderers.”

    9 years ago at 9:53 am
    1. Reality

      I’m all for both. The fewer unwanted kids and murders the world has the better. I’m pretty sure the former turns into the latter at a very proportional rate too.

      9 years ago at 1:39 pm
      1. Bringreaganback1984

        Abortion is the murder of innocent children. Whether or not somebody is “wanted” does not change the value of their life.

        9 years ago at 4:20 pm
      2. bythegraceofgod

        It generally does though. You can be pro-life but also realize that if we didn’t allow abortions we would drive the country further into the ground economically having to support more mothers on welfare.

        9 years ago at 4:27 pm
      3. Booze_Hound

        Not necessarily true. There are countless families who would love to adopt a child. Furthermore, if abortion was outlawed it would encourage stronger values, and more responsible behavior.

        9 years ago at 12:02 am
      4. DoctorKrieger

        That’s the same moronic logic behind abstinence-only sex ed. “If we don’t tell them about condoms and birth control, they just won’t have sex!”

        9 years ago at 4:17 am
    2. Snake300

      I’m for both. I want to bang sorority sluts without a rubber and, barring abstinence, abortion is the only 100% sure way to prevent unwanted pregnancies.

      9 years ago at 9:51 am
    3. TXpike2995

      Why can’t it just be up to the woman and man who created it. It’s their responsibility to deal with their creation not anyone elses

      9 years ago at 1:02 pm
  2. Hairy Truman

    Don’t conservatives constantly get mad about the supposed “war on Christmas” Starbucks and Hitler are fighting?

    9 years ago at 9:56 am
    1. Fratty McFratFrat

      You, ChicksDigTexasFratStars, and YoungFratLords, whom I assume are all the same person, were all gone for an extended period and now you’ve all returned together. Where were you, prison?

      9 years ago at 11:14 am
  3. Hairy Truman

    And in what world are a gun and a lawyer more of a right than medicine and a doctor?

    9 years ago at 9:57 am
    1. RisingFratstarOfTX

      World where the bullet you fire into a burglar costs less that the bullet they have to dig out of you. But hey, if you’re fine with having to wait in line at the ER behind someone who doesn’t even have citizenship, go ahead and bleed out. Make a show of it.

      9 years ago at 10:17 am
      1. Hairy Truman

        So…make others require doctoral visits so that they don’t make you require doctoral visits? Does that work with disease, too?

        9 years ago at 11:20 am
      2. RisingFratstarOfTX

        Fucker breaks into MY house looking to take MY shit? You bet your ass I’m going to make him see the doctor over that. This ain’t 1980s Russia, where everything belongs to everyone.

        9 years ago at 11:46 am
      3. General_Longstreet

        No fuck that. If some deadbeat breaks into my house, his next stop is the morgue

        9 years ago at 6:00 pm
      4. RisingFratstarOfTX

        Hey Hairy, I hear the General here has some kick ass shit at his house. Maybe you should go check it out. Make sure to go at night so you don’t inconvenience him.

        9 years ago at 9:54 pm
      5. Hairy Truman

        So medical attention is only needed after one’s been shot? Thank God because I was debating

        9 years ago at 11:04 pm
      6. Hairy Truman

        whether I should fill my prescription or not, but now I know it’s only needed if someone puts a bullet in me

        9 years ago at 11:04 pm
    2. BirdDog1776

      Truman was a POS president so it doesn’t surprise me that your political views are also lacking

      9 years ago at 10:24 am
  4. Ciroc Boy

    The absolute best though, is when you tell them that ISIS is acting in direct accordance with true Islamic beliefs.

    Source: Quran

    9 years ago at 10:07 am